Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for November 28, 2022

Got bushwhacked and nuked off of Facebook. No warning or explanation, but I was able to download my data. And still couldn’t find a clue. Only possible hint involved a dormant group.

Then Twitter went to heck. So I nuked that account myself. Oddly enough, the data was much larger, though I’m sure I used Twitter much less over the same 10-year period.

All things considered, probably my best week in some years.

I don’t use Twitter, so Elon can’t use me.

At least you didn’t spend your afternoon on Twitter (I hope).

He was the world’s richest man. Maybe he still is. He lost a lot of money both with Twitter and with Tesla stock falling.

Pig shouldn’t need to helm a drive for Musk. It should be able to drive itself.

Twits

and we’re back… just got the dreaded “technical error” page again. :-/

I stepped away from Twitter 5 years ago – my life is much happier without it.

The only people I’d like to follow are dead, so it’s useless to me

pay for something i always got for free? never!

One of the few things I pay for on the internet is Gocomics, and I’m beginning to wonder about that.

The guy also spent 44 billion to buy it, so there’s that.

Saw something on the news that Musk announced how many new people signed up in the last few weeks as a positive thing. Lots of people like to go see a train wreck, so that must be a good thing too. And since this about Musk, here’s a dad joke to share: Guy #1 owns a Tesla and tells his friend about how it can drive itself. Guy #2 says ‘Wow, that’s so cool! Where’s it at?’ Guy #1: ‘I wish I knew.’

Not gonna lie, Elon Musk selling Stephen King he’d lower the price for verification is funnier than PBS has been in a while, because of the assumptions a) that it was about the price, and b) that Stephen King would need to pay to write for someone.

Mastodon

Never figured out why Elon would want to buy Twitter, I never had an interest to “twit” or is it “tweet”?

Amazing on a global scale that anyone with a house, a computer, and (I believe) a phone would describe themselves as having “almost nothing”.

Does he not realize that giving a blue check to anyone who gives you $8 makes the blue check meaningless? I mean the whole idea was “This person actually is that public figure.” Now it’s, “This person is nobody anybody ever heard of, but he gave me 8 bucks.”

Also, Twitter has no content of its own. The users provide all the content. So you’re charging the people who provide your content. Which means you’ll have fewer people, less content, and become less desirable to the advertisers who are your only real source of revenue.

I felt this way after I volunteered at a bicycle race event. I was spending my time helping to usher traffic for a bunch of rich cyclists wearing fancy cloths and riding insane bicycles. Oh and that one guy on a Barclays bike… and Boris Johnson.

Wrong booth pig. You need one with a sign overhead saying: Help 5 cents!!

On Twitter, or any social media platform, the users are the product and the advertisers are the customers. In that sense, you should be paying the users (like Youtube does) who attract more views.

Elon thought he was buying the ‘public square’, when it turned out he was buying a mall on the outskirts of town, where you go to sit in the food court & do some people watching. People aren’t going to pay $8 a month to get into political arguments & read recycled dad jokes. He’s saddled the company with so much debt, that bankruptcy is just a matter of time. He seems bent on accelerating the process by driving away his biggest advertisers with a mix of stupid business decisions & cozying up to the worst right wing trolls on the site. Most people still logging on just want to watch the train wreck.

Elon is also the name of a small college in North Carolina, but it isn’t very musky.

Musk needs help without a doubt, but it’s definitely not monetary…

But is he the richest PERSON?

The Count has never had a Twitter account. But The Count is getting one now. Never had Facebook, btw.

Twitter was in financial trouble before Elon showed up which was confirmed by Jack Dorsey. They used fake accounts to inflate the number of “eyeballs” promised to advertisers. His first order of business is to restore cash flow to keep the doors open.

I’ll never help Elon Musk or join Twitter!

Social media…this is the closest thing I have to it.

The beginning of wisdom …

Poor Ego; he just wants to be loved…

He’s also a sociopath. Even Pig should have been able to see that.

Twitter is what birds do outside of my window. Facebook is when I’m sitting back with my face in a book. My space is a garden. And my mother said that if I came upon a blog that I was to pick it up with a Kleenex and put it in the garbage. Life is that simple.

Yes Pig, you have.

From what I’ve seen, Elon is like a god to incels and has a big following of racists as well. If more of those birdbrains perch on Twitter than sign up for TRump’s net, I’ll bet the orange traitor will finally accept Elon’s invitation.

Never used Twitter, and quit Facebook a year and a half ago. My life is just fine.

Ya think?

Be a Substacker Goat. Then you too can become a billionaire!

We took FB app off of our phones hears ago. Only use it as a web page. Wow – the difference was amazing!! Everyone should do that.

I thought it was great when I heard Elon Musk was being shot into space. Then I heard he was coming back…

The only thing I’d help Mr Musk do is go back to South Africa.

I’m so glad I don’t own a cell phone.

Personally I think we are better off letting Elon Musk and the other utopian technocratic elitists go after each other. They are more likely to leave the rest of alone to actually help our fellow humans.

How do you make a small fortune with a social media company? Start with a large fortune.

That’s okay, Pig. It’s the thought that counts. And if this even got Elon’s attention, I’m sure he’d thank you….

Richest man in the world,My Foot.As far as I’m concerned,he’s 11 billion in debt and expects Denmark to pay for it

Elon University (a real one in North Carolina) would make better use of the money.