Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for January 05, 2022

Lawyers take the fun out of everything

What would be even more biblical is David and Goliath taking out the agents.

David won, but he had to give four of the remaining five stones to his counsel.

What about the broadcast rights?!?

And David’s share of the gate. Oh! That’s right. He rode the publicity to lead a nation, looked good for a while, then messed up. A very old story, often repeated in centuries that followed.

And then Goliath reaches out and pounds David’s lawyer.

Ok, a small sling, but no defensive armor. They agree to three minutes each of free-form verbal taunting before the actual event commences. And a percentage of the betting proceeds.

They say everyone hates lawyers, until they need one. I needed one once, and she was useless. So, I still hate lawyers.

I know how this works out, but I suspect that if David had a better advocate, he would have lost. …maybe

Davey’s lawyer had an inside line with Caesar’s sports app.

One of the benefits of playing D&D is that you learn early on to start out with your distance weapons before you ever get into hand-to-hand range.

In a surprise development,the last will and testamentof Betty White contained enough evidence to send Donald Trump up for life.

“Just give David what he wants, lawyer. All this arguing is making my head hurt. One more thing gets hurled at me and It’s going to kill me,”

I am betting that AB’s agent is wishing he had pushed for CTE treatment a little sooner instead of trying to get ‘Just one more season’. Although sadly, treatment options are limited at best.

For the Israelites knew the value of superior firepower.

Makes for great Pay per View (Spoiler: It’s over in the first round)

David’s sling lessons were part of the deal too.

As a first-round draft choice, his agent/lawyer should be getting a chariot as well as the sling.

Oh, and no helmets, either.

David, after you’ve through with Goliath, have a go with Donald Trump.

Where are his sword and shield?

Said rock not to exceed 1 kg in mass, composition can be sedimentary or metamorphic, not igneous.

Goliath was around 6ft while the average size was 5ft.

So long as Goliath is allowed to wear armour and carry a sword.

Goliath’s agent really screwed the pooch on that negotiation!