Pickles by Brian Crane for July 20, 2023

I’ll have to go with, Opal on this one, Earl.

That IS a great idea.

I’ve got to agree with Opal on this one.

Put it close enough and he won’t even have to leave the bed.

She wants a bidet

Quite a few years ago, I was working on a Korean War era VA home owned by a guy who used to be a tail-gunner. I needed to turn off the power to the kitchen, so he showed me the fuse-box (yeah, fuses) which turned out to be right beside his workbench in the garage. There was one end of a cut off garden hose through the wall there, with a cork in it. Which he explained, was as close as he could get to the way the tail gunners relieved themselves in flight. And saved him a lot of steps per project… At his invitation, I stepped into the back yard and found that he’d actually drilled a hole in the sewer pipe, and the other end of the hose was tightly fitted into that hole.

I still don’t know why Earl wears his glasses to bed.

I agree with Pearl.

I like it!

Folks with “outhouses” used to keep a “thunder mug” in the bedroom.

Maybe Opal will agree if Earl uses the name of the bed bottle thing for men we commonly use in Germany: Ente = duck…

When did they switch sides of the bed?

Our master bath is just behind the door in our room. Of course by today’s standard it is a closet, but still…..

All those great men (except maybe Einstein, but look where his ideas lead the world) had a chamber pot under their bed. What’s YOUR argument, now Opal?

Put in the whole shebang.

Or better yet: just move to the bathroom!!

Sorry Earl, she won’t stand for it……

It’s 0300 and Earl is still complaining about something. I’m surprised Opal stopped with just a 3-letter word.

I still stay Gutenberg was wrong when he said “Police Academy” was a good idea.

He may have to add a second bathroom to the house.

Guess the same goes for older men with a bladder issue…

Beats wearing Depends every night to bed…

It’s not only great men who receive criticism. Idiots receive it also. Heck, average guys too.

In the 1950s when I was young, my grandparents had a cabin with an outhouse, at night there was always a pee-pot next to the bed to save a trip outside!

A French army officer who visited Beethoven during the occupation of Vienna later wrote a description of the composer’s living room, which was pretty much in disarray (Beethoven was rather a slob at home). He mentioned seeing an unemptied chamber pot under the piano, adding “I’m not making this up.”

Actually that is something that you may find in many bathrooms in upscale homes in Asia.

One of my friends a long time ago , after a night out playing poker got out of his bed and opened the dresser drawer a " peed " in it . His wife Kathy was not impressed at all : (

In one of the episodes of the old Tool Time show, Tim Taylor was building a “man’s bathroom” and proudly displayed a tip-out self-flushing urinal built into the wall. Hinged at the bottom it was flush with the wall but when you opened it it became a urinal, plumbed into the standard toilet drain pipe. When you closed it the urinal was sprayed with water to clean it. I’ve looked but haven’t found a supplier for anything exactly like that but some plumbing fixture manufacturers do have home urinals.

If you search a bit you might find the web page I found long ago about various implementations of home urinals by guys. I’ve lost track of the address. Some were out in the open in the basement, and others were built into closets, and a few were just added to one of the bathrooms. An article about home urinals said that the biggest objection to them came from realtors because many buyers didn’t like the idea.

One of the homes was owned by a couple with six or seven or more boys, and the father knew it would create havoc having them running in and out of the house to use the bathroom. So he built an addition to the back of the house with its own entrance, and inside was a large shower area and a long trough urinal, plus sinks and toilets and places to hang clothes, etc. A clothes washer and dryer would be a good idea too but I don’t remember if that was added. I’m sure his wife approved of that whole arrangement.

This somehow reminds me of s story that Paul Dixon used to tell. When he was hospitalized there was a knock at his hospital door and he said come in. It was the nurse who proceeded to remove his bed pan from under him and clean it. She then took his clothes off and gave him a sponge bath and then dressed him again. As she was leaving he said, “Why did you bother to knock”?

Ironically, I’ve had the same idea for years. Besides, nonexpanding universe certainty caused Einstein to remove his correct cosmological constant. A very big boo-boo proved by Hubble much later.

what’s SHE gonna do with a URINAL..????

Not until you live alone, Earl. Nobody (not even your wife) wants to see you going to the bathroom. And YOU shouldn’t want anyone to see you doing it either. I would get ROYALLY ticked off at my ex when he accidentally walked in on me while I was using the toilet.

At least a urinal might eliminate the old toilet seat left up problem for Opal.

Earl and Opal switched sides! Is the left side closer to the bathroom?

Careful Earl, you put in a urinal she’ll expect you to clean it.

bed pan – hospital portable one works as well. has a lid, and doesn’t require leaving the bed. just be accurate or you might regret it.

I agree with Opal.

Yes, a urinal is what I would like. No more lid lifting, is the seat up or down, less water usage.

I’m with Opal on this one! EW

In yesterday’s strip Earl was on the left side of the bed and Opal was on the right when Earl left to go to the bathroom. When Earl returned in today’s strip he was on the right side of the bed and Opal was on the left.

He switched bed sides.

Use the window then, {I ah I mean} Nelson does.

If women can have the bidets then Earl should have his urinal.

It would stop the.. put the lid down or.. wipe the seat if you miss arguments.

It’s called a chamber pot

seems like a good idea to me

Earl, go to amazon and buy the p i s s bags, liquid turns solid and you’re all set, or do like I do get your own bedroom and put in whatever appliance you want…

Wonder if the switch sides of the bed every night?

Urinal in the bedroom. Horrible visual.

Pull ups come in adult sizes. He wouldn’t even need to get up and flush a urinal.

Sounds like Earl needs to check with his doctor on that ne Urolift procedure you see advertised on TV.

Uh, Opal they do make portable urinals for men…..much easier to use than the female version.

What’s up? In the July-19 cartoon, Earl was on the other side of the bed. Every married man knows that, once a woman stakes out her side of the bed, there will be changes for any reason.

Nay because he’s not going to clean it is he?

Handy for traveling or when stuck in traffic.

https://tinyurl.com/3fx67h2a

Just think though. No more worrying if he put the seat down, and no more wet seat when he forgets to lift it in the first place.

In VN we had a pipe with a funnel on the back porch of our hooch. The pipe was stuck into a buried drum .

We had a urinal in our house when we bought it, but it didn’t even work. Needless to say it is long gone…..yuck.

do they normally switch sides of the bed?

My brother has one in his downstairs bathroom.

The real problem here is Earl’s lack of salesmanship. Urinal? Absolutely not. But suggest to her that they could both benefit from adding an actual bathroom to the bedroom (not to mention adding to the value of the house), and she might agree.

a urinal a day keeps the bed wetting away

Gross.

They switched sides…OOPS!

In my last house, there was a urinal in the bedroom. We called it…THE BATHROOM!