Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 26, 2022

The Washington Generals

Pig is actually better adjusted than those people who want everyone to get a first-place medal, including the ones who didn’t even try.

Scape-pig.

Suddenly Pig is doing his best “Washington Generals” imitation!

What can you beat me at? Let me count the ways.

at least Pig is showing a bit of Good Sportsmanship.

The plaque will read:

The World’s Most Spoiled Bacon.

Rat is not worried about the easy win.

Winning for losers.

A winner in life means someone has to lose? Not exactly an American belief.

Pig deserves a “Participation Ribbon”.

Declining participation

Congratulations Rat on …

Something of a modern-day sin eater?

Life doesn’t have to be a zero-sum game Pig.

Don’t worry about winning, do the best you can and you will find you excel at something eventually!

“Everybody loves a winner, so no one loves me…..”

The Jets, Jags and Lions already do that in the NFL, ditto for the Orlando Magic and Detroit Pistons in the NBA.

I’ve been performing Pig’s function for seventy-plus years. Never realized it was a good thing.

That was already done 2000 years ago by someone named Jesus.

Life’s not a zero sum game.

A true winner works hard and plays by the rules.

I find the whole brouhaha over “participation trophies” absurd. Who cares if kids get participation trophies? They’re just a little sign that they participated and contributed to the team. Then I hear silly arguments that trophies are only for winners, and that giving trophies to non-winners doesn’t prepare them for life because in real life, there are winners and losers.

Well, in real life, everyone gets a participation trophy at work. It’s called a paycheck. Not everyone does as well as everyone else, but everyone contributes and thus gets their “trophy.”

If we wanted kids sports the REALLY prepare them for real life as adults, we’d give giant trophies to select kids before they ever kicked/threw/hit a ball, give other trophies to kids who did nothing, and give the smallest trophies (or no trophies) to kids to did all the work.

Aww sweet Pig, you mean well, but you can’t lose enough to make someone else win. Just like you can’t get sick enough to make someone else healthy.

Pastis WINS for best comic of the day.

Only in America is the phrase, “making money” a thing. No other culture has embedded the idea that you can “make” money and increase the wealth of your country more than in America.

A RAT is a RAT, is a RAT

I don’t think someone has to lose to make a winner. I mean… Jeff Bezos makes lots of money (win) while we get cool technology in Alexa products (win).

It’s really not whether you win or lose. Be honest. . .it’s how you play the game. Did everyone have a good time? Then, mission accomplished. Perception is important. Sometimes you can actually win by losing.

Where schadenfreude becomes shoddy fraud

Trophies make everybody feel good, and they don’t cost much either!

But what about the others “FEELINGS AND SELF ESTEEM”?

Life is not a zero-sum game.

When I was coaching youth soccer, I’d always tell my players at the start of the season that all I wanted from them was to do their best and have fun, win or lose. I did, however also comment that winning was much more fun than losing! (and they did win a lot more often then they lost)

Everybody – except Pig – wants to rule the world!

Pig is my favorite and he went too far this time.

I wanted to become a professional scapegoat, get paid to take the blame…but it didn’t work out and I only have myself to blame.

You can tell this comic strip is written by a lawyer.

Now I want to name a band Altruistic Pig

Okay, now I just want to give Pig a hug.

Well, personally, I like non-zero-sum games better than John Forbes Nash’s Equilibrium. As a manager having to cross picket lines just took too darn long to finish bargaining.

We don’t believe that in this Nation or did not. Did we all lose at one moment in time? We need to get back on the winning track, so we all, can win once more.

Wait, you have to volunteer for that of your own free will? I got ordered to do that! Hope you all enjoy your winning.

Pig can be a useful tool. Or was that fool?

How nice! Pig has joined my club!