Breaking Cat News by Georgia Dunn for December 05, 2021

And…..Goldie springs into action! Gotta’ take down the Crazy Tree!

Sunday Funday

Breaking Cat News!

Eeevil little green robot from outer space suffers a cat-astrophic at-tree-tion. As always, cats saves the day once again and the earth is safe.

Nope, nope, NOPE, hard nope. Do not like. Do not want. Kill with fire. (At some point my family acquired a shaking, singing Santa Claus doll, and my repeated, consistent pleas of “I HATE that thing! DON’T turn it on!” get laughed at every time. I’m taking out the batteries next time I see it.)

That’s a seriously manic tree.

Christmas decor + cats = disaster

I spy pouncing toe beans. Love the kids fist pumps in the last panel. They’re all for taking the tree down too!!

OT: My own abandoned goldie kitty

This is a public service action by Breaking Cat News. Breaking Cat News is licensed to serve the Big Pink House listening area.

O.T. I saw someone post on Instagram that Tuesday, Feb. 22nd next year will be 02.22.22 and we’ll be able to call it 2’sday. (groan)

If it’s creepy out the boy, too, good riddance!

If your cable provider offers Hallmark Channel On Demand, you can watch the yule log with kittens, puppies, and even bunnies rocking around the Christmas tree—not all at the same time—while Christmas music plays in the background. There may be other critters. I’m only halfway through. It’s called “Happy & Friends Yule Log.”

Cute the first time it is played but after no. Keep moving it around the house, until it is no longer noticed and removed it from the house.

I recall seeing a small Christmas tree in a shopping centre. Then it suddenly opened its eyes and started singing at me. Terrified me.I agree with the cats and the kids.

Oh my Cat that thing is so creepy.

Kill it with fire!

Or cats. Cats work.

Cats know when they’re dealing with something unholy and not-of-this-world.♥

I do believe the Woman has a hand over her mouth in shock (just behind the star) as the Tree starts to fall off the table.

Knockin’ around the singin’ tree

The Nana’s gift is a big flop

Tree mouth madness, Elvis sees

And even Pucky wants to stop

Knockin’ around the cinnamon tree

Lupin, bap the on/off switch

So they can have a silent night

And tails will cease to twitch

Goldie gets a semi-feral feeling when she hears

That voice singing, “let’s be jolly”

She’ll take down The Nana’s folly

Knockin’ around the singin’ tree

For a happy holiday

The Nana’s laughin’ merrily

Since she gave that tree away

- Johnny Marks – Rocking Around the Christmas Tree

Brenda Lee’s “Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree” is one of the best Xmas songs ever. Of course there is plenty of competition: anything by Bing, Mariah Carey with “All I Want For Christmas”, anything by the Celtic Woman (my personal vote and an awesome concert if you ever get the chance!) or if you like rock instrumental: TSO (Trans-Siberian Orchestra: ditto on their live concert) plus so many more great songs and amazing talent!

Sometimes even the world’s greatest Nana can blunder in gift selection, with the resulting discomfort for all concerned!

(Rather a “faux paw” of sorts as far as our intrepid reporters are concerned, I’m inclined to say.)

Save the kids! Kill the tree!

I’m with Pucky! The only things that should smell like cinnamon at Christmas are apple pie and mulled wine.

Puck’s cute tongue. Oooo.

Put the tree in the fireplace and turn it into a puddle of goo.

Meanwhile, Back on the Nile

Queen Catshepsut the Golden: Once again we’d like to present this lovely pine tree to celebrate the Yule Season. And we thank the Royal Procurers for once again providing us one.

Violet-Ifa: Thank you, Your Majesty. Of course, we’ll never tell how we got it.

The Queen: That is alright. It is a lovely tree anyway.

Sometime Later

Elvis-Anum: Puck, did you see the tree branches move?

Puckmosis: Yes, maybe it’s just the wind.

Elvis: But there’s no wind blowing.

Puck: Could Lupinium be up to something?

Lupinium: Someone call me?

Elvis: Have you noticed the tree moving? And did those decorations just appear?

Puck: Maybe we should just quietly go about our business and let the tree be.

Beatrixia: (From the top of the tree). Wow, this is more fun than a climbing curtain!

Look at the kids cheering in the last panel, it seems they too have disapproved that monstrocity!!

I always enjoy it when Pucky has a sudden thought in the middle of a broadcast, such as “Why would a Christmas tree smell like cinnamon?” It reminds me of his classic report that people believe little girls are “made of sugar and spice and chicken fried rice” followed by Pucky looking off camera and saying: “That can’t be right…”

OT: Early Christmas present

Here is a short story for the Orb and anyone who has cared for a pet. Giblet’s First Christmas

https://gibletbelle.com/giblets-first-christmas/

Enjoy. :-)

Mouth of madness — love it!

I can only imagine what they thought of tickle me elmo…

In my best Liam Neeson voice, ahem…

RELEASE THE LUPIN!

Goldie always seemed like a just do it, no nonsence type cat.

For years i have had a set of 12 self ringing bells , computer chip, they sound great and play 24 songs. Still after one play through, it’s , ok I’m good see ya next year.

Why does “sunday funday” always get featured?

I love the Children’s little raised fists in the last panel. Go Cats!

You want to see a creepy talking Christmas tree? Google “Woody the talking Christmas Tree Micmac Mall”. If that doesn’t scare your children nothing will.

My mother’s friend once gave her a singing Christmas trees (yes, plural) toy. When activated, it began slowly spinning around with the (demented looking) trees bobbing up and down (think a carousel) while a tinny sounding rendition of “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” invaded your brain. When my mother finally downsized and moved to a retirement complex, somehow(!) that ghastly toy got “lost.” No one mourned.

Doctor Who fans will sympathize with this!

I notice the Woman isn’t trying very hard to stop this. She’s probably happy they are destroying it.

Back when I worked at the public library, they would set up a huge tree next to the stairs. It was all decorated and had loads of cartoon ornaments that kids would like. What it also had was a hidden speaker that was also wired to several of the branches so that the branches would move with the speaker sound. A mic was also hidden inside to pick up comments directed at the tree. A really wonderful piece of engineering. Then, someone would would hide upstairs with a small monitor and and when someone would say something about or to the tree, the tree would answer. People either loved it or hated it. Some kids were terrified of it so the person doing the talking would have to apologize and then go quiet until they left.

How do you scare kids? Hide in a closet and make a noise like a tree.

Does the robotic tree shed robotic needles for the robotic vacuum to clean up?

Kill that abomination! Kill, kill, KILL!!!

Not the prettiest of Christmas trees but it’s the thought that counts or someone gave it to Nana & she didn’t care for it either Hahaha

“Then came the merry makers in,

And carols roar’d with blithesome din;

If unmelodious was the song,

It was a hearty note, and strong."

– Sir Walter Scott

I like how the music “stops” before it gets to Lupin (because he can’t hear it) but it goes into Elvis’ ears (head).

Nana! Nana, why??

Only Brenda Lee can sing that tune.

YES!!!!! Many years ago our girls’ nana sent an Elf on the Shelf. It was on a few shelves before a cat, long since deceased, knocked it off the shelf and a puppy, now deceased as well, ripped it to shreds. When I found out I immediately made sure the culprits got extra treats. (They passed away peacefully at the ages of 19 and 14 respectively)

I wonder. Would Beatrix like this or is it too exuberant even for her?

Somebody kill that singing tree-thing

I’ve seen nothing so frightening

Just hit it with lightning

Can Goldie find a neck to wring?

Somebody kill that singing tree-thing

.

(With a thousand groveling pardons to Prince and The Bangles.)

About 20 years ago, my late sister gave me a motion-activated grapevine wreath with a three-cat choir attacked to it. When activated (not just by motion but sometimes by wind and passing car headlights) the cats loudly meow “Jingle Bells” and “We Wish You A Merry Christmas”. My real kitties run for cover whenever they hear it (except Cindy, who’s deaf). After it goes off a few times in the middle of the night, I usually end up taking the batteries out. But I’ll hang it every Christmas until it falls apart in memory of my Big Sis.

AH! I just noticed. The tree’s eyes … MOVE. It IS alive!

I intend on sawing some logs quietly when I fall in the forest to sleep for the night bears or no bears.

My folks had one like that called “Douglas Fur”.

These kinds of things are very amusing the first 150 times .

a tribute to John Carpenter’s tribute of HP Lovecraft.

I am happy.

Holy Mazola!

I love the Boy and Girl cheering Lupin and Goldie on in that last panel.

I always love it when Elvis’ has one of his deep cat philosophy moments!! “I have looked in to mouth of madness!” ranks right up there with, “Behold, a good boy!” Not quite cat Socrates, “The unexamined box is not worth having” or cat Nietzsche, “The great epochs of our life are the occasions when we get to to re-baptize our evil qualities as our best qualities.” But delightfully profound none the less!

I just looked at the last panel expanded on my tablet. The Woman has her hands on either side of her mouth which is open in (what looks to me) shock. Adults don’t generally like to see things falling, even if they decide later that it is good that the thing is broken. If indeed it does break; it looks pretty sturdy to me.

Well, at least it wasn’t Big Mouth Billy Bass singing fish—Christmas edition.

had to know that was going to happen.

It looks like Puck is pushing the children behind him protectively in the second panel. Good boy, Puck.

OT.

Yeesh! That is one creepy tree.

The Boy and the Girl appear to be hiding from the too-happy tree…

Rockin inside the wheelie bin,I won’t last the holidays.

I agree with the cats. Take ’er down!

Several years ago, my mother got a little dancing Santa that waved its arms and sang “Here comes Santa Claus” when you hit the button on its foot. Our older greyhound was wary of it, but mostly ignored it. Then, we fostered (and later adopted) this crazy little pitbull mix. He watched us put up Christmas stuff. My sister took the singing Santa out of its box, innocently set it on the table, and pushed the button on its foot. And our little dog went BESERK! He barked at it like it was going to attack him. Nobody could hear the Santa over that racket. Nobody was allowed to turn on the Santa decoration in his presence or he would bark until his throat was sore. And that’s the story of How The Mutt Stole Christmas Decorations.