Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for July 30, 2020

Tomorrow never knows .

And then one day, the first day of the rest of your life is the last day.

It’s only a day away…

And he still will not have returned the borrowed shovel.

Hey! I’ve been putting things off until tomorrow my whole life.

I’ll procrastinate tomorrow! :-D

Pig. You’ve accomplished a great deal that only a pig could do — tending your pork belly and curing the bacon.

Pig found the ultimate use of procrastination, put off the day of his demise forever! Pig the Immortal!

Well, Pig, there is one thing you can’t put off forever.

Carpe diem.

Pig! You are my muse!

tomorrow is the first day to put off the rest of your life…?

Pig always seems to find a way to distort Goat’s best impulses.

Pig always has a different perspective on things!

Yes Pig keep taking your Debbie Downer pills ! … Croc Power !

I don’t know, what does Shakespeare have to say?

Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,

Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,

To the last syllable of recorded time;

And all our yesterdays have lighted fools

The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!

Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player,

That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,

And then is heard no more. It is a tale

Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,

Signifying nothing.

Pigs is an inspiration for procrastinators everywhere!

Pig procrastinates, makes endless To-do-lists and he’s still insecure…

The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.

Goat should respond by saying that tomorrow is the second day of the rest of your life, and that the day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life, and so on.

Never put off until tomorrow what you can put off until day after tomorrow just as well. I think Mark Twain said that.

there’s always tomorrow…until there isn’t.

Today is also the last day of your life . . . . so far.

Good job Pig! You were in real danger of trying to accomplish something there.

Never put off til tomorrow what you can put off til next week.

Yesterday’s tomorrow is today’s deadline…

I know how you feel, Pig. I figured I’d be done with college by now if it wasn’t for my poor rescuing making.

Today is my last day of being a certain age. Tomorrow I will be one year older. There’s no putting it off, so I will just celebrate!

Pig’s biggest accomplishment will be when he becomes bacon, ham and pork chops!

That was great.

“So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34

A local business has the following “inspirational saying” on their sign:

~ Today is the best day of the rest of your life. ~

Somehow I feel like they may have misunderstood something …

Today is yesterday’s tomorrow, so tomorrow is already here.

My personal philosophy has always been, “Never do today what you can put off until tomorrow”.

Am I the only one saddened by the way a wonderful, deep, pithy quote from Beat poet Gregory Corso has been subsumed by the Hallmark “culture”?

What is your inspiration for living?

Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday.

Hilbert’s Hotel

Keep in mind, this half day is the first half day of the rest of your life. This quarter day is the first quarter of the rest of your life. This hour is the first our of the rest o your life. This minute is the first minute of the rest of your life. This second is the first second of the rest of your life. This millisecond is the first millisecond of the rest of your life. This microsecond is the first microsecond of the rest of your life. This nanosecond is the first nanosecond of the rest of your life. My unit converter refuses to go lower than nanosecond so I’m not sure if picosecond is the next smallest unit of time. But have I ruined the inspirational saying enough yet?

I was going to stop procrastinating today, but Goat has inspired me. So I’ll do it tomorrow.

I love ya, tomorrow…

Pig ain’t as dumb as he seems.

I used to think that Pig was the optimist in the strip. Some recent cartoons have made me think he’s changed, not for the better. This strip is just clouding the issue for me.

Pig is being too logical by half today. Maybe tomorrow he’ll be too logical completely! Time travel dizzies the mind, especially if it is feeble to start with!

Never put off until tomorrow what you can always put off until the day after tomorrow.