Close to Home by John McPherson for March 04, 2021

“‘Unplug the launch controller, wait and plug it back in again?’ Damn it Jim-I’m a space jockey, not an IT guy!” ;D

If this is Elon Musk’s Space X then it probably needs yet another software update.

We will soon be serving roast Bleeb.

Oh, here’s your problem. It wasn’t plugged in to begin with.

Oh, now I get it, that mischievous Bleeb pulled the plug.

I was a recording tech on a rocket engine test in the ’60s. The sequence was mixed up and the leader simply restarted without thinking. Unfortunately some fuel was released into the chamber where the fun happens. The restart caused the loudest and most destructive event that I ever experienced in person. Fortunately the bunker contained the blast. I had all the data recorded up to the time all my transducers were destroyed.

By the way guys, don’t give it a worry but you might want to do the same with your oxygen supply too.

Really bad places to be for a rocket launch. Say goodnight, Gracie.

And they say we’ve put a man on the moon, ah right.

Or you could blow into the cartridge….

Better check the battery first. May need a jump start.

amazing how that really works!

A space shuttle?

Did you find this one under a drawer?

Our igniters stopped working, so we’re going to send Bob the janitor out there to hold up an Aim-n-Flame…

Bleeb’s fine. He is the reason for it not launching, y’know…

Ah yes. The early days of the Microsoft Missile Program. They never did get it off the ground before it got copied and marketed by Google and Oracle.

Sounds like my TV service mchsi.com

Italian Space Force, built by Fiat. Call Luigi, see if he workin’ today.

Apparently my cable company has gone into the space business.

Run out there with a flashlight and shine it up into the exhaust tips and try to see if there is a clog…

“Ah crap! This is bad! This is bad! Wait, I know what to do! Hit the space bar!”

“But, Captain… is this really the time for a drink?!”

“Not that space bar, you idiot… the one on the keyboard!”

“Nothing, Sir! It didn’t work!

“Wait a minute! Here it is… here’s the problem! This weird little micro mini USB thingy was unplugged from that wonky-lookin’-brick-adapter-whatchmacallit-thingy over there!”

“We’re are good to go, sir!”

We may have to run a temporary cable to the launch site across the street.

The scary part is that the elevator goes to the solid rocket booster instead of the orbiter.

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

I’m sure glad I don’t man the IT Helpline at NASA…

Powered by Windows, clearly.

That is typical Bleeb! Always looking up at things he shouldn’t! :>)

This time leave it unplugged for a full minute before replugging it in.

If the main rocket finally catches, Bleeb is gonna be toast!

Bleeb you naughty boy, what have you been up to?

Get a matchbook.

The Space Shuttle, if it were designed by Microsoft.