Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for April 13, 2022

Always be nice to your servers. You don’t know where their mouths have been.

Chef’s hat, apron, and taking orders means he’s probably the owner. It used to be that owners didn’t get tipped because they aren’t working for wages.

The only time I ever stiffed a server (not counting a handful of times when I knew the staff well and they deliberately wanted to give me a freebie, as a birthday gift or a thank you for something else I’d done for them) she had taken twenty minutes to come over to my table. And all the other tables were empty! Of course I didn’t tell her I’d be stiffing her. But the service continued to be so awful that I might as well have.

Like everything else in life: Positive in public, remediation in private. If your server/cook/bartender depend on tips, tip them like it’s part of the price, because it IS. If they screw it up, TELL them about it, but tip them the way you’d want to be tipped if the restaurant was falling to pieces around you and you were doing your very best.

I HAVE stiffed a waiter once or twice. But their behavior pretty much demanded that I do it. One of them insulted me and my date, denigrated our food choices, spent time with his friends while our dishes were sitting on the warming tray… and brought the food without bringing our drinks, didn’t give us silverware and took several minutes to return with the fork and knife. I left $1 as a tip and handed a note to the Maitre’D as we left.

Right you are, Rat—you should have waited until after the meal to tell him that he wasn’t getting a tip.

Don’t imagine it doesn’t happen!

BOSS spelled backwards is double S, OB.

I always worry about that.

I know waitresses, here they get paid less than minimum wage as they are tip dependent, and they say some people really do not tip, which I find astounding.

Pig and Rat don’t need to worry. Since the cook has no mouth there’s nothing spit can come from. He has a nose though – what’s “regoob”?

The tipping system should be done away with. Some traditions have lost their purpose.

While Pastis spelled backwards is sit sap. Hmmm…..

20 minutes to take the order is a valid complaint. But the only time that happened to me, we just left and ate around the corner. So I didn’t have to worry about not tipping.

Maybe Rat should keep his stupid mouth shut.

Rat is right there; attentive service earns the tip. And if you drop the food off and never come back, your tip will reflect that. Perhaps it’s time restaurants adopted the European model; pay the servers a reasonable wage and adjust your prices accordingly.

Recent strip was on the perils of coffee shops.Now justificaiton to not go back to restaurants, either.

Until servers are paid decently, protected from abuse and have their profession respected it’s not an industry I really want to support, anyway.

Right now they don’t have much recourse but the satisfaction of revenge.

No Shoes, No service, No service, No tip!

aw c’mon. what’s a little diarrhea.

Not funny

Uh, Mr Pastis, have you seen the latest ‘Sandra & Woo’? I hope so, considering you’re the subject(!) http://www.sandraandwoo.com/2022/04/13/1326-pearls-before-raccoons/

Ew. Ew. Ew

You never learn, do you, Rat?

Does it strike anyone else that the “SERVER” HAS NO MOUTH? Nice work Stephan.

Time to find a new restaurant.

Don’t be nasty to the hand that feeds you! ;)

Easy way around this.Order the fried spit.Heat kills germs.

I tip even if the service was sub-par, but might not if it was truly awful. I say might, because I’ve never actually encountered that level of “service” though one does hear stories. The worst “service” I ever had, I just got up and walked out of the restaurant. What were they gonna do, they never even took my order.

And “stressed” is “desserts” spelled backwards. So get some desserts and don’t be stressed.

I find it gratifying that Stephen covertly reads the comments, so I’d like to see more of Lil Guard Duck please!

Well if you order rotisserie meat, how else can they cook it ?

Back in the late 60s we visited some friends in Boston. We all went to a large market-like restaurant called Durgin Park with long plain wooden tables in the historic waterfront area. The menu only had a few items. A very crabby waitress with a cigaret dangling from her mouth came over to take our orders. One of the items was roast beef with potatoes and I asked if it were possible to get it as a sandwich to which she replied in a loud voice “Do you see it on the menu?” I said no and she said “Then we don’t have it”. So I ordered the roast beef. When it came it was almost too large for the plate and was by far the best I ever had ever before or since. It was so fantastically good that I left my normal tip for her.

“Skip food” backwards is “Doof piks”

A follow-up to yesterday’s strip to be sure.

Why is it called the wait staff?

Treat them well and (usually) they will treat you well….

Delays should be expected if the chef is also the waiter.