Favorite flight-attendant safety messages, from back before they started playing recordings:
“If you’re traveling with a child, adjust your own oxygen mask first. If you’re traveling with more than one child, decide right now which one you love the most.”
“… and you unbuckle the seat belt the same way as every other seat belt you’ve ever used.”
“Our pilot today is Captain Crunch.”
“In the unlikely event of a water landing, you’ll know you’re not in Kansas any more.”
You can hardly blame them. It must get awfully boring after the 1000th repetition of the same line of patter, and at least these guys were entertaining.
It’s funny to read that in a comic strip, but horrible when it happens in real life! One episode of “Air Disasters” (Smithsonian channel, available on YouTube (search for “Engine Catches Fire On Flight 28”)), showed how a plane which burst into flame while taking off had more fatalities than should have been, just because of that kind of behavior—planes are supposed to be able to evacuate ALL passengers and crew in just 90 seconds, but that didn’t happen. Afterwards they did studies and ran tests to see if they could prevent it from happening again and found places for improvement (strip lighting on the floor, wider openings, etc.) See Wikipedia “1985 Manchester Airport disaster”.
Flying from Boise to Denver, our plane was diverted to SLCity due to a tornado warning in Denver (which must happen regularly if the warning signs in the airport are an indication). Folks who would miss their Denver flight got off. No one got on. When we were cleared to depart for Denver, the flight attendant was required to repeat the flight instructions, which he did at warp speed. It was hilarious.
Cattle class is good! my father was in a C – 124 Globemaster crash at Larson A.F.B. , Washington in the early ’50s – hundreds killed – the only survivors were in the “tail”…
When I used to fly (which, thank goodness I don’t anymore), when it came time to leave, I just sat and waited until everyone was pretty much gone, and then calmly and peacefully left the plane. (Fortunately I was never confronted with an emergency situation)
LOL. I had a friend who did that, knocked everyone out of his way and was the first to jump out of the plane. However, the slide had not deployed and he fell all the way to the ground, breaking his back. Karma…..
einarbt about 1 year ago
I will take my chance at the back of the plane in cattle class. Don’t think they are backing plains into mountains yet.
The dude from FL Premium Member about 1 year ago
I will knock down and step on any person insisting on getting their carry ons from the overhead. I will grind my heels into their skull!
John Smith about 1 year ago
Reminds me of the classic comedy routine “Airline Announcements” by George Carlin
Tried to include a link but apparently that’s no longer allowed :(
braindead Premium Member about 1 year ago
Another cartoon Republicans will not understand.
They believe it’s just normal behavior.
Richard S Russell Premium Member about 1 year ago
Favorite flight-attendant safety messages, from back before they started playing recordings:
“If you’re traveling with a child, adjust your own oxygen mask first. If you’re traveling with more than one child, decide right now which one you love the most.”
“… and you unbuckle the seat belt the same way as every other seat belt you’ve ever used.”
“Our pilot today is Captain Crunch.”
“In the unlikely event of a water landing, you’ll know you’re not in Kansas any more.”
You can hardly blame them. It must get awfully boring after the 1000th repetition of the same line of patter, and at least these guys were entertaining.
Sanspareil about 1 year ago
Being business class, they know the cut-throat maneuver!
Imagine about 1 year ago
It’s second nature to them.
jzummak about 1 year ago
That explains George Costanza.
wallylm about 1 year ago
Survival of the shame & guilt-less
sirbadger about 1 year ago
How often is getting to an emergency exit quickly useful?
TampaFanatic1 about 1 year ago
Reminds me of George Costanza at the kid’s birthday party.
LeslieBark about 1 year ago
It’s funny to read that in a comic strip, but horrible when it happens in real life! One episode of “Air Disasters” (Smithsonian channel, available on YouTube (search for “Engine Catches Fire On Flight 28”)), showed how a plane which burst into flame while taking off had more fatalities than should have been, just because of that kind of behavior—planes are supposed to be able to evacuate ALL passengers and crew in just 90 seconds, but that didn’t happen. Afterwards they did studies and ran tests to see if they could prevent it from happening again and found places for improvement (strip lighting on the floor, wider openings, etc.) See Wikipedia “1985 Manchester Airport disaster”.
bdpoltergeist Premium Member about 1 year ago
I see the business folks are giving the flight crew their proper respect, same kind of respect they show their employees
PraiseofFolly about 1 year ago
Emergency Slide Side Wreck-on-omics.
sandpiper about 1 year ago
Nothing funny here. Too many examples already on file.
Rick Smith Premium Member about 1 year ago
Sounds like regular deboarding when it is pulling into the gate.
Pogostiks Premium Member about 1 year ago
Business as usual…
bmckee about 1 year ago
Oddly enough, that’s what usually happens in a plane crash. In all classes.
comixbomix about 1 year ago
They wrote the manual.
ladykat about 1 year ago
Just once in my life, I’d like to go first class on a plane. I’ve done it on a train, and it’s wonderful!
freshmeet2030 about 1 year ago
Oh, c’mon. It’s BUSINESS class.
“Purposefully” not “Frantically” !
Carol from CT about 1 year ago
Thanks. Think I’ll “fly” Amtrak….
shorzy about 1 year ago
True capitalism at work…and they excuse exploitation…
JudyAz about 1 year ago
That’s a really wide aisle!
Daltongang Premium Member about 1 year ago
Southwest Airlines in action.
HOTLOTUS1 about 1 year ago
when it hits the ground, ya’ll will be the SAME class
Count Olaf Premium Member about 1 year ago
Pretty much the same for first class.
batesmom7 about 1 year ago
Flying from Boise to Denver, our plane was diverted to SLCity due to a tornado warning in Denver (which must happen regularly if the warning signs in the airport are an indication). Folks who would miss their Denver flight got off. No one got on. When we were cleared to depart for Denver, the flight attendant was required to repeat the flight instructions, which he did at warp speed. It was hilarious.
thelordthygod666 about 1 year ago
What I like about flying first class, besides being away from the rabble, is getting the complimentary parachute.
dwagner200 about 1 year ago
Don’t kid yourselves. That’s how it’s going down in the no class sections as well.
Steverino Premium Member about 1 year ago
I always thought you ate the old and weak.
AZPhinFan about 1 year ago
Sadly this is the way that educated, enlightened & professional people have become
[Unnamed Reader - 14b4ce] about 1 year ago
Did you know that two thirds of the people aboard the Hindenburg survived?
mindjob about 1 year ago
Flying: where normal people turn into animals the split second the plane lands
Bilan about 1 year ago
Since the business class is closer to the front, it will be the horded masses trampling them.
FassEddie about 1 year ago
They get to open their exit doors first, too! Before the plane lands! Seems fair to me.
Moore 1 about 1 year ago
Well, at least your last meal was a good one with some good wine.
RobinA. Premium Member about 1 year ago
Channeling their inner George Costanza.
Mike Baldwin creator about 1 year ago
Hear, hear – It’s what they want to hear.
wellis1947 Premium Member about 1 year ago
Cattle class is good! my father was in a C – 124 Globemaster crash at Larson A.F.B. , Washington in the early ’50s – hundreds killed – the only survivors were in the “tail”…
well-i-never about 1 year ago
I’m having Warren Buffet take my elbow, or carry him if necessary.
keenanthelibrarian about 1 year ago
She’s telling them stuff they don’t already know?
PlatudimusAtom Premium Member about 1 year ago
Too many are too willing to make life one big cage fight.
wildlandwaters about 1 year ago
When I used to fly (which, thank goodness I don’t anymore), when it came time to leave, I just sat and waited until everyone was pretty much gone, and then calmly and peacefully left the plane. (Fortunately I was never confronted with an emergency situation)
eboosler Premium Member about 1 year ago
LOL. I had a friend who did that, knocked everyone out of his way and was the first to jump out of the plane. However, the slide had not deployed and he fell all the way to the ground, breaking his back. Karma…..
MT Wallet about 1 year ago
Today’s (Nov. 29) Bound and Gagged is something Wiley should have done.
bakana about 1 year ago
“Telling it like it IS” Airlines.
Amanda El-Dweek creator about 1 year ago
That’s a corporal work of mercy I’m pretty sure.
Fuzzy Kombu almost 1 year ago
Flying MuskAir (soon to be renamed as XAir)?
lindz.coop Premium Member almost 1 year ago
Business training.