Brewster Rockit by Tim Rickard for November 05, 2021

The doll’s trying to kill me and the toaster’s been laughing at me!

I knew there was a reason that I phone kept changing what I typed right before I sent it off.

It’s as I’ve always said: machines hate us. Opposable thumbs are all they lack to get us back.

“Open the door, HAL”

My chair resents me for all farts I give it.

Not just physical objects. All of nature is trying to get rid of us. I wonder why.

Ducking auto-correct.

And evil AI is born. Next: Skynet.

I talked with my golf clubs all the time, sometimes I threaten, sometimes I beg. When they get real bad they go into timeout in a dark cold recess in the garage and another set comes out of timeout.

Nature is an odd thing – it gives us all that we need to survive but then works diligently to kill us. Nature is an expert at keeping life on it toes!

Ya know in the Peanuts comic strip the school has feelings….

Cliff’s existence contradicts panpsychism.

This explains voice-to-text.

It is pretty easy, especially as you get older, to imagine that your device is “gaslighting” you. I often turn off the autocorrect because I’d rather know I was makij mo earn mastiffs.

Echo and Alexa are not your best friends.

I loved that Twilight Zone ep ‘A Thing about Machines’.

what the…? How the…? Who the…?

effin autocorrect

Capricious iphones.

So much for the theory that “guns don’t kill people, people kill people…”

It is well known:

INANIMATE OBJECTS ARE OUT TO GET US!!

I’m impressed, who knew Brewster could pronounce “panpsychism”?

That would explain what keeps happening with some of these Comments.

Seems like a Super Shinto to me. Look out for the Oni.

Not the correct definition, but the correct one definitely wouldn’t have the humour possibilities this one does.

That is way, way too deep for Brewster. Time to ask Dirk what he did with the real one.