Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for October 26, 2019

My guess is that the strangers will be invited to a banquet

You called “heads” so you can go first.

I prefer cautious optimism and my caution would say, not there, not today.

If you can’t read the signs when they are right in front of you, you really are in trouble.

Hey guys, they’re just giving you a heads up.

Stop SKULLking around in the bushes and go and meet your new “friends”

But optimists give food for thought.

A pessimist would say, “Well, that proves we’re going to die. Might as well get it over with.” An optimist would say, “Look at that very clear warning. If we sneak out of here now, we have a chance to make it home alive.”

Better to be cautious, with the glass half empty….

A pessimist is never disappointed, we know we’re doomed. If something good, by chance, should happen we are truly amazed and delighted.

I’m optimistically pessimistic.

He got the dying part right. I recommend RSVPing “no” when they invite you to dinner.

That is why I am an optimistic pessimist, that way when things go right, I am pleasantly surprised.

A pessimist has no engine, an optimist has no brakes.

But… https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2019/09/01/755185560/optimists-for-the-win-finding-the-bright-side-might-help-you-live-longer

Go to the head of the class.

“Is that you Yorick? And Horatio?”…

I think I have a bone to pick with you about your interpretation.

How does that saying go? “An optimist believes we live in the best of all worlds. A pessimist fears this is true.”

I consider myself a realist.

Honey! Guess who showed up for dinner.

I’m optimistic that if anything can go wrong, it probably will.

There’s optimism and there’s stupidity.

That’s not an optimist, it’s a reality-denier

They’ll probably want to have you come over for lunch.

Maybe it’s just an ad for an artifacts for sale shop down the road.

That’s not optimism – that’s simple cluelessness. Pessimists are just as subject to cluelessness.

If they’re looking for new jobs, they’re in luck—they’ve found some of the best headhunters in the business.

“I’m optimistic about going in the other direction.”

Throughout history in cultures across the globe, a head on a pike means turn around now because we are scary. Only the stupid ignore that.

It actually says “To Serve Mankind.”

A pessimist is just an optimist who sees things more clearly.

The optimist says “The glass is half full.”

The pessimist says “The glass is half empty.”

The engineer says “Looks like you’ve overdesigned your glass there.”

Most likely, this native tribe has beef with the neighboring tribe. Archeologists are an outside of context problem, so fall under the ‘hospitality to strangers’ rule.

They’re also fun to pass along ‘quaint native habits’ to for the amusement of the village.

I know, real anthropology ruins the joke. But it’s an old un, and there are new veins to mine in the field of native/explore humor.

We are at the Mayo Clinic GOL Transplant House. Our first visit was happy, happy, everyone’s going to get better! But each return trip we learn of friends we’d made who have died. It’s sobering. Now we decided to not expect too much, and be pleased if things work out.

Sorry but Optimists outlive pessimists. It has been tested.

He’s right, except for one word: It’s “YOU’RE dying”

Just entering “Missionary Meadow”.

Why realists outlive non-realists…

Realists are saddled with a clear vision of reality. There is no evolutionary advantage to be shorn of the psychological cushions that evolution has given humanity. We are unlucky ducks being born outliers in that area.

Pessimists may live longer, but they are less pleasant to be around.

Lajoyce Lewis or Joyce Lewis? Caution flags arise in the Lacy lines when skulls appear without Patrick Kennedy nearby to identify them on 31st and Sheridan Streets.

Yup—optimism untempered with realism is just foolishness.

I’m realistic about yesterday, optimistic about today and pessimistic about tomorrow.

We love strangers. They’re delicious!

Amazing! No mention of trump…..oops….sorry.

Who knew “Trick or Treat” had traveled to such a Remote Culture?

The thing about optimism is that you’re often disappointed. The thing about pessimism is that you’re often right, and if wrong, it’s a pleasant  surprise.

No, You’re gonna die when you meet us!

Optimists aren’t stupid