Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for November 17, 2014

You know you are old when everything either leaks or drys up.

And out comes the latex glove.

I think you mean DON’T show up.

50 is when your body starts to fall apart. Apparently the true life span of humans was 45, until modern medicine intervened.

And the great southerly hair migration begins.

Pun lovers, check out “Randolph Itch at 2am” It’s a great strip but I never see any comments on it.

Yea, the only thing Golden about the Golden Age is your…. wiz.

I knew I was no longer young when I discovered 20 years no longer seemed a long time to me. Now 50 years doesn’t seems all that long, so I guess I must have gotten old. When did that happen?!

At just 50, not much of anything should be gone (other than a woman having babies). Most people I know are in 60s or older (and I won’t date under 70) so I know we’re in much better shape than that.

You got me to laughing on this one.

The prostate ought to last at least as long as we do.

I resemble that remark!