Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for July 30, 2023

I have a bidet toilet seat, love it BUT if you let it go too long a fan will start to dry your behind. Not pleasent!

…until Hubby cranks out the remains of that bean burrito….. “Gee, babe, to think that just a few hours ago, that was in your mouth.”

Religious rituals can be strange. For the end of Lent in Catholic school we did the stations of the cross (Christ’s suffering et al) all week while the public school kids were at the beach on spring break. Lucky pagans!

One time I was 1,677 years old.

One time I had $701.

One time I had six eyes.

One time there was a toilet that could be used by three people simultaneously.

May the Lord be with you as He is with me.

Other than the bee’s eyes, this whole thing was disgusting!

What do you mean, “it saves water”? What kind of way is that to save water? Where do you think the water goes after that?

“Nothing is more romantic than synchronized bowel movements.” — Said nobody, ever.

I remember seeing the “Lover’s Toilet” in a skit on Saturday Night Live.

“Did you get your clothes picked up in the bedroom, dear? KA-BLAMMO!” ….. “No, I’ll get that done after the boys and I golf this afternoon. KA-BLAMMO!” ….. “No way! I’ve got to do laundry and I’m tired of always picking up after you! You get that done or no golf! KA-BLAMMO!” ….. “Okay okay, sheesh, don’t have a cow! KA-BLAMMO!” “And what about the garage? That’s got to be done, too. The clutter is so bad we have to park in the driveway! KA-BLAMMO!” “(mumbles) Well I guess no golf today. FWEEEEEEEEEEEEEP” ….. “That’s right! KA-BLAMMO!”

May the bass chord be with you as it is with my ladyyyy. And gesundheit.

For $700 you can order 2 pancakes for your kids at Disney.

Who in their right minds would buy a burger like that?

That hamburger sounds kind of disgusting.

I’d love to try that sandwich, but someone would have to buy it for me.

Seems there is a bee’s theme today for some reason. In 4 comics I have read., 3 (Calvin and Hobbes, Brewster Rocket, and this one) are featuring bees. There may be more as I have about 15 more to check out.

TwoDeLoo? My face would be flush with embarrassment if i made up that name

$700 is a lot of money to turn into feces. Got better things to do with mine. A Burger King Whopper I bought in January 2023 cost $5 and change. The same Whopper in June cost $9 and change. This week, in July, it cost $12 in change. That’s a whopping increase over 7 months.

Love that lovesheet.

The TwoDaLoo was an SNL skit and was hilarious!

SNL did it first. https://youtu.be/avb1XbO0EIs

Gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes while dropping a deuce? I’ll pass.

That Wagyu Meat Burger is missing it’s most crucial element: haggis! Doo yah call that a sandwich, man?

Nothing more romantic than the comingling of stench and thirds as they go down the pipes, playing that immortal rendition of “♪♫ Amazing Waste ♪♫”. I think I’m going to pass out from THAT thought. ;-P

Too-da-loo used to mean a cheerful goodbye.

gold leaf on food is idiotic.

IDK what’s grosser: kissing that dead guy’s feet, or sharing it with thousands of others…

When real products are inspired by Saturday Night Live spoof commercials (in this case “The Love Toilet”), you know society is in decline :D

That toilet might save water but it also take a lot of the “mystery” away.