Shakespeare’s Shylock was more than a lender. / As a painter, he’d secretly render / full-length portraits of guys / that his daughter would prize, / and to whom she would gladly surrender. /// Daughter Jessica lusts after boys, / therefore Shylock developed some ploys. / With brush, canvas, and oils, / her libido he foils, / when she kisses the paintings, not goys.
She’d been told that watching paint dry/ could be fun – so she gave it a try. / and now dad is afraid/ that the subject portrayed/ is too low brow – or she is too high../// But wait!/ That’s a kiss she’s bestowed/ on the lips uniformed toad !/ Poor Daddy‘s aghast ! Has the die been cast ?/ Can this be the end of the road ?/// She was always the family jewel./ She was sent to finishing school !/ Will it all go to waste ? Will she marry in haste ?/ Could Fate really be so cruel ?/// And what of that nice Doctor, Herschel? Will he overcome forces inertial?/ Can you bear the suspense/ of this arrant nonsense ?/ Sorry, folks – here’s comes the commercial !
Papa, whatever shall I do? James has got stuck in the looking glass! Well, Alice, that is what comes of taking your little friends with you on your odd journeys.
He caught her when she thought she was alone/ She said she was admiring skin tone/He knew the real reason/ she was feeling in season/ He thinned his paints with AXE cologne.
I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. First work by this artist used here.
It all started as a miscontruement of ‘face paint’ to mean using one’s face to paint as opposed to the product, ending with a classic ‘face palm’ situation.
It was an amazing feet and she nose what she’s doing.
However, at the time this is being painted, the paint adjacent her nose has dried, locking the portrait onto Rachel’s face. Her attempts to escape merely drew the canvas from the easel.
Her larcenous roommate, Sandra Unshaven, is about to use Rachel’s dilemma to steal the ping pong paddles above the door.
The portrait is next to an open interior door. There is another interior door immediately behind the man. This must have been painted in the Tudor period.
BE THIS GUY almost 3 years ago
The old artist realized it was time that he let his daughter start dating.
Solstice*1947 almost 3 years ago
Shakespeare’s Shylock was more than a lender. / As a painter, he’d secretly render / full-length portraits of guys / that his daughter would prize, / and to whom she would gladly surrender. /// Daughter Jessica lusts after boys, / therefore Shylock developed some ploys. / With brush, canvas, and oils, / her libido he foils, / when she kisses the paintings, not goys.
Say What Now‽ Premium Member almost 3 years ago
Swipe left!
TonysSon almost 3 years ago
She craved aerosols but he only had oils and gave her the brush off.
harebell almost 3 years ago
All right, all right, I can take a hint. We’ll get you glasses!
Call me Ishmael almost 3 years ago
She’d been told that watching paint dry/ could be fun – so she gave it a try. / and now dad is afraid/ that the subject portrayed/ is too low brow – or she is too high../// But wait!/ That’s a kiss she’s bestowed/ on the lips uniformed toad !/ Poor Daddy‘s aghast ! Has the die been cast ?/ Can this be the end of the road ?/// She was always the family jewel./ She was sent to finishing school !/ Will it all go to waste ? Will she marry in haste ?/ Could Fate really be so cruel ?/// And what of that nice Doctor, Herschel? Will he overcome forces inertial?/ Can you bear the suspense/ of this arrant nonsense ?/ Sorry, folks – here’s comes the commercial !
Bilan almost 3 years ago
When Dad saw the way she was practicing her kissing, he knew that he’d better chaperone on the date.
orinoco womble almost 3 years ago
Jessica gives away her romance with Lorenzo at just the wrong moment. “End this strife” yeah right, Jess—it’s only just begun.
ronaldspence almost 3 years ago
How damsels kissed 2 dimensional celeb crushes before Tigerbeat!
pcolli almost 3 years ago
Stuck to the canvas….
Reader almost 3 years ago
Hey! No touching the merchandise!
Buzzworld almost 3 years ago
She dreamed one day she would marry a prints.
jdculhane46 almost 3 years ago
Lizzie will you finally admit that you need glasses?
lagoulou almost 3 years ago
Ish and Sol….no one can match you today!
rmremail almost 3 years ago
She’s practicing for 24 hour kissing contest
DM2860 almost 3 years ago
Charles is wondering if naming his daughter Galatea was a mistake.
prrdh almost 3 years ago
Gloria displays her magnetic personality by attracting the iron screw eyes on the back of the painting.
Linguist almost 3 years ago
Emily hoped the Pygmalion effect would work on this painting.
harebell almost 3 years ago
Papa, whatever shall I do? James has got stuck in the looking glass! Well, Alice, that is what comes of taking your little friends with you on your odd journeys.
Another Take almost 3 years ago
“You’re telling me that this is what you really look like but that you got the incantation backwards, Dorian? "
MuddyUSA Premium Member almost 3 years ago
On further inspection I notice you painted a pimple on my husband’s nose?
rmremail almost 3 years ago
Why is the frame tilted like that? Did dad make it so that his daughter could more easily kiss the painting?
Holden Awn almost 3 years ago
She’d have to wait a century to sext him.
Honorable Mention In The Banjo Toss Premium Member almost 3 years ago
Father came home unexpectedly early one day, and caught her at….. well, whatever it is.
Calvins Brother almost 3 years ago
Having a staring contest with a portrait is good practice.
KEA almost 3 years ago
Well, that’s my new thing for today. Didn’t know there was such a thing as “huff paint”
The Wolf In Your Midst almost 3 years ago
“For Heaven’s sake, Edith, at least have some standards! He’s just a corporal!”
Sir Isaac almost 3 years ago
Hmmmm Hmmmm….I just love fresh oil paint.
PoodleGroomer almost 3 years ago
He caught her when she thought she was alone/ She said she was admiring skin tone/He knew the real reason/ she was feeling in season/ He thinned his paints with AXE cologne.
anomaly almost 3 years ago
“No, ma’am. You don’t do a self-portrait by pressing your face in wet paint.”
Ken Holman Premium Member almost 3 years ago
Darling husband, you’ve missed adding the little mole that he has on his nose right next to his eye. It can be seen only very close up.
mabrndt Premium Member almost 3 years ago
The artist’s studio:
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Charles_Napier_Kennedy_-_The_artist%27s_studio.jpg
has info and links that point to more info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting.
Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image at
http://thatispriceless.blogspot.com/2021/11/masterpiece-2827.html
I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. First work by this artist used here.
schaefer jim almost 3 years ago
Funny toon!
StephenRice almost 3 years ago
Actually, she just ran out of lipstick.
6turtle9 almost 3 years ago
Hey lady! You kiss it, you buy it!
sparklite almost 3 years ago
It all started as a miscontruement of ‘face paint’ to mean using one’s face to paint as opposed to the product, ending with a classic ‘face palm’ situation.
It was an amazing feet and she nose what she’s doing.
However, at the time this is being painted, the paint adjacent her nose has dried, locking the portrait onto Rachel’s face. Her attempts to escape merely drew the canvas from the easel.
Her larcenous roommate, Sandra Unshaven, is about to use Rachel’s dilemma to steal the ping pong paddles above the door.
sparklite almost 3 years ago
The portrait is next to an open interior door. There is another interior door immediately behind the man. This must have been painted in the Tudor period.
sparklite almost 3 years ago
Sightseeing, it ain’t for the faint.
The unprepared tourists are quaint.
“I can see Paris!”
cried Kamala Harris,
before getting an Eiffel of paint.
sparklite almost 3 years ago
The gypsies Dad hired would water
down house paint when they hadn’t oughta.
The paint washed away
which is mor’en I can say
of the ‘date’ they had with his daughter.
d1234dick Premium Member almost 3 years ago
lucinda, was looking to see what daddy had painted, the picture of her husband to be,too bad she had horrible Eyesite and thought it was a horse.
Snoopy_Fan almost 3 years ago
Well,… he is tall, dark and handsome…"