Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 23, 2012
Transcript:
"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men, couldn't put Humpty together again. So, Humpty sued the king's men for malpractice. And sued the wall's engineer for defective design. And sued the city for negligence. Making Humpty rich. And sitting on the wall different. 'But this isn't fun, mommy. Tighten your helmet strap, Timmy.'" Goat: 'The Lawyer's Book O' Fairy Tales'?? Rat: Gives them an updated feel. Pig: Yaaaay for our legal system!! Yaaaay!!
hariseldon59 about 12 years ago
Sorry Rat, it’s already been done. Check out “Politically Correct Bedtime Stories” or “When Jack Sued Jill – Nursery Rhymes for Modern Times”.
margueritem about 12 years ago
Pig, just sit down and be quiet.
BRI-NO-MITE!! Premium Member about 12 years ago
Why is Humpty always depicted as an egg?
John Niegowski about 12 years ago
Because if he were a Ming vase it would be ridiculous
Varnes about 12 years ago
The funny thing is, civil trials actually change things quicker than criminal trials. Want to change somebody’s behavior? Take all their money away. That’s what got OJ….Make it too costly for a company to do something, and they’ll stop doing it….money rules….
greg_liu about 12 years ago
Too many Humpties in this country ruining it for everybody.
Sisyphos about 12 years ago
Bless you, Pastis, for getting out of that questionable profession and into something wholesome and honest like cartooning! And to think that, up to now, I had rather liked Humpty and would from time to time sit on a wall. How reckless of me!
orinoco womble about 12 years ago
Check out Rhymes.org.uk for the story behind Humpty Dumpty. The “egg man” is because of Alice in Wonderland. However from about the 15th century, “dumpty” meant a very overweight person. This is still in use in rural areas of the US, though it has become “dumpy”.
knight1192a about 12 years ago
In this case Goat has the wrong face and Rat actually is in the right. That’s today’s society, sue, sue, sue. And the ambulance chasers make certain to push that mentality. The way the commercials are going now I’m half expecting to soon see “If you’re great-great grandfather whom you never even would have known under normal circumstances and could care less about them died from choking on a cranberry then it’s probably causing you great emotional distress. Call us, we’ll help get the money you deserve.”
red_96vette about 12 years ago
Deep down inside,….Pastis still can’t get over being a suit…..
doublepaw about 12 years ago
“And all the king’s lackeys and all the king’s dregsThat night for supper had scrambled eggs.”
eddie6192 about 12 years ago
That dumb Pig is so happy that he’s airborne………hope he doesn’t have a great fall.
Paul Drazen about 12 years ago
Seems clear enough, the yolk’s on us.
jmartin1955 about 12 years ago
Funny as all get out and so true. LOL
i_am_the_jam about 12 years ago
Sadly true
bgby4884 about 12 years ago
Um, somehow I don’t think it’s corporations behind all this silliness. In fact, they are often the victims of a lot of it. No, it’s nervous Nellies who think we should all live in a cocoon. You know, the ones who like to tell everyone else what to do.
JoeStrike about 12 years ago
Did you ever notice they always make the person who’s suing the bad guy, never the company for making crappy or dangerous products? Too many companies would run over their own grandmother (they are people, aren’t they? I heard somebody running for office say that) for a nickel’s extra profit if they thought they could get away with it … I used to write news promos at a TV station; when I wrote one suggesting maybe there were 2 sides to the story the news director blew his stack because he wanted a “how are we going to stop these crazy lawsuits?” promo, period.
finale about 12 years ago
@bpullin:.“Torte reform”? If the cake has crumbled; eat it rather than try to put it back together! Pastry does not heal.
m.l. about 12 years ago
The#1BoiseStateFan about 12 years ago
what the @*%$? this doesn’t make sense. (rat’s story doesn’t make sense)
marshalljpeters Premium Member about 12 years ago
I don’t get involved in lawsuits, but I wish there was a better way to put the fault where it belongs. You can’t just always blame the corporations, or the victims. Also, sometimes no one is really to blame. Some things are just accidents, or the blame is shared.
lawre3 about 12 years ago
Everybody hates lawyers until they need one…
lawre3 about 12 years ago
The jury system is the best system in the world. As usual, people want to second guess those who sat and heard the evidence in a lot of these cases. We don’t need tort reform, we need insurance companies that actually provide insurance rather than try and screw injured people.
marshalljpeters Premium Member about 12 years ago
I’ve got a technical question, not related to the strip, but I couldn’t find where else to post. How do you put italics in a comment? [i]This doesn’t seem to work.[/i]
lawre3 about 12 years ago
Type your sentence, select the words you want, the news os5 will give you the option to underline or italicize. This is if you have iPad or iPhone.
BillWa about 12 years ago
More like a Liberal Egg-Head
route66paul about 12 years ago
It is very rare that the injured person gets more than enough money to even pay for his expenses, much less loss of earnings, or the like. What do you think happens to them? We taxpayers pay for SS disability until he is able to get SS retirement. Who do you think should pay?When someone gets a big award, he is usually not able to get around to enjoy it and the reason is partially punitive because they did something so blatantly wrong that the judge had to stick it to them.Walk a mile on my gimp sticks
Hoodude about 12 years ago
He!! Yes you losers,now we’re gonna talk pain and suffering.Oh boo hoo…Cheers,Hoodude
Sherlock Watson about 12 years ago
That Humpty is a real hard-boiled character.
Sherlock Watson about 12 years ago
Not long ago people had bumper stickers that read, “Humpty Dumpty was pushed!” Anyone remember those?
Number Three about 12 years ago
LOL LOL… Excellent!
xxx
GerardoDreadful about 12 years ago
Pig is a fawner
lmonteros about 12 years ago
Ah, Pastis, spoken like a true Californian!
vwdualnomand about 12 years ago
sometimes the king’s men are negligent…see hillsborough, iraq war,bank deregulation, etc…. sometimes engineers have a defective design…see edsel, pinto, corvair, thalidomide, etc…
Cat Hammer about 12 years ago
“Hate” speech is nothing like the fire/theater situation, at least not under U.S. law, and we should avoid that facile but erroneous analogy, since it, too, aids the arguments of those who’d like to exercise a “heckler’s veto” (look it up…very limited application to situations of immediate danger ).
“..it is NEVER then (sic) speaker who suffers..” Really? Tell that to Kurt Westergaard, Theo van Gogh, Salman Rushdie…
“…then perhaps it is an acceptable infringement. do I advocate that? NO, absolutely not…” Cognitive dissonance? If you absolutely don’t advocate it, then there’s no perhaps..acceptable about it.
vldazzle about 12 years ago
Boo for the legal system that has ruined fun play equipment for this generation of kids ;-( It was SO much more fun when we had tall metal slides and monkey bars and merry-go-rounds that had no restraints.
the burser about 12 years ago
there are far to many people that actually do this
angelfiredragon about 12 years ago
Lets all start choking on little round magnetic balls and then sue (if we live for being so stupid) cause this comic is so true.
Sure there is certain situations that require it due to negligence but I’ve seen more examples in my life of negligent people being stupid. One example I can think of is someone sticking their arm into the moving pieces of farm equipment, he lost his arm and sued. He won the lawsuit saying it should have been labeled, company went out of business due to it so guy never got his money, lost arm worth sticking your arm into a place with many sharp moving blades, chains and gears? Its would be safer to stick your hand in the fan blade of a car motor.
Then of course you have the criminal who fell through the sky light and sued the owners for negligence saying it wasn’t strong enough. I also know a lady who purposely walks near stores on ice in the winter to see if she can fall to sue for ice being there. She goes out of her way to find ice, I do not like this lady.
I am no fan of big corporations but a lawsuit against one of them just increases prices for everyone else, when I read about Kroger losing the lawsuit for the guy who bought pop corn and ate two bags a day till he got popcorn lung, I thought how stupid he did it to himself by eating two bags a day. Why doesn’t he sue himself for eating two bags a day, that is negligence in itself.
Phil (full phname Philip Philop) over 7 years ago
Man,this one is popular.
Pig111 over 4 years ago
The mom payed 150 bucks for her child to sit on that wall??? (Read the signs)
Its_dshen112 about 1 year ago
The kid is timmy failure