Loose Parts by Dave Blazek for September 14, 2024

What was your first hint you were going to need a smarter therapist?

The tonsure was a clue.

When he took a vow of silence.

“Well, the Limburger cheese and bean diet was kind of a clue….”

The new haircut.

His refusal to bathe has earned him a lot more ‘alone’ time.

When I started looking for divorce lawyers.

The constant visits to The Friars Club.

When I married him, he told me he wanted to be a friar. I THOUGHT he was going to be a fryer and get a job at a local restaurant.

She finally got the monk off her back.

“When he stopped bathing.”

heard a joke years ago: a guy enters a monastery and is told he’s allowed 2 words every 5 years. 5 years go by, and he says “bed’s hard!”… 5 years later, he says “food’s bad!”… another 5, “I quit!”… one of the bigwigs says to another “it’s just as well, all he ever did was complain!”

Better make sure he doesn’t sell flowers. Because only you can prevent florist friars.

When he started making those pretzels

poor gal. he gave her no friar warning…