Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for June 17, 2011
Transcript:
Kate: Sigh... Does anyone actually but into this? Danae: Sure do. Kate: Really? Why? Danae: Well, as it says in the Bible... Danae: Mine is not to reason why, mine is just to capitalize. Kate: Uh... since when is that in the Bible? Danae: Since I gave it a badly needed translation update.
comicgos over 13 years ago
No shortage of that going around!
pouncingtiger over 13 years ago
@comicgos, how true, how true.
x_Tech over 13 years ago
It’s right there in the Gospel According to Danae.
kreole over 13 years ago
“Rapture Insurance” to guarantee your afterlife…uh, ..if you don’t get an afterlife, how does it pay off?
tripwire45 over 13 years ago
Some people manipulate the Bible for their own ends, whether they’re religious or just people who want to exploit the religious.
roctor over 13 years ago
Saving the the flock calls for capitalization of prophets.
ProudBluenoser over 13 years ago
Hate to burst any bubbles, but that is not a quote taken from the Bible. Its’ from a poem “The Charge of the Light Brigade” by Alfred, Lord Tennyson. Verse 2
wicky over 13 years ago
Beware of false profits.
puddleglum1066 over 13 years ago
“Ours is not to reason why; ours is just to make rats die.” —FDA food/drug safety researcher (from a 70’s vintage SF story whose title I no longer remember)
siddharthp over 13 years ago
New Danae Version?
siddharthp over 13 years ago
& i like the charge of the light brigade!
Sandfan over 13 years ago
Now if we could just get Danae to do a little work on the Koran.
freeholder1 over 13 years ago
direct storyline lift from WKRP in Cin. The one whre the phony evangelist on the radio is selling Dead Sea Scroll steak knives and the management makes him stop so he starts selling heaven insurance at the end of the show.By the way,dogsniff, there are also anti-religion fanatics, witness the above. ;-)
freeholder1 over 13 years ago
Sorry, Danae, but the Bible has been gutted by real experts before you. Unless you start a crusade and get millions killed, your “translation” is a mere dust mote on degrading God’s word.
freeholder1 over 13 years ago
She does have a place reserved on Charasmatic TV, though.
LeonardWatson over 13 years ago
You will not find your sacrilege so funny when you stand before God to answer for it.
Noveltman over 13 years ago
Amen, brother! Geez, these religious people and their holier than thou—“I don’t need to be kind since I’m trying to insult them into accepting the faith.”
GeraldTarrant over 13 years ago
There was actually a company that promised to have a certified non-believer (with a signed certificate and everything) take care of your pet after you were raptured. Capitalism at its best, right there.
fritzoid Premium Member over 13 years ago
I decline to deal with middlemen. If God has a message for me, He can deliver it personally (being omniscient, He knows where to find me). And, since He knows my innermost mind better than I know myself, He would no doubt be able to frame His arguments such that I would find them convincing.
Bertrand Russell was once asked what he would say to God if, against every expectation, he found himself compelled to account for his life before the Throne of Judgment. His answer was “I would say ‘Sir, we were not given enough information.’”
Destiny23 over 13 years ago
So, Dogsniff, you need to know the origin of God before you can believe in the existence of God? Fair enough. Since you don’t know the origin of the matter that predated and led to the Big Bang, that means you don’t believe in the Big Bang. Or the existence of matter, or the Universe for that matter, since you don’t know where any of it came from…
Photius over 13 years ago
I could see Danae starting her own religion someday…
LeonardWatson over 13 years ago
Dear Mr. Dogsniff, The last time I checked we still had freedom of religion and freedom of speech as Constitutionally protected rights in this country. As such you are free to choose not to believe in God if you wish. However, I would like to point out that simply because you choose not to belive in God does not change that fact that He exists and that some day you and every other human being will stand before Him to answer for your life. I would also like to point out that I simply stated a fact in my original post. I neither condoned nor condemned you or your beliefs, it is you who has taken a hostile approach in attacking me and what you presume my beliefs may be. I suggest that before you go around attacking other people for thier beliefs that you first read your own post and quit condemning people with differing views and practice the tolerance you so boldly proclaim to believe in.
WaitingMan over 13 years ago
I am a proud, devout atheist. The only time I’ll attack someone for their belief in god is if they attack by non-belief first. Otherwise, I just leave them alone.
Wiley creator over 13 years ago
Can’t believe some of you are actually getting into debate over religion/God about this.
ldyhwkd over 13 years ago
@Dogsniff & others – I wish to sincerely apologize on behalf of those Christians like myself who do not believe in shoving religion down the throats of others. I do not belive that is what the Bible teaches, nor is it how Christians should behave. Please know, not all Christians are like that.
bmonk over 13 years ago
Danae reminds me of the college professor in business who claimed St. Benedict’s Rule was capitalist, because he told his monks they should try to sell things a bit more cheaply than non-monks. It’s in there, but to make it a capitalist principle is to miss the point.
Varnes over 13 years ago
The difference between faith and belief is that if you have faith, you can only hope you’re right. You never know for sure, because it can’t be proven. If it could be proven, then it would be believable. Like gravity, air and centrifugal force. They can’t be seen, but all can be demonstrated, and proven. Religious dogma just can’t. I’m open to the idea of a Great Spirit dwelling inside of all creation, but it’s impossible to believe it until it’s proven…
dflak over 13 years ago
Reigion: belief based on faith.
Science: belief based on fact.
Never the twain shall meet.
cdward over 13 years ago
Charge of the light Brigade – I figured someone would actually have named it by now.
Varnes over 13 years ago
And now for something completely different. It’s amazing that the designation Wienergate hasn’t been used before. There’s been lots of chances….
yohannbiimu over 13 years ago
Four months from now, this religious abomination (Harold Camping) will be telling us all that the end of the world happened, and that all of the damned were destroyed metaphysically, but the physical destruction of everything will happen when the Mayans predicted the end, sometime next year. He’s definitely worth of everyone’s disdain.
blsamuel over 13 years ago
“The World According To Danae” would be a hoot.