Hello, Ripley’s fans. I recently told a tale from National Breast (Cancer) Awareness Month. The following short joke is in honor of National Attention Deficit We
A termite walks into a bar and asks “Is the bar tender here?”
Well, snails have captured the imagination of the RBION crowd today, so let’s try a snail joke.
A woman is preparing a French dinner for her parents and sends her husband out to buy some fresh snails.
The husband buys the snails then pops into the pub for a quick drink. One thing leads to another and he stays for a few rounds, so many in fact, that by the time he leaves it’s nine in the evening. Realizing he’s extremely late the husband runs home, pours the snails over the path leading to his house, then he rings the bell.
His furious wife opens the door. “Where the heck have you been?” she screams. The husband waves back to the snails, “Come on, lads!” he shouts “We’re nearly there!”.
eromlig almost 3 years ago
Hello, Ripley’s fans. I recently told a tale from National Breast (Cancer) Awareness Month. The following short joke is in honor of National Attention Deficit We
A termite walks into a bar and asks “Is the bar tender here?”
As Porky would have said, That’s All, Folks!
monkeysky almost 3 years ago
Slime in general is a pretty incredible substance. Hagfish slime also has unusual properties, and spider silk starts out as a slimelike fluid.
Templo S.U.D. almost 3 years ago
that French library sounds like something Charlie Brown would go to at the suggestion of Lucy van Pelt
Caldonia almost 3 years ago
Whoever tested snails and slugs by making them climb over razor blades are a buncha weirdos.
Caldonia almost 3 years ago
A cannibal was stewing a marine biologist. His wife came in the kitchen and said “You’re making dinner? There’s something fishy going on here.”
therese_callahan2002 almost 3 years ago
I’ll bet unicycle hockey players spent more time in the hospital than on the field.
therese_callahan2002 almost 3 years ago
That’s some library.
Charlie Fogwhistle almost 3 years ago
Well, snails have captured the imagination of the RBION crowd today, so let’s try a snail joke.
A woman is preparing a French dinner for her parents and sends her husband out to buy some fresh snails.
The husband buys the snails then pops into the pub for a quick drink. One thing leads to another and he stays for a few rounds, so many in fact, that by the time he leaves it’s nine in the evening. Realizing he’s extremely late the husband runs home, pours the snails over the path leading to his house, then he rings the bell.
His furious wife opens the door. “Where the heck have you been?” she screams. The husband waves back to the snails, “Come on, lads!” he shouts “We’re nearly there!”.
It’s a little slow. Until next time.
derdave969 almost 3 years ago
Can you imagine if Carnegie had all his libraries built like that?
Count Olaf Premium Member almost 3 years ago
Le Tete Carree Library in Not So Nice, France, is shaped like Charlie Brown. Told to me by a friend. Named Lucy.
Huckleberry Hiroshima almost 3 years ago
Shaped like a giant politician.
Take care, may aspiring Emperor Donald “Who Needs Gourmet When We have Whoppers And Chicken Buckets” Trumpord be with you, and gesundheit.
Count Olaf Premium Member almost 3 years ago
Ew. Who wants to use a slimy razor blade?
joe piglet Premium Member almost 3 years ago
No comments about General Kurtz Apocalypses Now : “I watched a snail crawl along the edge of a straight razor. That’s my dream; that’s my nightmare.”
scpandich almost 3 years ago
How does one slightly deflate a tennis ball? It’s not really inflated to begin with.
oakie817 almost 3 years ago
my mucus is so slimy i can crawl over 2 razor blades
artegal almost 3 years ago
I’m pretty sure unicycle hockey started as a bet between two drunken frat guys.
poppacapsmokeblower almost 3 years ago
Where is the library’s entrance … and exit?
WCraft Premium Member almost 3 years ago
I’ll bet those unicycle hockey players keep the emergency rooms hopping!
markhughw almost 3 years ago
…but then the snail doesn’t have to shave for a week!
mindjob almost 3 years ago
Segway hockey is more fun than unicycle hockey
Bilan almost 3 years ago
I’m wondering if the architect of the library was making a joke about nerds.
globalenterprize1990 almost 3 years ago
From the movie Apocalypse Now. Colonel Kurtz’s dream.
Running Buffalo Premium Member almost 3 years ago
Unicycle hockey - since at least 1960!
ekke almost 3 years ago
Hmm. How do you slightly deflate a tennis ball? For that matter, how do you pump up a tennis ball?
And while we’re at it, do they slightly deflate their unicycle wheels too?