Herman by Jim Unger for June 17, 2020

OMG, no!

“Sorry, the manager said that you need at least two pair before he authorizes that amount ".

There’s a “Gunsmoke” episode where two scammers try to take $5,000 from the banker by one of them asking for a loan on his four aces poker hand, so he can call the pot.

Of course he loses to a straight flush and Matt Dillon has to figure it out before they skip town.

Better than aces and eights, I guess.

That’s not a very good hand.

Poker and other formally-recognized games of chance have rules. Banks and insurance companies do not. If they aren’t winning, they are allowed to change the rules.

What, he’s bluffing?

♫ Well the railwayman he cut the cards

And he dealt them each a hand of five

And for the Lord, he was praying hard

Or that train he’d have to drive

Well the Devil he had three aces and a king

And the Lord, he was running for a straight

He had the queen and the knave and nine and ten of spades

All he needed was the eight ♫

He’s wants to sell a fat chance, but he doesn’t have one.

Jacks or better to open. No.

You have as much chance getting the fifty bucks as winning with that hand!

Does the word fold mean anything to you chum?

Wise investor meets unwise methods.

He’s going to lose to a pair of 10’s Yep done it lots of times. Think I’ll go buy a scratch-off. Wish me well.

Not no, but hell no on the loan.

Am I the only one who doesn’t get this? Never played poker.