Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for July 08, 2022

Good evening, one and all! Here’s an oldie, but a goodie…or maybe just an oldie. Who knows? Here goes:

A man needs a job, so he applies at the local zoo. “We don’t have any openings for a zookeeper at the moment,” he’s told. “But our gorilla just died, and he was our main attraction. How about we pay you to put on this gorilla suit and pretend you’re the gorilla?”

Well, the man is desperate, so he takes the job. Soon, he grows into his rôle, and he’s jumping around, thumping his chest. Unfortunately, the gorilla head he’s wearing impairs his sight, and one leap takes him over the fence and into the lion’s pit. As he lies on the ground, dazed, he sees the lion coming toward him, closer and closer… He begins screaming, “Help! Help me!!”

When the lion gets to him, it opens its mouth…and says, “Shut up! Are you trying to get us both fired?”

According to this article most of the cells in our body are non-human microbial cells including bacteria, viruses and fungi that live on and in us, if anyone cares to look at it.

https://www.sciencefocus.com/the-human-body/human-microbiome/

based upon the pictures, who floods the bathroom during a shower (with the curtain drawn) and what do the hieroglyphics say?

The Egyptian “pregnancy tests” were, as far as I’m aware, totally ineffective, and involved peeing on a mix of seeds and planting them. If the seeds grew, you’re pregnant, and the type of plant determined what kind of kid you’d have.

Strangely enough, they did have nearly everything needed for a pregnancy test, since injecting the urine of women into frogs and seeing if it induced ovulation in the frog was the most common method of testing it for the first half of the 20th century, and that actually did work.

I’d be very interested to learn how pregnancy tests were done 3300 years ago!

And I guess I’m above average at something! My showers are longer than eight minutes.

She’s reaching into the toilet for… ???

i once transferred 90 million bacteria during a 11 second kiss

Unless of course if you are kissing my butt then the total multiplies by a million or so. I’m not totally sure here so obviously I could use some help.

Early Egyptian pregnancy test: “if she delivers a baby… she was pregnant.” :D Later on, they devised a modern method: " woman that falls like a domino trying to dance like an Egyptian in the marketplace is probably pregnant." Oh ay oh ;P

Their pregnancy test involved digging in the toilet?

My wife walked in to our bedroom in a huff earlier after coming out of the shower.

“Dave, can you remember to shut the curtains please. I’m getting changed and the neighbours can see in” she said angrily.

“Don’t worry babe”, I replied. “If the neighbours see you naked they’ll be sure to shut their own curtains”.

So that’s why I’m sleeping in the car tonight.

Until next time.

What in the world does an Egyptian toilet have to do with a pregnancy test?

Is that an electrical cord running into the shower?

The best pregnancy test is time.

Take care, may famed bacteria counter Gertrude “One More Little Kiss And We’ll Have The True Number And More Cowbell” McSlobberord be with you, and gesundheit.

The Egyptians were pretty advanced with medical tests. I think they also tried brain surgery in the 4th dynasty

A shower lasts only an average of eight minute? Here in MD they last at least 15 minutes! I hate it when I have to run from my car to the front door of Applebee’s!

Bacteria is not an issue. We are covered in bacteria, some actually protect your skin from infection. It’s pathogens or pathogenic bacteria, meaning any that cause illness.

The Egyptian pregnancy tests were surprisingly accurate too:

https://historyofyesterday.com/ancient-egyptian-pregnancy-test-f0a9cebaac1b

Is that a toilet cleaner?

Much rainwater around the shower tub.

I suppose love is slop and filled with risk as some say, but the risk is worthwhile.