Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 09, 2024

i wonder what rat thinks about remy from ratatouille

Actually, just being a Rat is a disability. Unfortunately, there’s no cure for it.

“Then why don’t you do something about it?” He could stay away from people…

He has an ability to dis people. Therefore it is a dis-ability.

That is a good way to get a disabled parking permit.

Rat has dis-ability and dat-ability.

I want to hit Rat into another incarnation. You see, I have a disabled placard, and there are able-bodied people who use someone else’s placard to park in our spots. Some don’t even bother with that, and park there anyway.

I wonder who Rat bribed to get the disability placard?

Sadly, some people excuse or justify their own behavior saying “That’s just the way I am.” Or someone excuses someone else’s behavior saying “That’s just the way he or she is.”

“I don’t mind if you don’t like my manners. I don’t like ’em myself. They are pretty bad. I grieve over them during long winter evenings.” — Humphrey Bogart as Phillip Marlowe (private eye), in “The Big Sleep” (1946)

Rat needs a disability animal – possibly a wolverine.

As Joe Piscopo said in Johnny Dangerously, “I am disabled, I’m psychotic!”

Next thing we know there will be a social media campaign to cancel Goat.

The Count and Rat are not rude. Just blatantly honest with Liberal mushrooms. God Bless America!

Hopefully when Rat tries to find a disabled parking spot, and entitled person hasn’t taking the spot.

Next Rat will adopt Goat as his service animal.

A little? No.

A lot? Yes.

Rat takes pride in being awful and doesn’t plan to change that.

This is why you never see comfort rats.

Someone told Rat to get a hobby. Something he enjoys.

Making excuses is not disability.

If his parking permit has been disabled, that means he can’t use it.

I have a genetic disorder where my body cannot manufacture its’ own alcohol. I have to supplement.

Maybe if he FIXED his parking permit, it wouldn’t be disabled.

That does explain a lot. He’s certified. But I thought the punchline was going to be along the lines of, “There’s nothing I can do about it: I’m already as rude as possible.”

Now that’s just rude!

Kinda coasted on the art chores today, Mr. Pastis! Without getting out tools for fine measurement, I see four identical panels copied & pasted.

Disabled parking placards are for people with physical disabilities, not psychological/psychiatric disabilities.

that’s actually hilarious

Bingo.

Or a Honey Badger?

That maybe the biggest crock to come from Rat ever.

So that’s why some folks without a disability permit park illegally they’re actually mentally disabled

Mine too, ironically … you dirty rat.

Narcissism is cross species in this world.

I do think of people with mental disorders involving impaired empathy as having a disability. I don’t see why we should envy them for not feeling the pain their behavior can cause others, since they also cannot feel the joy.

At this rate, all parking spots will be labeled for the disabled. They will be dislabeled

Actually, people with ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder, which is covered by the American with Disability Act) are often accused of being rude because we do not act the same way as neurotypical people. For example, I have been told I am rude because I “don’t talk enough.” Well, people with ASD are bad a small talk—it can be very awkward. People with ASD “don’t smile enough.” We are accused of being rude when we don’t eat something someone else prepared because of sensory processing issues. Young people with ASD often don’t have the social scripts that others pick up early on, so our awkwardness is perceived as being rude.

Speaking of rude – this just in:

AUSTIN, TX—In a sweeping prohibition with immediate implications for the Lone Star State’s potential mothers-to-be, Texas banned the sale of luggage to pregnant women Monday. “With this law, we ensure that no gestating woman living in our great state can pack her belongings and escape our will,” Gov. Greg Abbott said upon signing the bill, explaining that the You’re Not Going Anywhere Act outlaws the sale of all suitcases, duffel bags, and backpacks to women without the express consent of at least two male family members or a waiver granted by the governor himself. “Should an expectant woman be found in possession of luggage of any kind—even a small handbag or clutch, which we all know can be used to smuggle mifepristone—she will be subject to the full force of the Texas healthcare system. And rest assured, we have mandated that all luggage sold in the state can only be unlocked with a negative pregnancy test.” At press time, Texas reportedly expanded its ban to include the sale of plane tickets, travel-size shampoo, and gasoline to pregnant women. – The Onion

Funny, I don’t think Rat’s a little rude to others.

(operative word: little)

Someone should get Rat a terrier for a service dog. I heard they are really good at “taking care of” rats.

I told someone the other day that being an a$$hole was a disability. He told me I was wrong. Apparently, I’m right. I’m going to get my parking tag tomorrow

My MAGA sister told me that calling her MAGA was a form of bullying!

I mean given how much the US worships psychopaths and sociopaths errr…CEOs and the next President, it wouldn’t surprise me if they tried to get those 2 conditions added to the disabilities list.