Pickles by Brian Crane for May 11, 2021

If you watch enough of the Dateline and other true crime dramas, you will never commit murder. Frensic science is too smart for us mere mortals.

well, la-dee-da, Earl

Just random thinking about possiblities; what if?…

Let her know you dropped the life insurance.

She just like to keep him shaky about their marriage.

Opal is just keeping you on your toes Earl .

When she asks what you are thinking, she’s hoping in the heart of her romantic soul that you are thinking about some time you’ve spent together.

Earl, you should really become concerned when she starts watching Midsomer Murders.

I used to hate those “What are you thinking?” pop quizzes. They often happened when trying to fall asleep, or while just sitting there and enjoying the moment.

Now you’ve got me a little concerned, Earl…since my sister (who lives in the same house as I do) does the same thing…

Sorry , i forgot about Muffin .

Could be worse. She could watch “Oprah” and “The View”, both of which are crimes against the thinking person.

The interrogator asks: ""What are you thinking?’’

She assumes he’s actually thinking, truth is, his brain is just sitting there, like a car idling at the kerb.

Could be worse… my wife is a fan of Scandinavian murder mysteries.

Earl had better start sleeping with one eye open.

Maybe women think those true crime and investigation shows could be better than on the job training.

Stop wondering, Earl! Opal is always thinking about what to make for dinner or if she should go to the fabric shop….

This explains it all:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3XjUFYxSxDk

Learn to sleep with one eye open Earl..

I’ll respond to reasonable questions but my thoughts are my own.

The more they know the better they think they can control you.

Poor Earl!

When we say “oh nothing”, we mean it.

Earl you do not need to worry. For us we watch prime time crime drama for entertainment. The make up artists on actor’s work really hard.

I love Dateline and other true-crime shows. I also read true-crime and murder mystery fiction. I could never even think about killing anyone unless my life—or the life of a loved one—was being threatened, and there was no other alternative. My interest in this kind of thing is twofold. (1) I love to see how detectives go about trying to solve a murder. (2) I’m interested in the psychology of the type of mind of anyone who would kill another human being. What causes some people to resort to murder while most others in the same set of circumstances, wouldn’t even think of doing that?

Apparently if I watch the news the thing I should be wondering about whether someone is randomly planning on murdering me?

If she starts smiling when those “you-can’t-be-turned-down” life insurance commercials come on, RUN!

What are you thinking? Nothing! As it is written, “Men think about nothing, women talk about nothing.”

“Do I want to make it look like an accident or make it look like he just left? Hmmm. He lives until I decide. He’s already had extra decades because I haven’t picked yet.”

Actually there aren’t any true-crime shows on TV. You can’t find true anything on TV.

If Opal has been watching true crime then she’s much more likely to be worried that Earl is thinking about offing her! Many, many more husbands kill their spouse/families than women

I don’t ask my husband (or anyone else) what they are thinking! I might ask what he thinks about a particular topic or something but no just randomly asking “whatcha thinking about?” I find it annoying to be asked that question and I figure that he probably doesn’t care to be asked it either