That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for November 17, 2021

This was the page’s chance at the big time.

I’ll trade you the helmet for the cod piece.

Dad’s armor wasn’t just physical, it was also emotional.

Here’s your helmet, sire. it’s COVID proof

Sir Beauregard enjoys one last lungful of fresh air before putting on his helmet, where all he will smell for the next six hours is the garlic sausage he had for lunch

To Alfonso, was it a disgrace / that his page tried to cover his face? / Did the kid underwhelm / him, presenting his helm? / Al won’t say, he just stares into space. /// Calm Alfonso keeps holding his pose / with his forehead in light, so it glows. / In this portrait by Titian / poor Alfonso is wishin’ / he could scratch that damned itch on his nose.

Hipster and son back from trick or treating in Brooklyn…

Your Topper sir! I had the sweatband scraped and clean. It was getting a bit of a cheesy smell.

This man has a face full of Brillo/ and I have this damned peccadillo:/ I must write something “clever”/ before I may ever/ put my poor poll to rest on my pillow../// I’m a slave to the “Priceless” addiction/ and it’s causing a measure of friction/ ‘twixt my need for some rest/ and my need to contest/ with my fellow “wits”, each day’s “depiction”./// So this pic of a lad and his “pater”/ (though the artist be one of the greater)/ for the ”critic’s appraisal”/ of these eyes (blue- not hazel)/ will just have to wait until later…zzzzz

Munchkin photobomb.

Daddy, is this what you meant in that talk about about men wearing protection?

“Excuse me Sire, but the rent is due on the suit of armor.”

Why does a bathroom pain always hit at such an inconvenient time?

Good old Al had a fabulous meal/But his bladder and bowel’s getting real./He would love to go pee/it’s a problem you see/Cuz old Al is all dressed up in steel.

If we could just burrow in/ through the bristles, and garments of tin/ we would find underneath/ some very bad teeth/ and a downright absurdly weak chin !

Though Junior thanks dad is a god/ we all know he’s really a clod./ He’s imposed on poor Titian/ an impossible mission:/ a great portrait – but it’s all a facade.

Go ahead, kid, punch me in the stomach. Give it your best shot, as hard as you can.

If I’m honest I’ve got to admit/ that this bugger would scare me a bit/ I’m a cowardly sort/ (fight my battles in court):/ if he scowled, I would “lose my sh** ”../// In his times, we’d have all been adrift/ Very few have the wonderful gift/ of defeating each rival/ in the fight for survival/ (and his broadsword how many could lift ?)/// So be glad you were born when you were/ (be you either a him or a her)/ for you needn’t demean/ yourself to a Queen/ (though you may call your customer “Sir”)…/// (afterthought: ) I have always assumed it was plain/ I was born to be Charlemagne/ but I got to the station/ late by sixty generations/ and somehow I just missed that train…

Mister, can you spare a dime?

Dad, why have you got Momma’s pasties on your shoulders?

“Does this tickle?”

“Now that I’ve got this thing on, I can’t move. What was I thinking?”

Alfonzo stayed up all night / to get his formal suit looking right / So cut him some slack / You can’t see the back / It’s really still a fright.

It must be really cold in that room.

Hey big man, Let me hold a dollar

“Your helmet, sir. Without it no one will recognize you.”

Sorry sir, I can’t see your face from here and that armor breastplate looks from this angle as if it is for a woman.

Portrait of Alfonso d’Avalos, Marquis of Vasto, in Armor with a Page: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Titian_(Tiziano_Vecellio)_(Italian)_-_Portrait_of_Alfonso_d%27Avalos,_Marquis_of_Vasto,_in_Armor_with_a_Page_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg 

has info and links that point to more info about this painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image at 

http://thatispriceless.blogspot.com/2021/11/masterpiece-2828.html 

I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. So far, 16 works, by this artist, have been used here (17 times, including one repeat). 

https://www.gocomics.com/that-is-priceless/2018/08/02?comments=visible 

has the prior (the here links in my blog entry comment point to the artist info URLs in my comment there, plus a few more).

The TSA will have a field day with this guy

Alfonso, suffering from the effects of letting his RuPaul Chia Pet* sleep on his face, takes up armor as a prophylactic against further infection.

In doing so, he not only foreshadows the front end of decades of Buicks, but became the first to weaponize squirting daisies.

*It’s a real thing!

looks good, ready for battle or, a photo

He is just a young whelp/Who is trying to help/and he polished that armor all night/he was promised a treat/when he finished the feat/but so far, his boss ain’t done him right!