Rubes by Leigh Rubin for June 04, 2023

Aha. Just what the alien astronut theorists had always suspected!

You’ll be hungry in a lightyear.

It’s moo goo bed pan. You know how that Chinese food goes through you.

They better have some left for the Supreme Commander.

Get takeout on the planet. Gotcha boss!

Hmmm, tastes just like snorkfrazzle from back home.

Bet the orange chicken was delicious though

And Chinese takeout can become highly addictive.

Don’t worry, the way things are going the inhabitants will take care of it themselves.

willful mistranslation — very handy sometimes

Takeout is good for what’s alien ya’.

To serve man?

Maybe our fast foods will save us.

Before you can takeout a planet, you have to earn your chopsticks.

Everybody loves Chinese take-out, Panda Express…

Could’ve put the planet in a giant trash can. Or dated it.

And – just when it looked like the planet Earth was safe, one of the aliens discovered the carryout order had forgotten the egg rolls…Rage and tragedy ensues.