Crankshaft by Tom Batiuk and Dan Davis for May 01, 2024

“We play in our marching band! We’ve seen things you book signers wouldn’t believe… Attack buses running over kids in Lorain… I watched Cleveland K-Mart blue lights glitter in the dark near Tom’s old hardware store in Medina. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain… Time to buy DRUMS ALONG THE SIDELINES!” Dinkle: “Well played!” (mutters to kids) “It’s the GOOD blow this time, right? You little bits ain’t ripping me off a third time!” (Shining Twins giggle) “It’s our Peruvian marching band powder!”

“Band candy? Pikers! Sell band turkeys! Band mattresses! Band duplexes! Think big and expensive! Make them take out loans! Grab them by their credit card numbers!”

I think that if they made a Wack-a-Mole with these three heads, they’d have to close it after 5 minutes because the Dinkle Head was already exploded.

“We play in our school’s marching band…which was Westview High until two years ago, when we suddenly found ourselves de-aged and back in middle school!”

Actually, this one makes sense. The Grady Twins are always hanging out in Lizard Lil’s Literary Loft, so of course they’d show up for Dinkleberg’s signing, and the fundraising trap they set for him is mildly amusing. Still, I have a feeling this “B-minus” effort will be the apex of this week’s arc.

Thankfully, the band program where I went to school never had to resort to that. Instead, the band boosters owned EVERY piece of concession equipment throughout the entire school district. So if the concession stand was open for any event, the band was making money.

Panel 2: Harry is actually taking a very satisfying dump..

“Now buy my book or get out.”

Bingle is sporting his plastic teeth, which are about to fall out.

An.. actually funny joke? After so much repetitive nonsense with this guy? I mean it’s not AMAZING but it’s something actually entertaining.

If you say you support their efforts, you’d better buy some candy!

Today’s strip is not so much a joke as a call-out for a joke we’ve heard so many times that we don’t need to hear the set-up. Band is about fundraising, ha-ha! Batty might just as well have said “number 83,” as in the old joke about the comedians’ club meeting. And then we could respond, “you told it wrong!”

Great lead!!!!!

laughing at this is like trying to post on comics kingdom very hard

they say batiuk tried to enter the dialouge contest at red and rover and got deleted STAT

We shall see if the pompous fool buys any.

We were teenagers when you knew us, and most elementary schools don’t have marching bands, but who cares?

LOOK! Out the window! You can see the tree in Ed’s yard! That’s as close as you’re going to get to the title character until Sunday.

Oh, Thank you Dinkle! We were sure we could count on you.

We have your pallet of Band Candy next to your trailer

Harry recognizes the tactic the kids are using. He originated it.

Harry admires the twins’ spunk, style and delivery; it brings back memories!

So they evolved from Dinkel’s “band turkeys”.

Well drawn. Actually a well placed sales pitch.

Chocolate is much better that frozen Turkeys.

Of course, Band Candy is the Cheapest chocolate they could find being sold at Godiva prices.