Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 21, 2024

In other words, he’s good for nothing.

I’m a Jack of all trades except for whatever trade I need for this job.

There’s not many jobs for a professional balloon traveler.

“I am a blank slate just waiting to be written on.”

“I have not yet realized my full potential!”

I have no preconcived ideas about how it should be done, so you can show me how you do it in this company.

You is needs to lists your plus points pig. You is makes great ham bacon and pork chops. MMMMM…

Notheeng is impossible. It is means me can achieves the impossible.

“I’m positive I’m adept at being unskilled”

There is no doubt about the amount of my adeptness.

Pigs not even adept at adapting his answer!

Pig your Job Skill … A Pawn for Stephan Pastis ;-)

“Plus I get dirty when I write.”

Pig must have a quite a complex if he’s writing that down.

Everybody starts out unskilled.

Adept at being the king of wishful thinking

I always had trouble applying for a job because I was a generalist. I didn’t have incredibly deep knowledge of anything, but some knowledge of a lot of things. Resume filters don’t like that.

And, once a person reaches a certain age, he, or she is automatically considered to be "UNemployable’, no matter how well versed one was in the company’s direction and policy, up until the day YOU reach that magical number..

he’s good. that’s not nothing.

But he has great potential! [ugh, now I need to go back to therapy… ;) ]

If he is applying for the Director of the DEI (fka AA) HR Department he’ll be hired on the spot.