Pickles by Brian Crane for July 24, 2023

Well you tried Earl.

Proof that she is older than sin

Opal proves the writer’s point…

Sounds gruesome when you think about it.

Earl, you better not tell her about oatmeal cookies and Girl Scout cookies!

Your Honor, I rest my case!

Opal is the one a little dense this time.

Sometimes there is difference between what males think is funny and what females think is funny. Dad jokes don’t always work for moms.

Reminds me of in Mary Poppins where Bert tells Uncle Albert a joke to cheer him up and says “I always say there’s nothing like a good joke.” Uncle Albert replies: “No. And that was nothing like a good joke.”

https://clip.cafe/mary-poppins-1964/i-got-a-jolly-joke-i-saved-just-such-an-occasion/

Obtuse wins.

What about motor oil?

Some baby’s feelings were hurt in the making of this cartoon.

Wait for the punch line.

I don’t get it.

You have to get up pretty early “oiley?” in the morning to get one over on Opal, Earl!

“I’ll never forget walking down one of the aisles (of the grocery store) and seeing powdered milk; just add water and you get milk. Right next to it was powdered orange juice; just add water and you get orange juice. Then I saw baby powder, and I thought to myself, What a country!” – Yakov Smirnov

I love these guys! And I am one of those ‘older adults’!

“If tin whistles are made of tin, what are foghorns made of?”

That was for the benefit of the reading audience, Opal.

Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?

Way to prove the writer’s point, Opal!

It’s not surprising that older people wouldn’t get the same jokes that young people get, especially if the jokes involve pop culture references or current slang. On the other hand, a lot of younger people wouldn’t get jokes told by the older generation.

Methusela is her brother.

Oh for GOD sake..!!!!!

That’s a poor excuse for a joke under any circumstances.

I am pretty sure my wife is not a bigamist, secretly married to Earl. Maybe Opal is a twin sister I didn’t know about.

And they grind up what is left to make baby powder

At this point, my wife would be making an irrelevant rant about oil and the price of gas.

Yesterday I had coffee with my nine buddies aged 66 > 79. For some reason we started talking about circumcision. So I mentioned that the current charge for circumcision is $200, plus tips. Half of them cracked up, and the other half didn’t get it.

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

Nothing like proving the point, eh?

I get the type of response Opal gave a lot. People seem to have missed the If part, and give me a serious response to the “What” part. Two examples:

If the opposite of “pro” is “con”, what is the opposite of “progress”?

If a vegetarian is someone who eats vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

Isn’t the answer supposed to be “babies”?

Petroleum.

I just told this joke to my wife. I got pretty much the same reaction.

My wife often doesn’t get my jokes … of course, the fact that she doesn’t speak English may have something to do with it. The gag often gets lost in the translation!

Quit whiles you’re ahead!

I once asked the internets if Baby Oil was flammable – it replied “No, but it is combustible, to keep those oiled babies away from an open flame”

I remember the old Yakov Smirnoff routine about going to the supermarket. He saw powdered milk, just add water and you have milk. On another aisle, he saw powdered orange juice, just add water and you have orange juice. On yet another aisle, he saw baby powder – and exclaimed, “America! What a country!”

And…rimshot!

In my experience with some of my elders, it’s not that they don’t get the joke, they just can’t hear it well enough. If you don’t give it clearly the first time, you will be doomed to repeat the punchline.

Opal fits the bill!

Ooh, Pearl is good. Nailed him!

Thank you Opal for proving the university’s study.

I would have loved to have a conversation with both Albert Einstein and Stephen Hawking, Einstein and I would talk of music (he played the violin and I play the guitar) and Hawking about his humor despite his disabilities (I had an uncle who had polio who never had his disability stop him). If they both talked about Science I would be outside looking in so maybe I’ll add Sean Connery just so that I can listen to that voice one more time and he could talk about whatever he wanted. Indiana Jones was Henry Jones Junior and Indiana was the dog’s name??? lol

I know your pain, Earl, I know your pain…

OK, so what is mineral oil made from?