Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 11, 2016

He just wants you to remember to put on your sunblock.

I like to go to that beach when women go there who have adopted hunting birds, which they bring along. I really enjoy that mother-falcon beach scene.

Man, way to work on the double sense there. I don’t think the comic covers beaches.

gee, Steph, you’re sneaky putting pseudo-vulgarity in your comics

Rat should go to Florida. Lots of sunny beaches down there.

PSA: In the winter, you can find gold jewelry with a metal detector and some digging; we call it the gold digging cold beach.

The Spanish version is a totally different comic today because the joke doesn’t work in Spanish.If you want to go look at the Spanish version here is the translation:Panel 1Pig – What are you doing Rat?Rat – I became a map cartographer.Panel 2 Pig – What are all of those dots?Rat – That’s where all of the stupid people are.Panel 3Pig – That’s a lot of dots.Rat – I almost ran out of pens.

The beaches here in NC are quite arrogant

If he goes to the nude beach by Norfolk, he can see female Virginians.

Sun of a beach bleached son……………

I met a woman who loved some sun of a beach, but when I asked her out, she told me to eat shiitakes and die.

Stephen is watching old Jimmy Stewart movies again

Anybody remember the beginning of the movie Stripes, where Harold Ramis is teaching English as a second language, and all his students can say are, “Sun of Beach, Sheet?”

Toon Boy was laying out in the sun too long.

After WWII a woman immigrated from France and asked her friends where to find Mrs. Beech. Mrs. Beech, which Mrs. Beech. The one who had so many sons during the war.

I was on a guided tour of Malaga, Spain. The guide said, “Malaga is famous for its b!tches. We have many beautiful b!tches in Malaga. Our b!tches are very popular. People come from all over to lie on our b!tches.” His English was much better than my Spanish, so I didn’t have the heart to correct him.

I noticed censor guy rushing in before I’d actually read the comic, and before I’d read the whole thing, thought it was going to be something about sticking it where the sun don’t shine.

I just learned that beech trees can have children. A beech can have a daughter — or for that matter, a son.

The censor has you this time, Pastis. You have to admit you deserved it for THAT pun. :D

I don’t like the sun of a yard, either.

These comics remind me of the 90s children’s cartoon Animaniacs.

This is a very old pun. I heard it way back in the 1970’s at a rodeo when the rider cursed his bull (which could not be heard by the audience). The announcer said that the rider was mumbling something about the sun of the beach.Nothing new here. It’s actually the first time Stephan left me completely unimpressed!

Pig: I hit a pedestrian yesterday, but I think he was a tourist.Rat: Why?Pig: As I drove away, he was muttering something about sunny beaches.

Yaaayyyy! The censor’s back!

Clever, but running out of plot ideas?

In 1988, Bette Midler and Barbara Hershey starred in a film about two women. It was titled “Beaches”.

The beach is nice, but I like the dam site better.

While recently lost in Mexico… “We must be near the ocean, dear.” “Why do you say that?” “That group of people you nearly ran over was shouting something about sunny beaches.”

Dying laughing.

No Pig, I think the censor just hates Rat.

Never mind Pig, he’s just a bass turd…

We used to have a Spanish teacher in high school, her name was Mrs. Beach. What with accents and all, we had a good time with her name. The thing of it was she laughed right along with us, she was a sweet lady, not a beach at all.

Yes. Life’s a beach!

(I couldn’t agree more with that saying)

xxx

No one has mentioned Tony Paroni yet.

Ity is truly amazing how many people confuse ‘to lay’ with ‘to lie.’

! Laughed out loud – a rarity with the comics these days! – Thank you!!! :)

Pig might be corrected to say, “want to LIE out in the sun with me?” I think there might be a whole comic strip on ‘lay, laid, laid’ and ‘lie, lay, lain.’ Good going!

Sorry I’m late, Comic Strip Censor-guy. I got hung up on the grammatical error in panel 1 (one lies, not “lays,” out in the sun). But maybe Cartoon-Boy was going for the colloquial effect….

Or as I like to say …

Son of a monkey!

Clever, though.