Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for August 23, 2024

My wife is a southpaw and she’s been killed by using right-handed crescent wrenches more times than I can count. The reanimation costs are eating me alive.

Don’t forget about the ambidextrous people. They want more ways to die, too.

This is always how it starts. You cut off too much on the left, so you cut off more on the right. But then you accidentally cut off too much on the right in the process, and now you have to cut off more on the left. Pretty soon, you are sporting a mohawk.

I think we have plenty – one for every right handed person.

Pffft

Panel One: Name one left-handed person who died yesterday using a righty product.

Panel Two: Name one right-handed person who didn’t die yesterday using a lefty product.

Panel Three: (um, er, I forgot where I was going with this)

A.I.?

Specifics to follow.

Lefties are always right! ( … and Righties should be left alone. )

My father was ambidextrous by force to the right-handed religion.

I am thus by nature.

Take THAT evolution!

Buy insurance and just like that.

Yet another Left/Right conundrum …!

( keep it straight )

Left-hand monkey wrenches were a joke item that new, young apprentices were asked to get from the department tool crib — that, and ‘sky hooks.’ It was a long tradition to teach young people to take a joke well. And, not to try to lift stainless steel with a hoist magnet. (You have to have been there…)

As a left-handed person I agree. Right handed people need more ways to die.

Left me speechless.

Both are buried in the same casket.

I’ve heard it said that left-handed people are the only ones in their right mind.

Wright Brothers.

My dad, born 1921, was left handed. He was forced to learn to write right handed. I always wondered if his terrible sense of direction resulted from that.

Opposites Attract.

South Pole, North Pole.

Warp Speed

Spicy Sweet

And still, it remains true, two lefts don’t make a right.

NASCAR IN A LEFT TURN.

PIT STOP IN RIGHT TURN.

Grandiose thought, I am a mighty righty and love women in Fishnet Friday attire.

What a spectacle of dominance; fore skin removables.

Plastic dill pickles.

Pour a head, Mister Bar Keep. Go on…

this person looks confused

I’m a little offended that bald women were left out of this analysis.

Color me bemused as a left-hander. Panel 3 may be a bit extreme; or maybe not….

This is a sinister conspiracy.

Could be right about that. Left me wondering.

On the one hand this makes sense. On the other hand it does not. On the gripping hand I find this alien thinking amusing.

If I have to see that Heathen Potato storybook cover any longer maybe chalk the death of a right-handed person to FDS.*

Like some of my meds I take this new FA EOD …!

( every other day, but sometimes EOOD )

British Thread is opposite American Thread or left not right.

Get screwed.

Clock in baby.

I guess we’ll take a stab at it, being a cut-up.

I was hors de combat yesterday. Sorry, Teresa.

My bearded lady with facial hair is a big South Paw.

I am a righty for the county’s linemen.

Filling low like electrocuting myself. In need of an electro chair.

Then plowed the other side of my head. Still here to speak with left protection.

Left handed clock…

Time in a bottle.

Saving the day.

Book report:

Ursula Kroeber Le Guin was an American author. She is best known for her works of speculative fiction, including science fiction works set in her Hainish universe, and the Earthsea fantasy series.

The Left Hand of Darkness is a science fiction novel by Le Guin, published in 1969. The novel is set in the fictional Hainish universe as part of the Hainish Cycle, a series of novels and short stories.

The novel follows the story of Genly Ai, a human native of Terra, who is sent to the planet of Gethen as an envoy of the Ekumen, a loose confederation of planets. Ai’s mission is to persuade the nations of Gethen to join the Ekumen, but he is stymied by a lack of understanding of their culture. Individuals on Gethen are ambisexual, with no fixed sex; this has a strong influence on the culture of the planet, and creates a barrier of understanding for Ai.

The Left Hand of Darkness is an anti-political novel. It basically says that there’s no truly decent political system. The best we can do is make do.

I’m reasonably certain that I need to agree!!

…Left and Let Die…

…I need you to turn left here…

…right here!?…

…No…

…Left here…

…right here turn left?…

…No…

…No?…

…you missed it…

…so can I turn Left right now?…

…Left is right…

…so, go left?…

…right…

…

…you’re killing me, Smalls…

…and that’s how I learned to say, ‘correct’…

…my older brother believes he was born left handed…but that my grandmother changed him from it…

…as the urban legend goes…

…she refused to let him use his left hand at the dinner table…

…even going to the extent of tying his left hand to his chair…

…she would not let him color with it…

…he believes it to this day…

…my other not as older brother simply believes that my oldest brother used both hands somewhat equally…

…that you can’t change being left handed…

…he uses our younger left handed brother as the prime example…

…he was left handed…

…and eventhough grandmother made him wear a dress…

…put hot sauce on this left fingers…

..my younger brother remained a lefty…

..aah, the good old days….

Ooooo. Oooooo. I got an idea! Pick me. Oh please pick me….

Never mind…stupid idea…it’ll never work….☺️☹️

Put Your Best Foot Forward.

Wood Leg Counts Too?

Peter at The Gates of Heaven.

Monty Hall and The Door to Choose.

T——❤️❤️❤️