A wife arrived home from a shopping trip, and was horrified to find her husband in bed, naked, with a much younger and far more attractive woman. Just as his wife was about to storm out of the house, he stopped her: “Honey, before you leave, please let me explain.”
The wife stopped to listen.
He continued, “I was driving along the highway, and I saw this young girl looking very tired and bedraggled, so I offered her a lift. She was also hungry, so I brought her home and made her a meal from the roast beef in the refrigerator which you didn’t like. Her sandals were pretty worn, too, so I gave her a pair of your shoes you’d discarded simply because they were out of style. She was cold, so I gave her the sweater I bought you for your birthday – the one you never wore because the colors didn’t suit you. Her pants were torn as well, so I gave her a pair of yours that were perfectly good, but much too small for you now.”
The wife seemed to have no problem with any of this, but still needed one question answered. “That’s all fine and good,” she said, “but why did I find you both in our bed with no clothes on?”
“Well, that’s simple… see, as she was about to leave the house, she turned to me and asked, “Is there anything else that your wife doesn’t use anymore?”
The Marvelous Spatuletail reminds me of the mythical Shemya Ohno bird, of Shemya Alaska. It’s scrotum hung below it’s legs, hence it’s distinctive cry when it landed, “ Oh No!”
Da Hong Pao is a Chinese oolong tea that is cultivated in the Wuyi Mountains of China. The tea is a Wuyi rock tea and is also known as Big Red Robe tea. This type of oolong tea is one of the most expensive teas in the world and is often reserved for welcoming elite guests. It is classified as one of the Chinese Famous Teas as well as a Four Great Bushes tea.
This oolong tea is heavily oxidized and offers a unique flavor profile and sweet aroma that you can’t find in most other oolongs. The tea has peaty and earthy notes with hints of stone fruit, brown sugar, and molasses. It has a woody fragrance with mild notes of tobacco and the body is velvety smooth with mild notes of sandalwood.
In China, the tea is described as having Yan Yun, a balanced profile that blends multiple characteristics. It features a pure flavor with a fresh orchid sensation and each leaf is consistently roasted during production. It’s the perfect blend of sweet and mellow with a touch of liveliness that keeps things interesting.
What makes Da Hong Pao so special is its history and cultivation. According to local Chinese legend, an emperor’s mother came down with a mysterious illness. She was only cured after drinking tea made from four special tea bushes in the Wuyi Mountains. As a sign of his gratitude, the emperor gifted red robes to protect the plants.
Today, the tea is made from wild tea plants that grow natively on the cliffs and rock ledges of the Wuyi Mountains. The most expensive Da Hong Pao oolong teas come from the four original tea bushes on Tianxin Rock. There are two more original tea plants, but these are referred to as the mother trees and are no longer used to produce tea.
There are three main types of Da Hong Pao ranging from the high-quality tea soured from the original tea trees to a more affordable yet lower quality variety. The first type is known as Mother Tree Da Hong Pao or the original Da Hong Pao. This type of Da Hong Pao is the most expensive on the planet and was hand-crafted by tea masters. In 2007, the Chinese government banned the production of tea using the mother plants in order to preserve them. The last batches of tea made from the original plants have fetched tens of thousands of dollars for just a few grams.
The second highest-quality variety is known as Purebred Da Hong Pao. This type of oolong tea is as close to the original Big Red Robe tea as most tea drinkers will ever get. In the late 20th century, scientists at a university in the Fujian Province took small fragments from the original Da Hong Pao tea bushes. They were able to cultivate new plants from these cuttings, dramatically increasing the production capacity of Red Robe teas.
The most affordable Da Hong Pao is actually a blend of other Wuyi rock teas with similar flavor characteristics. The tea is typically a mixture of some purebred Da Hong Pao leaves and other Wuyi oolong teas such as Shui Xian and Rou Gui or even Tie Guan Yin.
ronaldspence 8 months ago
that tea is just slightly cheaper than starbucks…
Leroy 8 months ago
…But the Pumpkin Spice Da Hong Pao is REALLY overpriced!
The dude from FL Premium Member 8 months ago
$2400 that will be P in a short time.
Pickled Pete 8 months ago
A wife arrived home from a shopping trip, and was horrified to find her husband in bed, naked, with a much younger and far more attractive woman. Just as his wife was about to storm out of the house, he stopped her: “Honey, before you leave, please let me explain.”
The wife stopped to listen.
He continued, “I was driving along the highway, and I saw this young girl looking very tired and bedraggled, so I offered her a lift. She was also hungry, so I brought her home and made her a meal from the roast beef in the refrigerator which you didn’t like. Her sandals were pretty worn, too, so I gave her a pair of your shoes you’d discarded simply because they were out of style. She was cold, so I gave her the sweater I bought you for your birthday – the one you never wore because the colors didn’t suit you. Her pants were torn as well, so I gave her a pair of yours that were perfectly good, but much too small for you now.”
The wife seemed to have no problem with any of this, but still needed one question answered. “That’s all fine and good,” she said, “but why did I find you both in our bed with no clothes on?”
“Well, that’s simple… see, as she was about to leave the house, she turned to me and asked, “Is there anything else that your wife doesn’t use anymore?”
therese_callahan2002 8 months ago
Wow, talk about all the tea in China.
tremaine53 8 months ago
And ironically, da hong pao is said to taste like armpit.
frank_t_novak 8 months ago
Starbucks doesnt serve tea, only coffee.
wirepunchr 8 months ago
The company that made the sandlas went out of business because of the longevity of the sandals.
poppacapsmokeblower 8 months ago
The Marvelous Spatuletail reminds me of the mythical Shemya Ohno bird, of Shemya Alaska. It’s scrotum hung below it’s legs, hence it’s distinctive cry when it landed, “ Oh No!”
oish 8 months ago
I wonder if the bird had a spatula tale about spatula city
Angry Indeed Premium Member 8 months ago
Da Hong Pao. Obviously, not my cup of tea. Way too rich!
Angry Indeed Premium Member 8 months ago
In Chinese, the word tea is called “cha”. Many a cha-ching was heard at the cash register for this expensive brew!
VoodooMom 8 months ago
I was wondering where I left those sandals.
fourteenpeeves 8 months ago
Tea for two—-too expensive
oakie817 8 months ago
i need a new pair of sandals…what size are they?
Bilan 8 months ago
How do they know the age of the sandals? Was the price tag still on it?
mindjob 8 months ago
I know Birkenstocks is an old company
haasmeister 8 months ago
No beverage can be that good.
6turtle9 8 months ago
Da Hong Pao is a Chinese oolong tea that is cultivated in the Wuyi Mountains of China. The tea is a Wuyi rock tea and is also known as Big Red Robe tea. This type of oolong tea is one of the most expensive teas in the world and is often reserved for welcoming elite guests. It is classified as one of the Chinese Famous Teas as well as a Four Great Bushes tea.
This oolong tea is heavily oxidized and offers a unique flavor profile and sweet aroma that you can’t find in most other oolongs. The tea has peaty and earthy notes with hints of stone fruit, brown sugar, and molasses. It has a woody fragrance with mild notes of tobacco and the body is velvety smooth with mild notes of sandalwood.
In China, the tea is described as having Yan Yun, a balanced profile that blends multiple characteristics. It features a pure flavor with a fresh orchid sensation and each leaf is consistently roasted during production. It’s the perfect blend of sweet and mellow with a touch of liveliness that keeps things interesting.
6turtle9 8 months ago
What makes Da Hong Pao so special is its history and cultivation. According to local Chinese legend, an emperor’s mother came down with a mysterious illness. She was only cured after drinking tea made from four special tea bushes in the Wuyi Mountains. As a sign of his gratitude, the emperor gifted red robes to protect the plants.
Today, the tea is made from wild tea plants that grow natively on the cliffs and rock ledges of the Wuyi Mountains. The most expensive Da Hong Pao oolong teas come from the four original tea bushes on Tianxin Rock. There are two more original tea plants, but these are referred to as the mother trees and are no longer used to produce tea.
There are three main types of Da Hong Pao ranging from the high-quality tea soured from the original tea trees to a more affordable yet lower quality variety. The first type is known as Mother Tree Da Hong Pao or the original Da Hong Pao. This type of Da Hong Pao is the most expensive on the planet and was hand-crafted by tea masters. In 2007, the Chinese government banned the production of tea using the mother plants in order to preserve them. The last batches of tea made from the original plants have fetched tens of thousands of dollars for just a few grams.
The second highest-quality variety is known as Purebred Da Hong Pao. This type of oolong tea is as close to the original Big Red Robe tea as most tea drinkers will ever get. In the late 20th century, scientists at a university in the Fujian Province took small fragments from the original Da Hong Pao tea bushes. They were able to cultivate new plants from these cuttings, dramatically increasing the production capacity of Red Robe teas.
The most affordable Da Hong Pao is actually a blend of other Wuyi rock teas with similar flavor characteristics. The tea is typically a mixture of some purebred Da Hong Pao leaves and other Wuyi oolong teas such as Shui Xian and Rou Gui or even Tie Guan Yin.
6turtle9 8 months ago
Spatuletale Hummingbird
youtube dot com / watch?v=_z8iS3ApUMM