Herman by Jim Unger for October 20, 2020

I see that your waist has moved up to your aim pits.

I stopped increasing my pants size when I reached 39 inches.

I put my husband on a diet when he started griping about needing bigger jeans. Larger than size 38/40 waists were more expensive and harder to find. I explained this to him and I get no more griping. :D

Empire waist, no less.

At least he went up. Most I see go down becoming hip huggers with an over hang.

In 1985, I had a “mess dress” (formal military uniform) tailor-made for me on one of my trips to Korea. It still fits. My wife is ready to kill me.

The doc sez, I’m getting closer to my high school physical stats, and that’s a good thing. My wife sez my brain is, too, but not much good comes of it.

Those pants, however, is still not going to feel the same

I don’t think he needs a belt…

That maybe true, but that 32 inseam ain’t gettin it.

A 30 inch if he belts it at the knees. Fashionable in the hood but tends to get police attention in the suburbs.

Next, you’ll be measuring it around your head.

Either the zipper isn’t long enough, or he’s got ’em on backwards.

It works for guys only.. women aren’t that lucky and keep growing in that area

It’s not the waist, it’s the butt!

His chest just fell.

I assume he has just changed the number base used and now in something like Hexadecimal which would make it 52 base 10

He says with a voice like Tinkerbell.

and you still look incredibly sharp

High pockets. Even worse are low pockets, the ones that pull the pants down under their belly and l and let it hang over.

SSSSSSAAAAAMMMM!!! You didn’t make the pants too long!! And, he’s trying to be Charles Nelson Reilly. No socks.

He’s wearing his butt backwards…