Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for November 04, 2024

  1. Ding a ling
    BasilBruce  19 days ago

    Many choose the lesser of the two weasels.

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    carlsonbob  19 days ago

    Professional grifter?

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    hariseldon59  19 days ago

    Haven’t seen Pigita in a while.

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    iggyman  19 days ago

    Hold your nose and pick the least objectionable one to you is!

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    Gent  19 days ago

    So Pigita back with Pig eh.

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    CementerAD5  19 days ago

    Did the “opportunistic weasel” do, as is the common practice of one of the two “presidential candidates”, walk out without paying?

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    James Wolfenstein  19 days ago

    I thought it was a “Date with Candi” contest. I rarely win anyway. I guessed Biden in 2020, and 80 million more did, too :D

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    mrwiskers  19 days ago

    President Jimmy Carter seems to stand out among politicians. I wonder if it’s because he did not display common traits we associate with politicians?

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    win.45mag  19 days ago

    Well, who would date a pig, anyways ?

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    steveh64  19 days ago

    The word “candidate” come from Latin candidatus, literally “clothed in white”, referring to the white togas worn by candidates in ancient Rome.

    So I suppose a prime candidate would have been Colonel Sanders.

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    cdward  19 days ago

    So, how do we have a form of governance (given that no society can exist without it) that isn’t a dictatorship or absolute monarchy without people running for office? Is it the people or is it just the system that forces them to bow to money and spend all their time tearing down their opponents rancher than actually governing?

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    The Orange Mailman  19 days ago

    It’s two. Just look at your word balloon.

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    Courage the Cowardly Dog!  19 days ago

    Ron, the Opportunistic Weasel! Sounds good to me!

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    Courage the Cowardly Dog!  19 days ago

    I would be running to my office tomorrow morning too, like everyday!

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    Huckleberry Hiroshima  19 days ago

    Pigita!

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    dsatvoinde Premium Member 19 days ago

    There’s an idea. All candidates have to literally run. One individual stands out that wouldn’t even be able to fake a jog.

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    Kilrwat Premium Member 19 days ago

    The LAST thing voters want is someone who is “candid”.

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    SusieB  19 days ago

    Nice to see Pigita

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    jel354  19 days ago

    Pig and Pigita aren’t fighting? This is new.

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    kdandre63  19 days ago

    Cynicism is just another term for lazy thinking.

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    Out of the Past  19 days ago

    “Never worked a day in my life” fits all of them but it’s too long, so I’d just go with “crook”.

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    shawnc1959  19 days ago

    To paraphrase humor writer Dave Barry, “Opportunistic Weasel” would also be an excellent name for a rock band.

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    bunwarpgazoo Premium Member 19 days ago

    So what’s stopping you from casting your hat in the ring? Attending party events? At least writing to your various representatives? You know, actually taking part in the process while you can. Start with the town council.

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    Goat from PBS  19 days ago

    Pigita, wow, it’s been… a loooong time.

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    Kle1  19 days ago

    We already have words – con man is probably the best phrase.Admittedly, at the local level there are sometimes reasonably decent people running.

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    TrulyTexan  19 days ago

    Everybody needs to stop the shaming. Weasels are actually fine creatures.

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    aerotica69  19 days ago

    “Slimebucket” has a nice ring to it.

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    Ellis97  19 days ago

    It’s been a while since we’ve seen Pigita.

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    LaughterIsJoyMuliplied  19 days ago

    Just had to stir the pot Steph?

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    tony_n_jen2003  19 days ago

    Hyphenate

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    monya_43  19 days ago

    I hope the treasonweasel doesn’t get elected.

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    Eric S   19 days ago

    Pigita is a b!tch.

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    cellodude1990  19 days ago

    I haven’t seen Pigita in a while. I thought that Pig was dating other women, too. I wonder if these two are getting back together.

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    martens  19 days ago

    What’s everybody got against weasels?

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    zeexenon  19 days ago

    No, its synonym is “politician.” Closely following ‘political promises.’

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    BRICKPART Premium Member 19 days ago

    Lawyerhood as opposed to lawyerdumb.

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    KEA  19 days ago

    What we need are more people who care about public service

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    Bilan  19 days ago

    He wouldn’t be running for office if he just left on time.

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    ncorgbl  19 days ago

    Who wants to date a pig? Even with lipstick she’s still a pig.

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    rshive  19 days ago

    Two words, Pigita. But accurate anyway.

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    James Noury Premium Member 19 days ago

    Nice to see Pigita again!

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    wildlandwaters  19 days ago

    coulda sworn that guy’s name was JD…

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    Walrus Gumbo Premium Member 19 days ago

    Voting for Trump is the equivalent of chickens voting for Colonel Sanders!

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    Radish...   19 days ago

    Speaking of opportunistic woman hating weasels…

    ‘Am I allowed to hit her now?’ Trump stuns with Michelle Obama remark

    J.D. Vance calls Kamala Harris ‘trash’ at Michigan rally

    Remember when JD called Trump ’America’s Hitler’?

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    braindead Premium Member 19 days ago

    And in case you didn’t see it before…

    From Jim Wright:

    Elon Musk in charge of the economy…

    RFK Jr in managing your healthcare…

    Mike Flynn commanding your military…

    Charlie Kirk, Tucker Carlson, Steve Bannon, and the dead rotting corpse of Rush Limbaugh are the moral conscience of your America…

    Stephen Miller decides your political ideology…

    Laura Loomer is the voice and face of your nation…

    Chief Justice Canon presides over a Supreme Court made up entirely of Trump appointees…

    JD Vance in charge of reining in Trump’s worst impulses…

    You have no healthcare, no Social Security, no civil rights, no jobs, no savings, no food, no home, no education, and no hope

    Sound’s good, right?

    No?

    Well, then you better show up.

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    CleverHans Premium Member 19 days ago

    According to the etymology that I just made up, “candidate” comes from “Candida Albicans”, the fungus responsible for candidiasis, aka yeast infections, diaper rash, jock itch, etc. So political candidates are telling the truth when they claim to be a “fun guy.”

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    pamela welch Premium Member 19 days ago

    Brilliant, Stephan!!

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    [Unnamed Reader - 14b4ce]  19 days ago

    Hey,most politicians aren’t half bad.

    They’re ALL bad

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    Richard S Russell Premium Member 19 days ago

    This is grossly unfair to many good, dedicated public servants who run for elected office because they sincerely want to help their fellow citizens and make their lives better.

    “The legitimate object of government is to do for a community of people whatever they need to have done, but cannot do at all, or cannot do so well, for themselves, in their separate and individual capacities.” —Abraham Lincoln

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    Richard S Russell Premium Member 19 days ago

    Has anybody ever heard Donald Trump laff out loud at something he thot was funny? The guy is relentlessly dour. I don’t think he has any sense of humor at all. Even when he tries to fake a smile, the best he can muster is a smirk, sneer, or grimace.

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    Buoy  19 days ago

    Oh great! Now I have to worry about weasels AND weevils?

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    amaryllis2 Premium Member 19 days ago

    One candidate supports your right to disagree with her. The other is the Fred Phelps of politics.

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    olds_cool63  18 days ago

    Obligatory pearl necklace for the female animal. How original.

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    Laurie Stoker Premium Member 18 days ago

    Two words, but I say go for it!

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    eddi-TBH  18 days ago

    How about the old classic, “carpetbagger”?

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    TheBigPickle  18 days ago

    I candid ate a candi date.

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    Chris Sherlock  18 days ago

    You win some and you lose some, Ron.

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    baraktorvan  18 days ago

    Another reason English can be difficult to master.

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    AndrewSihler  18 days ago

    Wrong etymology, it’s actually “candied date”, as in date palm.

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