Crankshaft by Tom Batiuk and Dan Davis for October 27, 2024

Trying to paint over the woeful wet firecracker that was the Pulitzer-bait “The Burnings”TM arc won’t stop readers from remembering sitting through it, Batiuk.

So, the Grady Twins are high school age again this time. Let’s see how long that lasts.

He literally couldn’t write a single story for the Mary Shelley-inspired Halloween arc he trumpeted for a WEEK? It’s just Lady Tom again? From the TOM that has already compared himself to HEMINGWAY, and now thinks he’s WHITMAN? Oh, Tommy: There’s a difference between “I contain multitudes” and “The voices in my head NEVER SHUT UP!” How long is the failed F451 arc going to go on? Tom, I’m kinda sure the Pulitzers don’t add points for stalking.

The Grating Cover-up, by Batiuk + Nixon.

If you don’t sand the burned wood first, the soot will mess up the paint. And how did Lizard Lil remove the red-black paint from the sign?

Make the LOSERS who did that pay for time and materials!

Tom, the fact that you will never achieve your life’s ambition warms my heart. Even the degraded token that the Pulitzer has become is a hopeless mirage in the cold desert of your declining years.

Why can’t you be more like Sylvia Plath?

Ha! We can hope, T.C.!!

(eyeroll)

If the “damage” just goes away from just painting over it then sure is a very convenient damage.

In other words, the creative team realized not fixing the damage would render their clip art unusable