Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 16, 2019

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    BE THIS GUY  almost 5 years ago

    Ooh, ooh, don’t forget the horsies!

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    Kveldulf  almost 5 years ago

    Care about the world and the millions of species on it. That means caring a whole lot LESS about people.

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    B UTTONS  almost 5 years ago

    … Cats okay if they take out the Rat

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    Charliegirl Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    I’m highly allergic to my cats so I take allergy shots. They’re worth it.

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    Kveldulf  almost 5 years ago

    I kind of like snakes but they are boring. Bearded dragons, on the other hand, are real characters. My niece has one called Ash.

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    Gent  almost 5 years ago

    You only need to care about us bears. So gimme all your food now.

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    Concretionist  almost 5 years ago

    Wiccans use just two:

    1: If it hurts none, you may do it.

    2: Protect the weak from the strong.

    is the hard one: You really really have to consider consequences! #2 isn’t as easy as it seems either when you really look hard.
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    Sherlock Watson  almost 5 years ago

    “The lord Jehovah has given you these fifteen… (CRASH) Oy… Ten, ten commandments for all to obey!”

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    DennisinSeattle  almost 5 years ago

    Pig, that doesn’t really cover the “honor the Lord thy God” bit.

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    AGED_ENGINEER Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    What about Snuffles, Pig?

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    Liverlips McCracken Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    No mention of rats, goats, zebras, or pigs? Crocs – - – tough call.

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    some idiot from R'lyeh Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    Didn’t some bloke get them down to two a few millennia ago? I think he ended up being nailed to a tree.

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    Radish...   almost 5 years ago

    Pig is a lot stronger than I thought.

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    zerotvus  almost 5 years ago

    how about just 1 line….do unto others, as other do unto you.

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    mjb515  almost 5 years ago

    Someone already edited down to one… ""YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF."

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    GROG Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    There’s no accounting for taste.

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    tripwire45  almost 5 years ago

    Actually, the ten commandments can be divided up into two categories as Jesus did in some of the Gospels: Love God. Love other people.

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    wrd2255  almost 5 years ago

    Better include “care about pigs…no, not just for bacon”

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    Ignatz Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    I have never in my life regretted being nice to a dog or a cat. I can’t say that about people.

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    Ellis97  almost 5 years ago

    Pig has his options.

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    Zebrastripes  almost 5 years ago

    Oy! Gods creatures, including man, deserve the utmost respect…….

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    lv2sew  almost 5 years ago

    For me, it’s dogs that are iffy. I’m 66, and just now starting allergy shots! And I had just started making handmade dog collars for craft fairs.

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    Jimvideo  almost 5 years ago

    Actually, Jesus himself shortened it to just two commandments. “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ Matthew 22:37-39.

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    mail2jbl  almost 5 years ago

    The Ten Commandments can be summarized as follows:

    Commandments 1-4: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, strength, and mind.”

    Commandments 5-10: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”

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    aerotica69  almost 5 years ago

    TANSTAAFL.

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    lenrph  almost 5 years ago

    Dogs are people, too! Cats, not so much.

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    mauser7  almost 5 years ago

    I feel your pain pig, so am I.

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    Cameron1988 Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    Too bad there aren’t any dog characters in this strip

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    AaronHayes  almost 5 years ago

    Close, but no cigar. I personally can relate to the last 2 panels.

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    asmbeers  almost 5 years ago

    “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all your heart, soul, and mind and you neighbor as yourself. In this is all the law and the Prophets.” Jesus.

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    DCBakerEsq  almost 5 years ago

    You forgot ferrets.

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    Elder Lee Fox  almost 5 years ago

    The planet may not be to our liking, but it will be here. We need to save the flora and fauna of the planet.

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    COL Crash  almost 5 years ago

    I’ve got it down to just one. Respect all forms of life, even those that are annoying, like Humans.

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    kunddog  almost 5 years ago

    everyone talks but no one is willing do the sacrifices necessary to make the changes. As soon as involves themselves doing the work its to extreme.

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    rm8ty  almost 5 years ago

    Only one commandment needed; “Don’t be a dick.”

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    Snoots  almost 5 years ago

    The ten commandments have already been simplified to just two, with those able to be shortened even further:

    Love God, because he loves you.Love everyone else from your heart, regardless of personal bias.

    If everyone practiced those things, the majority of the Earth’s problems would end. No one would drive dangerously. Wars would cease, as would production of all weapons. The gun fanatics would reduce their compulsion to simple hunting (if that). Drug sales would end and we would de-criminalize drug addicts and put them in effective rehab centers instead. We’d make sure food was distributed properly so no one starved, and medicines would cease costing an absurd $400+ for a single pill. People would be nice to each other on forums, and stop believing their personal opinions should be the personal opinions of everyone else.

    Most of all, we would begin loving ourselves enough to stop vegetating in front of televisions and computer games and instead get out and improve our own health and productivity for the good of mankind. We would provide adequate education for everyone, everywhere, and the numerous undiscovered Einsteins out there might finally discover the cure for cancer, the flu and the common cold. Money would stop being the center of focus… and meeting people’s basic needs the primary goal. No one would ever be turned away from proper healthcare because they couldn’t pay for it. They are our brothers and sisters, and they need help.

    Two simple commandments… which so many, many on this planet totally reject. And then we wonder why we’re in the global mess we’re in. The answer is simple: because people are selfish and self-centered and refuse to do what we are supposed to do: have love for one another.

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    marilynnbyerly  almost 5 years ago

    The Golden Rule is also good shortcut. The young among us have “Don’t be a d*ouchbag.” That works, too.

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    zeexenon  almost 5 years ago

    Those tablets are heavy. Moses should have had a wheelbarrow to haul down the first batch. Pig is obviously hopped up on drugs.

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    Steve Prime  almost 5 years ago

    You can some it up into one: Do not steal. https://www.prageru.com/video/do-not-steal/

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    David Rickard Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    I prefer Carlin’s Condensed Commandments: https://youtu.be/sk81tUUhRig

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    flying spaghetti monster  almost 5 years ago

    for all the talk on the ten commandments in the end it really didn’t work out all that well in the real world.

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    Bonita Voigt  almost 5 years ago

    He could have put it on one commandment – “Care about other people and animals too.”

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    Petemejia77  almost 5 years ago

    Wild Stallion said it best…." Be EXCELLENT to each other"

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    Katsuro Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    They’re not actually ten. Dividing them up into exactly ten commandments is a later invention, and not in the scripture. Not to mention that where one commandment ends and another begins varies from version to version.

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    WCraft Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    Very clever, Mr. Pastis! Now do one with the 10 commandments from the Quran. The Quran speaks of them in Surah Anaam, 6:151-153 and Surah Isra’, 17:23-39. Should be a real knee-slapper!

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    Sisyphos  almost 5 years ago

    Pig has it right. If cute cat videos don’t turn your stomach, you are probably already dead….

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    Doctor Go  almost 5 years ago

    Smart Pig. (And I get the cats issue.)

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    edoyle527743  almost 5 years ago

    we should all do our part in making the world more healthy so we can be loving to other people like God wanted it to be

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    CalLadyQED  almost 5 years ago

    Jesus Christ summed up the whole of Scripture with this “Behave with respect to other people how you want other people to behave toward you.” Pig’s “Care about other people” is oversimplified, but it gets the jist.

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    CalLadyQED  almost 5 years ago

    I don’t like cats. My neighbor’s cat sleeps on our cars. It left paw prints all over my hood once.

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    Swirls Before Pine  almost 5 years ago

    Pig didn’t ‘shorten’ the Ten Commandments to three, he ‘replaced’ them, with three different ones. And apparently he can add additional ones at a moment’s notice.

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    One Navy Seal  over 4 years ago

    My friend is allergic to cats, and has lived with a cat since he was one. I think life had too much to drink when deciding his allergies.

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    WendesdayGirl  almost 2 years ago

    i love cats

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