B.C. by Mastroianni and Hart for December 14, 2022

Better than saying “I got drunk last night and woke up like this this morning”.

… at sea.

So would you call that a tortoiseshell turtle, or a tortoisesail turtle?

Does that make him a hybrid? (don’t want to know where you plug in the charger cable)

Christopher Tortungus.

“Better mileage.”

Only if the wind’s blowing the way you want to go. (I see no lines.)

“Why do we look like little dinosaurs in army helmets”

“Shh!”

“Wait. Lemme turn around and show you my rudder.”

“NO!”

What!! No solar panels?

Well…… Looking at them, they seem to use green-energy.

Every little bit helps. He’s probably shaved off 2 seconds from his best time walking to the store a half-block away.

Whichever way the wind blows…

Run the Skull and Cross Bone up the mast and plunder ye neighbors shell. Yip yip yip yip yip

I see…a shell sail…

A Sailback sea turtle?

Their shells are almost impenetrable. Good luck

This is only helpful in the direction of the wind, which may send him far afield of his local Shell.

Only better mileage if the wind is blowing in the right direction

Could have a bit of trouble in a head wind.

Should have tied the sail to his tail and eaten a couple of cans of beans with a few beers to wash them down.

As if it makes a difference.

Go for it. It’ll probably work better than that racing stripe painted down your tail. Wait. That is paint, isn’t it?

He has a cousin with a propeller shell, another with a parachute shell,… then there’s his cousin Skimpy, he’s just really light.

And keeps that freeloading bird of his back as a bonus.

Great mileage is you’re going with the wind. Of course, you could use tacking.

Hybrid Model!

He’s gone hi-tech!

The autopilot is a great feature. He can just sit back and watch TV

The hare will complain he’s cheating