Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for March 04, 2019

Pig should get a job he can do from his bed.

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/02/opinion/sunday/right-wing-site-comments.amp.html

Pig needs to spend more time in the shower and drinking coffee

You get out of bed for the coffee. And because you have to (warmly) pee.

At night Pig sits in front of a cold fire, cold fire… Thank you, Neil Peart for the suggestion.

Pig’s life is basically a cold meat sandwich on toasted bread.

I’m going on school camp tomorrow. I’ll catch up on GoComics on Friday when I get back

Just spend the day watching TV and tweeting on the toilet, and call it “executive time”.

5:15 P.M. Happy hour. All is good with the world again.

That time in the cold world buys you the warm bed, water, and coffee.

Said the cartoonist who gets to set his own schedule.

Pig time to go to the Larry Croc school of life ! Croc Power !

The really sad part is that from 9 to 5, you probably aren’t even doing anything that’s actually useful.

How does Pastis get away with shower nudity? They can’t get away with that over at Arlo and Janis.

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Yep, pretty much everything after coffee.

hence the work solution: don’t stop drinking coffee.

Dump the Internet, Pig, and interact with some warm friends.

Change “world” to “beer”.

Pig needs to grow thicker skin,too delicate for this cruel world,maybe he could wrap a couple of deflated Rawlings around himself…you hearing me Mr.Brady (NE Pats)!

I should have said it yesterday: Pig is such a drama Queen.

Dang cold world with adult responsibilities, work and bills! Dang you, cold world…Dang you all to heck!

Pig needs to be like most other employees , not actually working, but just pretending to. That way, he could still drink his coffee and not be so sad :(

Don’t forget the time spent at puns.com looking for cartoon material.

Sigh If it’s the early bird that catches the worm, why’d the worm get outta bed?

For me, slightly different. Warm bed, hot shower, steaming coffee, funny comics. I like to start my day with a grin.

You get to sleep in until 7??

Notice this was not written by the cat – who never made it beyond the first step.

I do both….but I have to eat my Triple Chocolate Biscotti post haste…..and then brush teeth, shave…….my friends don’t call me Mr Prune fer nothin’

Pig should learn to write without getting ink all over himself.

Panel 5 – never seen Pig that depressed. Time for a shrink?

Pig could improve things with actual HOT coffee. Warm coffee is sad.

To pee.

I see where your problem is. You skipped over “8:30 AM. Pig goes back to bed.” Who need that “9 to 5” thing anyway?

This’ll probably be a real hit in coffee mug sales.

The “cold world” part actually starts with the commute to work. Trying to avoid being killed by all the sociopathic drivers out there sets the day off with a bad mood and a great deal of stress. Then you have the same problem driving home, which helps to ruin your mood for the rest of the day.

I can only imagine Pig working in an office.

How the heck does it take Pig an hour to drink one cup of coffee???

honestly tho this is my life