Luann by Greg Evans and Karen Evans for August 14, 2019

What are pockets of which thou speakest, Tiffany? Trousers in days of yore had not pockets.

And it is enough to cover the shortage of her tuition and board.

That had BETTER NOT be a codpiece….

Boy, I’m not going to touch this one with a 10 foot pole.

Bets has loosened Gunther up considerably! Notice the change in the codpiece between the 1st and last panel.

D*** pouch the opposite of a fanny pack?

Well now. THAT settles what that “thing” is on Gunther. And It WASN’T a “codpiece.” It was a “Man Bag!”

And several “folks” called Gunther and Bets showing up to give Tiffany proceeds from the eBay sale. Kudos.Notice that there’s a certain “Mist”/Funk rising from that “funky” money? And I’m SORRY, but that doesn’t look like a whole lot of cash. The question NOW is: Will THAT be enough to cover Tiffany’s dorm room? I’m guessing it ain’t gonna be.

Things could get real UGLY real FAST from here to Saturday. Because if that AIN’T enough dough, then Tiffany faces the Nauseating “choice” of either moving back home with Tom and Ann, or taking (GAG) Les up on his “offer.”

I’m Really, Really, REALLY hoping that if that AIN’T enough money, that Bets offers to be Tiffany’s new roommate and shares expenses.

One more thing. I HOPE (GAG) Les isn’t watching what’s transpiring today. And think that Tiffany has just been given a tip. And demands HALF of it.

The “Moment of Truth,” I fear, is upon Our young heroine………, :(

Eeeeewwwww! Digging For Dollars. OR You have any hand sanitizer handy.

Tif, can you really afford to be picky? Cash is cash…

EW, Gunther. I understand your passion for authenticity, but you could have held the money in another pocket and I hope the sack was enclosed apart from your pants because I spy the whiff lines which indicate the money is smelly – hopefully from the smelly closed sack and not your family jewels via an opening in the sack. Tiff is brave to touch the money I wouldn’t if you had given me the money out of that sack right in the front of your family jewels. I figure in the olden times, money sacks were sewen onto the groin of men pants to discourage pickpockets from lifting money.

Should be Bets job to dig that money out.

A million and one uses for Lysol.

Truly ‘filthy’ lucre…

Nice to see that they are wearing appropriate Renaissance era clothes. Far too many of these Renaissance Fairs seem to confuse Renaissance (15thC – 16thC) with High Middle Ages (11th to 13thC).

okay. it was a man purse all along

Take your money, Tiff. Like most other funds I’m sure that Gunther’s pouch fund has been up and down, frequently.

I hope those are hundred dollar bills; anything else ain’t gonna pay for a years stay in the dorm. I think Gunther and Betts got the goldmine and Tiffany got the shaft.

If you think that feels crazy, reach a little further, and you’ll feel nuts.

Tiff in those days you did not have pockets.

In those days, men kept the hard stuff (currency, that is) in pouches hung from the waist.

Here is a Hieronomous Bosch painting illustrated how a fool and his money are soon parted…

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Conjurer_(painting)#/media/File:Hieronymus_Bosch_051.jpg

Historical accuracy would be gold pieces with mark of the king!

Money is #1 on the list of the dirtiest things we touch every day. After 1. money comes 2. computer keyboards, 3. cell phones, 4. toilets, 5. shopping carts, 6. remote controls, 7. whirlpool baths, 8. kitchen sinks, 9. kitchen sponges, 10. doorknobs, 11. refrigerator handles, and 12. shifter knobs. Makes me want to wash my hands.

I suppose panel 2 to 3 is the G-rated version of the money-shot. From the looks on bets face she really wants to play with the gun’s coin purse and jousting lance.

Tiffany be like, “Well, Gunth, I used to think you were kinda crazy. But now I clearly see you’re nuts…”

Odds Bodkins!

Gunther is also quite correct.

pocket: noun

a shaped piece of fabric attached inside or outside a garment and forming a pouch used especially for carrying small articles.

a bag or pouch.

whereas,

codpiece: noun

(in the 15th and 16th centuries) a flap or cover for the crotch in men’s hose or tight-fitting breeches, usually matching the costume and often decorated.

I don’t know but if I were her I wouldn’t want to touch that money… it doesn’t look very clean on the last frame! Eww!!!

Feeling a bit deflated now, Gunther?

If Tiff is worried, run it through the washer on gentle cycle and blot it dry with paper towels. It’ll clean up.

Hard for a thief to get the money, without Gunther noticing.

Too bad he didn’t maintain historical accuracy in his speech.

I am so NOT touching this one…

Bets is the best businesswoman here, 50% of the profits for the sale. Tiff should have negotiated 75% and a 25% fee. But being Luannverse it’s okay. Where will this go though is my curiosity? And, how does this portend the relationship of Bets and Gun(ther)? I know one thing, he seems so happy he could stomp grapes, and Bets, well she smolders prettily.

Surely Bets is having a lot of fun watching this whole scene. Tiffany expressions are gold and Gunther looks so clueless.

Except when it comes to verb conjugation, Gunther. “Eth” is third-person singular, present tense: “he/she/it maintaineth.” It’s not a verb ending that you just tack on willy-nilly to make yourself sound Shakespearian. Saying “I maintaineth” is as gross an error as saying “you is” or “I has.”

Sporran and Codpiece?

If Tif trusted Gunther and Betts to sell her “extra” lingerie on Ebay for her, wouldn’t she trust them to transfer her half of the proceeds from the paypal account set up to receive the payments for the lingerie to her bank account, and, just give her a record of everything?

I like the lettering. Walt Kelly did the same thing in Pogo with Deacon Mushrat’s lettering. You can hear the pious tone.

I’ve heard of a booby trap (thanks, Jessica Rabbit) but for this? What would it be called?

Guessed right!

Greg Evans does know that eBay prohibits the sale of used lingerie, right? Because before they did, most of it wasn’t being bought by women looking for bargains but by guys looking to satisfy their jollies.

Cash?

All you folks you think it’s a codpiece – didn’t you notice that it’s on a belt?

One more thing. Wasn’t that money was supposed to pay for Tiffany “Summer Stay” in her dorm room? What about the Fall Semester? And after That? Tiffany may to have to sell ALL her stuff and continue working like H3LL, just to make ends meet.

Somethings gotta give here and I DON’T mean Bets’ bodice…….,

:o uhhhh, someone needs to draw a line on this kind of stuff. I won’t accept money from boobs. I’m not accepting money from a sports cup.

“Wait a minute, I have some dimes in here…”

The other day, I made a joke about the codpiece being a fanny pack.

I now regret making that joke, and that this gag is partially my fault.

If anyone needs me, I will be purging that image from my mind with copious amounts of alcohol.

If someone was giving me money. I would care less if it had a fragrance!

I could make a joke about ‘Cold, Hard Cash’ … but the visual effect in Panel 3 says ‘cold’ is not involved! ‘Hard’, on the other hand … might need a slightly further reach!! ;)

“Maintaineth“ is third person singular. One should maintain proper grammar when maintaining historical accuracy.

He could have paid her off with a few chickens and a cow.

Odds Bodkins! Such a plethora of Renaissance nitpickery!! Is poor Mr. Evans safe nowhere from being stuck and bled by a thousand tiny “pricks” ?!

( yes, double entendre intended ).

First time I’ve seen turgid money! ;o)

What on earth is flying off from the bills and why??

Verily, it is a great wonder that the author hath used the older words in correct wise, forasmuch as most who do attempt this feat doth fail miserably, and their effort stinketh like unto the turd upon the roadway. Therefore be it known that he hath earned the Kudos and all the rights and privileges appertaining thereto.

Historical accuracy stinks.

Between the codpiece (?) and the smelly lucre, I don’t know what to say. Except, maybe I need some time off.

Accuracy, forsooth! That’s not what codpieces are for (a purse would hang at the side). He’s gone and used a “long s” ( ſ )for an “l”; and a third-person verb with “I”. “Unto” is good, but at such a period it would be spelled “vnto”.

Does Tiffany have to raise money for dorm only for the summer or for the entire year?

Is it still cold, hard cash when it is so warm?

Ew! Look at the swamp crotch funk basking from the $$$!

If we are being currently accurate, they would transfer Tiff’s potion of the profits to her PayPal account.

Geez! No money pouch? Surely they had those!

7

Gunther’s money bag…… blech.

Otherwise…. very entertaining. :)

Yes they had pockets – which were pouches! There was a time when ladies wore their “pockets” tied around their waists, under their skirts. “Lucy Locket lost her pocket.”

Well, at least the font in Gunther’s speech looks ancient…

Just count the money young lady….

Me thinkith I’m going to pukeith.

Brush up your Shakespeare. Start quoting him now. And remember. 4 quotes equals one gallon.

This is not the end of the United Colors of Betiffigun. Tiff will probably do a little mental dot-connecting soon, and, as others have predicted, launch her own lingerie line, with Gun sewing and Bets selling. The only question is what day the question is asked, and whether there may be humor to mine from the answer given.

If it’s green and it looks right why complain. A pile-o-cash is a pile-o-cash. They’ll take it in any state.

Bets and Gunther spend a lot of time alone together, but I never even see them holding hands. Come on kids, it’s not nice to fool Mother Nature.

Is that a gross smell wisp coming up from Gunther’s cash? Yuck.

Wow… Now I finally understand what the term “filthy lucre” means.

manpurse?

Ieth thinketh thateth iseth goodeth.

Gotta salute a cartoon character who can speak in Gothic script! And don’t look so grossed out, Tiff; it’s a wallet/purse (like a Modern fannypack only on the other side)….

Methinks this is what inspired “money laundering”.

There! I said it… I feel better.

“Excuse me while I whip this out.”