Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 29, 2020

In all my years in NYC, I’ve never eaten at Applebee’s. I’ve drank there, but I’ve never eaten there.

I think Pig represents a certain type of traveler.

I recently moved to a new state and I mainly go to places that I’m familiar with from where I moved from. It’s a process.

If he eats at all those Applebee’s (or even a few), he WILL be broken inside.

Pig will visit the various establishments and try their pork ribs

I remember my mother (in the 1950s and 60s) commenting about how much she appreciated the national chain restaurants when we traveled. Because as she said “They are so reliably mediocre!”. Of course we were traveling to visit something, some place, or someone of interest, not for the sake of the reliably mediocre food.

I must be the only one who was trying to figure out how the 3rd panel could be a pun that I didn’t understand. Then it dawned on me that it was real dialog. Duh!

Pig’s plan might be more rewarding if he went to other countries. According to “Pulp Fiction”, you can order a beer at any McDonald’s in Paris, to wash down your Royale with Cheese.

Visiting all those franchises is a dirty job, but somebody’s got to do it. Why not Pig? Have him write a report on his experiences.

I just love Rat’s remark!

pig would get on well with the dinette set crowd…

From the comments I’m guessing that Applebees is some kind of restaurant franchise… Are we fortunate or unfortunate never to have experienced them in Europe…

I remember October 1974, the first McDonald’s opening in London. My American girlfriend, at the time, was suitably impressed…

Only a quick glance at the final panel, realising Stephan was not featured, I expected it NOT to be a pun…

I was in NYC once during The Festival Of Odors.

Wherever I travel I take a photos of Starbucks, send them to a friend and tell her I am not going in as I am searching for the perfect espresso.

Pig you will need a 2020 tour shirt made up of all the cities you visit. POW (Pig On Wheels) on the front and the City with date on the back ;-) … Croc Power !

Pig is a piggy bank someone has broken into and emptied!

The benefits of a homogeneous culture. And we export that crap all over the world.

When you get to Riverdale, check out Weatherbee, Pig.

This idea isn’t so original…in Canada, people do the tour of Tim Horton’s!

I actually get slightly angry whenever I see the Applebee’s near Times Square. At least the one in Harlem shut down.

So, now he’s got a plan…

Applebee’s in the Big Apple?

I thought this was going to be a pun setup for a moment.

I don’t get it…

PIG needs guidance…he’s so lost…..wheres Pigita when he needs her….

Actually, Pig can have New York. Outside of the Theater district, there’s nothing there that I am interested in seeing again. Been there, done that… New Year’s in Times Square 3 times, been to the top of the State of Liberty and the Twin Towers, … I’ll leave it to others from now on.

When Pig gets back from his Applebee’s tour the gang will give him a Chili’s reception.

When my bro, wife and nephew came to visit us here in the midwest from California, the nephew made a comment that there’s a Waffle House in every town out here. I frankly had never noticed, but now it’s a bit of a joke- I go looking for the Waffle House in every town. And the Dollar General. And the Walgreen’s. Homogeneous midwest towns.

This is why when I go somewhere, I try my best not to eat at chain places. I try to find the mom and pop places that offer something different and have that something special.

Some folks like to get away

Take a holiday from the neighborhood

Hop a flight to Miami Beach or to Hollywood

I’ll take a Greyhound to Applenees everytime

I’m in a spare ribs state of mind

Apoligies to Billy Joel

There was a time when my job took me back and forth from New York to various European cities on average of once or twice a week. Friends used to say they envied me for being able to visit all those wonderful cities – London, Rome, Amsterdam, Paris etc. The truth was that usually, all I saw was the inside of a hotel. My sightseeing was done from the taxi going back and forth from the airport.

I was sure there’d be a joke in there about the Big Apple.

Traveled with a friend to LA and spent a day on Venice Beach. At lunchtime, we had to pass by all the funky little restaurants and find a Burger King because he said “I want to know what I’m getting!” Better the dreck you know than rolling the dice, I suppose.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – the 3 worst things that ever happened to the US are McDonald’s, WalMart, and the Interstate Highway System.

then there is the couple who’s bucket list included eating at every Cracker Barrelhttps://www.tennessean.com/story/life/2017/08/27/couples-remarkable-quest-eat-every-cracker-barrel-country-just-one-left/548923001/

An outstandingly phenomenal restaurant doesn’t have enough memorable segments for a story as a truly bad restaurant.

What, no NY pizza??? Pig, really missed out

I’d never go to a chain restaurant in New York City. I always go to authentic places.

I always saw my retirement agenda as owning a Florida double-wide. “Snowbirding” in October, down I-95 in a Mercury Grand Marquis, wearing a Members Only zipper jacket, Hush Puppies, and a “sports-car cap”, stopping at a Cracker Barrel every evening for Catfish. “La Vita e Bella” !

As a kid, I had a map that showed the location of every McDonalds in America. Drove my parents bonkers. And, no, I wasn’t born in 1896.

Sort of like the tourists who go to Japan only to go to the Disneyland there.

One memorable time I went to Applebees was when I was walking and listening to the last quarter of a Seahawks game on the radio a few years ago. They lost the game and their postseason was over, and I saw dozens of sad fans storm out of Applebees all at once. I had the place to myself.

Everytime I come back from traveling overseas I like to tell people: “Yeah I had some McDonalds and waited in traffic a lot and watched a lot of TV.” Of course, all of that is true.

This reminds me of an old Trucker’s joke:“Q: How do you know when you are in a really remote part of the country?” A: “It takes you over 30 minutes to drive to a Mall-Wart!”

I avoid Applebees. I avoid chain restaurants …

Applebees?! No way. If IHOP, OK.

Accidental Tourist

We loved Shoney’s when I was a kid. Great strawberry pie or Chocolate Fudge Cake. It was the height of “going out” with my family. Pretty fancy. Either that or several of the drive inns or little hole in the wall cafes we had in our town.

Unfortunately there are folks exactly like Pig. Hundreds, if not thousands, of things to see and do in each state and all they want to do is visit a chain resturant.

The United Nations should be first stop for anyone sightseeing in NYC.

And they had this amazing new menu item called “Riblets!”

Pig is probably like 9-year-old-me after I’d gone to a diner on a class trip to Florida. When I got back I gushed to my parents about the “gourmet food” I’d had- an amazing soup with tiny hamburgers in it, and a layered pastry with fruit and fancy squiggly frosting.

In hindsight, I think kt was Chunky Sirloin Burger and one of those danishes like you see in vending machines. And I think Pig’s capable of finding his Applebees just as magical.

Can’t speak to Applebees—never set foot in one. But in the European capital city I used to visit regularly (you can probably guess which), the menu at the big central McDonald’s was the same as in the US: no concessions whatever to local tastes or preference. For those, you had to go a few doors down.

Pig is just being his timid, non-adventurous self….

I remember my coworker and I went into a Ruby Tuesday near St. Louis MO. When we got seated, the Stones came over the intercom performing “Ruby Tuesday”, and we started singing along. Soon, nearly everyone in the restaurant joined in.

Mom and I once ate at the Hard Rock Cafe in Canada. We’d been sightseeing all morning and were just looking for a place to eat lunch.

Usually when I travel to the USA (I live in southern Canada) I go to Grand Forks, eat, shop, swim, sleep, and leave. It takes a grand total of 8 hours to drive there, 8 hours to drive back, and including sleeping at night, i spend a whole 11 hours there.