Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for June 23, 2024

Bill always said: “Up yours”.

Does that pose say to you “Ah, fond memories”, or “Oh my god, what the hell were we thinking?!”

“Rectum? They almost killed him!”

Bill is a piker. If he wanted to be really metal AF, he’d use a hair dryer!

After a short break, Bill resumes writing his book “Memoirs of a Defrocked Priest”.

Which was last week. He didn’t have a fever but he sure was hot!

Contactless IR detection just wasn’t the same. He still kept the old mercury stick for old times sake.

Mʏ Fᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ Pᴀʀᴛ™ ᴡᴀs “Fᴏɴᴅʟʏ.”

Oh my

Wait – didn’t Bill used to wear a bunny hat all the time.

what a pain in the ash

ha ha that’s a new one ;+)

True story (but you have to know what a baseball athletic cup is) :

A friend brought a date home to his apartment. Being a typical bachelor and softball player, he had left his “cup” laying on top of his TV set. His date picked it up and exclaimed “Is this an oxygen mask?” … and proceeded to put it over her nose and mouth‼️

( I think he told her yes and that it had belonged to his mom )

Hemrhroids, with my get Itchy w/IceyHot®.

Bill always kept his recreational rectal thermometers in the freezer.

Rectal thermometers were found to be a gateway and soon thereafter, Bill Tuned In, Turned On, and Dropped Out. He was ever after known as the AssMan, and his motto was free your a$$ and your mind will follow.

Take two as.s. burns and call me in the morning.

We ordered a suicide bundt cake and scored a run.

Choke up on the bat Darling.

Slider sliver on the butt to remove the threatened designated hotter hotter.

Bill apparently doesn’t realize that there are stores and web sites dedicated to bringing back those days, and at popular prices.

He must be a real pain in the a$$.

…surprise, surprise, surprise…

…that’s not my rectal thermometer, either…

…“I’m picking out a Thermos for you…

…And maybe a barometer too…

…And what else can I buy…

…so on me you will rely…

…a rectal thermometer, too”…

…well, it’s not quite as accurate as fahrenheit…

…but I’ll Bill you now…

…and you can bill be later…

…but it’s so woke to put it to the man…

Push gass thru.

Smelly Yelly Belly Jelly to fish bye.

Herd a joke I will share.

Use

Head and Shoulders.

Better Sex without dandruff.

Give Head,

Butt how to give Shoulders?

Bill is an enigma no more!

Those were the days, my friends.