Luann by Greg Evans and Karen Evans for April 29, 2017

Miss Deer, meet Mr. Headlight.

Wait. The TV thief and vending machine vandal is a she?

The mystery of the unmissing scarf is solved.

First 1st today

As most of us suspected, the penalty for Bernice having Piro in her room till midnight turned out to be nonexistent, thus making Piro’s attempted confession to protect Bernice just as irrational as it originally seemed.

Do we get to find out who the thief was?

I have a feeling that this is the end of this particular storyarc. We won’t find out who the thief was or why that scarf was left in the room, at least not for a while.

This is getting weirder all the time.

It’s unusual for a machine smasher and TV thief to be a “she”. But we know it’s not Tiff, because she’s in room 200, not 213.

Piro, and Bernice’s reaction to him, are still both major mysteries.

And the scarf is not Piro’s, so Dez threw a curve to Bernice on a bad assumption.

If anyone expected this arc to be finished today, it’s anything but. Mysteries abound.

Pretty much wasted today’s comic space.

Why does Director Lopez trust her so much?? Bernice has been pretty horrible at her job…abusing her power with Tiffany… Lying about the TV theft… Violating curfew etc. Nice twist with the scarf. Guess we’ll never know what girl stole the TV and Snax. Not the most satisfying wrap to this story arc. Hmm.. wonder what Toni and Brad are up to??

Wait a minute. Don’t slam that door shut just yet, there may still be a skunk in the woodshed. Why was the director’s scarf found at the scene? And, who is living in 213? The dorm cop recognized someone.

I love you Greg and have never complained but please don’t tell me this long arc is going to lead to nothing….it was all for nothing, really?!?!, Bernice hasn’t had a love interest since Zane common man

WHO STOLE THE TV AND WHO BROKE INTO THE VENDING MACHINE?!! YOU CAN’T SAY CASE CLOSED IF THAT’S THE ONLY THING WE’VE BEEN ASKING FOR, FOR THE PAST MONTH!!

I suspect that the thief is a character who has never been identified before in the strip, and probably will never be seen.

This isn’t “Agatha Christie’s Luann.” The dramatic purpose of the stolen TV and broken vending machine was apparently to throw suspicion on Piro albeit he would eventually be revealed as innocent. It apparently wasn’t for readers to consider all the suspects and try to guess who the criminal was. For all we know, Greg and Karen may not have even decided on a name for the criminal.

What they are really thinking:

Director Lopez says: Thanks for coming in, Bernice. Have a seat. Thinks: I bet she will talk about her curfew infraction in 5…4…3…2…

Bernice says: I’m sorry about the curfew infraction last night, Director Lopez! It won’t happen again! Thinks: I say it won’t happen again. Of course, Tiffany came in late and Dez came in late, but that’s not important. I must set an example for the rest of them.

Director Lopez says: Good. I trust you. But I wanted to tell you that we found the stolen TV. The vending machine thief had quite a stash of booty in her room. Thinks: Bernice has to know that students are coming in and out of the dormitory well after midnight. It is amazing that she continues to believe my story about a curfew is really true. Like any college campus has a midnight curfew. Ha! Ha! . How long can I keep it up? It makes me feel so bold I’ve started talking like a pirate. Booty. Arrgh! Pieces of eight.

Bernice says: Really? Wow! So, case closed? Thinks: My first detective case solved just like that. Now if I can just figure out who “vending machine thief” is. My clue is that she is in room 213. Did Director Lopez just say, “stash of booty”?

Director Lopez says: Case closed. Hey, where’d you get that scarf? I lost one just like it over winter break. Thinks: That’s definitely my scarf. I see my coffee stain on the neck. I wonder how long it will take Bernice to break down and confess it’s not hers. I love this little game of cat and mouse with Bernice. She’s sooo easy.

Bernice thinks: This must be her scarf. Why didn’t I figure this out before? I know it smelled like perfume, but I thought a cool guy like Piro might wear women’s perfume. Or does this tell me something more about myself? Am I attracted to homeless men who wear scarves that smell like women? I am so confused!!

From yesterday: @Luanaphile and @Argy.Bargy2:

Where in the world are you guys digging up this stuff, essentially that virtually all gay people know they are gay just about as soon as they hit puberty? Or that they don’t change directions later in life? Or that they’re never confused or uncertain about it? — Certainly not from planet Earth.

What about Kelly McGillis, who was married twice and had kids before deciding and declaring she was a lesbian? She then acknowledged having had such feelings since she was 12, but many people like her suppress or don’t know for a long time.

What about Bruce Jenner who, after being married more than once, transited to become Caitlyn Jenner?

Besides celebrities, I’ve been privy to a number of real-life stories of this sort. For one: A few decades ago I was on a dating service. I got in touch with a woman with whom there was tentative interest. We corresponded a bit, but I never met her. She told me that she had recently been spending time with another woman, realizing that seemed to be her primary attraction, and was slowly concluding that she was gay.

These are positively not isolated anomalies. This kind of thing happens all the time. So yes – a person like Bernice or Luann could, in fact, “go lezzie” even after thinking differently, well past puberty.

The only place those white-and-black, absolutist rumors to the contrary come from is a vile garbage dump of very rank politically correct wretchedness.

I’m not too crazy about fighting with people on here, but when someone calls me out, I’ll defend myself as needed.

The thief stole the TV four months ago and still has it? Pretty convenient.

So we’re never going to find out anything about why Bernice felt nothing when Piro kissed her, after she obsessed about him for so long?

Hmmm… Close one door; open another!

I remember college. Trying to make mature, grown up decisions and we were still kids. We made lots of bad decisions and we lived through it. We thought we fell in love and moved on. All without losing focus on our classes.But this has been the longest most drawn out, boring story arc. Please Greg and Karen, end it as fast and concisely as possible. Please.

I have this feeling that the person in 213 is Viper. I could be wrong, but I feel I am right.

ohhhh Dezzzzzz

Dez got Bernice to wear that scarf so that she could “swaddle herself in Piro’s essence”. Wonder what happens now that she has done so with Director Lopez’s instead.

Long two-week arc not to learn anything more about Piro, except that he had a speaking part. G&K let Bernice get away with some serious rule-breaking, so she will still be the hypocritical, obnoxious RA. Bernice is no more of a counselor than any of the other characters. It’s the Evans’ strip, but I think the commenters wrote a better story line. Bring out the cliche, all’s well that ends well. Perhaps a new mysterious twist with the Director’s scarf. But let’s go back to the club and see what Leslie Knox and Uncle Gray are doing.

I think we know who the thief is, and Ozzyozbrn74 above may have already called it… DEZ!

Well, if I had three guesses as to the identity of the thief, I think I’ve narrowed it down to:

1) It’s one of “the silhouette people” in the background (I’m sure many of them graduated to college!).

2) The Lone Ranger (okay, more likely his granddaughter, whose other famous ancestor was Robin Hood).

3) The daughter of the masked guy that the Monopoly Cop always throws in jail… Disguising herself as a college student.

-

Pretty solid leads, if you ask me! ….but if it’s not one of them- well, then, it’s anybody’s guess…

“The Call Of The Wild Goose Chase"

“You’ve Got A Muffler Problem”

“It’s Now Apparel, To Everyone!”

“It Began With A Scarf, It Will End With A Scarf!”

“It Wool Shock You, And Amaze You”

“Full Circle”

“He Stole My Heart, And I ‘Stole’ Your Scarf” (♩)

“Win, Misplace Or Show”

“I (Just) Left My Heart In A Pan O’ Crisco” (♬)

“Romanticis-ing The Stone” (♩)

“I Guess Love Is Just A Second-hand Emotion” (♪)

“It’s Knit What She Expected”

“April Showers Bring Macrame Flowers”

“All’s Well, That Cotton Blends Well”

“Where There’s A Will, There’s A Rayon”

“Who Was That Masked Woman?”

“Your Mystery Machine Is On The Fritz”

“Died In The Wool”

or

“Scarf Face”

Major let down!

Sooo, either Piro is actually in on it – or he accidently took a scarf that she forgot (or it simply wasn´t his scarf). But really, all Bernice has to say is she found it lying around.

Could be the stash was found in Tiffs’ room, trying to cover for Piro after hearing him confess. I don’t think she was all that crazy about college anyway.

I would have thought that the identity of the thief wasn’t going to be revealed, but the fact that they made it a “her” makes me wonder about that.

We know that the thief is female and very stupid, since she stole a TV from a dorm and kept it in her room in the same dorm.

So Bernice felt nothing when Piro kissed her but Bernice feels the love when she is wrapped in the scarf that belongs to another woman. Hhmm, interesting.

Could this mean that Dez is the culprit and gave Bernice the scarf with the intention to frame her?

The party never ends

Will Greg ever give Bernice any peace in her life. Her character’s beginning to sound like a cross between Nancy Drew and Nell Shipman.

Think fast Bern. Tell her that you found it. Don’t tel her where.

The thief could have also stolen Director Lopez’ scarf and then left it in the tv room. So Bernice should come clean about finding it.

Are we in some kind of weird time warp worm hole? Did we just skip a day or three? What happened to Bernice’s confliction? What happened to Dez’s swaddle therapy? What happened to essence of Piro? The Evanses have taken “deus ex machina” to new levels.

I wonder if we’ll ever see Luann in this strip again.

Maybe, Dirk had a sex change?

SO, Director Lopez left her scarf somewhere on the campus and forgot to fetch it when she left the area. Piro came to that area, saw the abandoned scarf, picked it up and then left it at Tiffany’s or Bernice’s. Happens. Well, Director Lopez, Finders, Keepers.

So the scarf belongs to Director Lopez. Des put a spell on the scarf when she draped it around Benice’s neck. Does this mean Director Lopez and Bernice are going to have an affair?

I don’t know if Bernice is coming out of the closet, or even gay for that matter. What does bother me is that Piro’s kiss didn’t register on her emotional meter. I think most people would feel something when kissed by an attractive member of the opposite sex, who appeals to them. Maybe just a little buzz, but we definitely feel something pleasant.

Well tomorrow it’s Puddles going out to poop – and I think Monday it’s a new story. I have to say, Greg & Karen certainly generated a lot of interest in this one. My thought for the next arc is Luann taking another step forward in her young life (but not with Jack).

“You’re FIRED! Now Get Out!!!” - What Director Lopez * SHOULD* have Said….,

I think Bernice will just leave the scarf on Ms Lopez’s chair at some opportune moment. I would do that or just give it to her right then and there. BTW, the placebo affect is real.. a neuro-psychological topic that Bernice can now start studying.

Since the thief will be arrested and expelled, if it’s Sun then that would save Greg from having to try to draw her again.

How did the thief get away with having the stolen TV (and other loot) in her room? Doesn’t Bernice periodically do her prison warden-style shakedowns of inspecting the rooms? I remember her telling Hair that he couldn’t have the drum set and some other things that she saw in his room. She comes to everyone’s room and knocks on the door at 10:00PM to make sure that all the windows are shut (believe me, I couldn’t make that up if I tried), right?

Actually, R.J.C., I think you’re right – Dez did it. (I even called it much earlier in the day than you did) And you may be right, too; the sweater is to frame Bernice for the theft!

@ NightGaunt49: Up until today, one might assume that the identity of the thief was unimportant. But today, we are told that it’s a she, so, suddenly, it’s important.

Not sure how I got wrapped up in this storyline. Oh, yes! I remember! Anyface showed up with the broken vending machine as his avatar on Dick Tracy, and he said just where he got it from.

As for me, this strip is showing just how fast the Dick Tracy story is building up!

Too bad Greg can’t come on here, and like the writer in that Woody Allen movie, tell some people “That’s not what I meant at all! You obviously don’t get what I intended!”. LOL!

I hope this comic strip take trip to unknown

Dez? I hope we find out Monday!

The irony is palpable in the office of Director Lopez.

Will we not ever learn the name of the Thief in 213? Will she remain anonymous?

Bernice built up feelings for Piro based on nothing. Eager to hold on to the fantasy, she takes the scarf and wears it. I would think it wouldn’t smell of him, but I guess she didn’t care, or didn’t have it on long enough to notice. The kiss did not happen in a way that Bernice had imagined it would, so was let down.

I expect we will see Bernice and Piro together again exploring.

I was hoping for a romance for Bernice and Piro… at least for a while.