Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for June 30, 2011

Is there any place on earth safe from those aliens?

In Texas they are called Attorneys, because their pronounciation of Lawyers sounds identical to Liars.

Right. The private beach gets the lifeguards, and the public beach gets the lawy- err, the attorneys.

On a private beach the sharks are ON the beach…

And you thought getting suit-ready for the beach meant exercising.

Isn’t our pres. a lawy-eer?

This one will help you sink.

Safest beach to swim at as the sharks won’t attack due to “professional courtesy”.Incidentally, how private can the beach be if any schmuck can just wander on to it?!? My idea of who can get on to a private beach is…. me.

Obi Wan: Luke welcome to America and her lawyers…You’ll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy…

uh oh, sharks sighted. Quick get the lawyers in the water to scare them off.

and all the judges. which takes care of all 3 branches of the government

Well, it’s like this. The average person can’t afford to get elected. Businessmen don’t have enough free time to get elected. That leaves Lawyers as the only ones for those jobs.G-d help us all.

Around here, we call them “lounge lizards”.

Earl Wash: I hadn’t heard that one before. ; ) You made my day!

Personally, I wouldn’t go to any private beach that would allow me to be there.

Fair warning: Once my daughter finishes law school, I will have to sue all of your for libel. :-) Including the Road Runner coyote.

Ambulances chase lawyers !

It’s all very easy to rag on lawyers until you actually need one. I am on disability. Several years ago, the government tried to collect from me $9,000 they alleged was paid to me in error. An excellent attorney took my case pro bono. Over the course of several months, she spent more time on the phone dealing with federal flunkies than I can imagine, eventually winning my case. I no longer rag on lawyers.

a good lawyer is worth his or her weight in gold. the problem is that often “a good lawyer” seems to be an oxymoron,

I see no guard or hand rails. that’s basis for a personal injury suit.

My family had a beachfront cottage on Cape Cod. We usually sat on cottage’s decks rather than on the beach, but my father (who was a Judge) would get apoplectic if someone sat on “his” beach, or even walked across it. Even more apoplectic when someone stole the private beach signs. There was a breakthrough in the barrier beach protecting our property and eventually our cottage fell into the Atlantic proving it wasn’t his beach after all.

Lawyers are like nuclear weapons. Nobody likes them, but you have to have them because the other guy has them too.

Finding a “good” lawyer requires an alchemist; one who can turn lead into gold.

Sharks saving you from sharks? Is that kosher?

if the lawyer were really on duty, he’d be having them sign a release….

I don’t have a problem with lawyers, but private beaches get on my nerves. Fortunately in Michigan the public can walk on all beaches….between the water and the highest waterline.

Different FROM…more than, less than, different FROM.