Herman by Jim Unger for October 12, 2022

Just deserts

Maybe not a good idea to pre-announce it.

Expect a little spit on your dessert

Waiters and waitresses learn that money doesn’t always grow on trays.

“Your dessert, sir. A single grape.”

S-o-o-o-o-o That’s one dessert to wear home?

If you’re going to eat out, unless the server is a total a$$, pls don’t stiff them on the gratuity.

Oh, you’re getting the “special” dessert.

DQ would seem more his speed.

I would not have told him that until I got it

In most other countries that wouldn’t be a problem as people get paid a living wage.

How sweet of you ma’am….

He’ll start with dessert, then have dessert and finally finish with dessert…

Better order something he can’t pee in.

I would not tell him that before I have gotten the desert.

Well, at places like the Cheesecake Factory, you can buy a cheesecake on your way out after having paid the bill and left the table. That way you don’t have to tip on the price of the cheesecake. So at places like that…wait until you get home to have dessert. (Just like I always wait until I get home to have any beverage other than free tap water with my restaurant meals).

Well don’t be cheap, make sure it’s worth at least 20%.

Your gratuity on my self-gratitude.

I understand Sir. However, do not forget to calculate the (just approved) 30% dinner tax…..

If you use Apple Pay, you don’t have to leave a tip

Nice tradeoff!

He may give you dessert in a way you wouldn’t want it…

Because of the increase in beverage prices, in order to have money to leave a tip, I have to forego beverages and drink water. I really miss my ice tea with meals.

Nice to know that up front, gives him time to think of creative to serve it.

…And he will eat your dessert.

Don’t be surprised if the dessert tastes a bit strange.