Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for January 18, 2023

  1. Coyote
    eromlig  almost 2 years ago

    Good evening, comics fans! I’ve decided to invent a new character to talk about; an entirely fictitious personage named Surly. Now, Surly is a crotchety old dude who doesn’t play well with others, so he stays home and plays with himself.

    He recently called his local highway department to complain about the “Deer Crossing” sign near his house. “Too many deer are crossing there and getting hit by cars,” he explained. “Please have them cross somewhere else.”

    He plugged his power strip into itself and couldn’t understand why he wasn’t getting any electricity.

    He worked at an auto dealership at one time as a technician. Once, when I took my car in for repair, I discovered it had gotten locked with the keys inside. When I arrived, he was working on the driver’s side door. I instinctively tried the passenger side door; it was unlocked. I pointed it out to him, and he said, “Yeah, I know – I got that side already.”

    Does anyone else know Surly? I’m sure there must be a lot more stories about him…

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  2. 7a3d35b05103496eecec311170ba260d
    Pickled Pete  almost 2 years ago

    No IRS agents were harmed in the telling of this tale.

    The teacher announced that to practice spelling, each member of the class would say what their fathers did for a living and then spell the occupation.

    Mary went first. “My Dad is a baker, b-a-k-e-r, and if he were here, he would give everyone a cookie.”

    Next came Tommy. “My dad is a banker, b-a-n-k-e-r, and if he were here, he’d give each of us a quarter.”

    Third came Jimmy. "My dad is an electrician.’’ But after struggling through a number of attempts to spell the word, the teacher asked him to sit and think about it for a moment while she called on someone else.

    She then turned to Johnny. “My dad’s a bookie, b-o-o-k-i-e,” Johnny said. “And if he were here, he’d lay you 8 to 5 that Jimmy ain’t never gonna spell electrician.”

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  3. B986e866 14d0 4607 bdb4 5d76d7b56ddb
    Templo S.U.D.  almost 2 years ago

    Would the IRS accept a cheque for $1,000,999 and 99¢?

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    jmolay161  almost 2 years ago

    If you owe the IRS that much money, you’re probably going to jail first!

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    boniface22  almost 2 years ago

    “on displayed”?

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    Zykoic  almost 2 years ago

    The IRS is probably using outdated software and old computers. But I hear they may install phones soon.

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    RLG Premium Member almost 2 years ago

    Would the IRS accept payment in pennies? (Hey, if you can afford $100 million, you can afford the freight train too.)

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    Johnnie Polo Premium Member almost 2 years ago

    Does the check holder have a bird on their shoulder?

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    tremaine53  almost 2 years ago

    How is an ATM publicly posting the wealth of its users NOT a violation of privacy?

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  10. Zero
    zerotvus  almost 2 years ago

    send it the ira..er.irs $600 at a time……..

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  11. Huckandfish
    Huckleberry Hiroshima  almost 2 years ago

    Like poets and possums, artists must suffer to do their best work. ~ Bob Ross, I never do my best work lol

    Take care, may suburban driveway basketball player Steve “I Make Every Shot When Nobody’s Looking And The Crowds In My Head Cheer” Sorensord be with you, and gesundheit.

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  12. 7a3d35b05103496eecec311170ba260d
    Pickled Pete  almost 2 years ago

    from – Tuco

    `

    31 minutes ago on Ripley’s Believe It or Not

    `

    Finally received a reply from the moderators:Your comments were flagged by other commenters on the site and your account has been suspended because it met the criteria of violation of our terms of service.My posts are rather benign, nothing I know that would have violated terms of service.

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  13. 7a3d35b05103496eecec311170ba260d
    Pickled Pete  almost 2 years ago

    from Tuco

    `

    24 minutes ago on Ripley’s Believe It or Not

    `

    Boudreau was having trouble sleeping at night. He wrote a letter to the Internal Revenue Service which read:

    “Dear Internal Revenue Service,

    For da tax year 2003, I underpaid my income tax, an’ I ain’t been able ta sleep well since. Enclosed is a check fo’ $200. Signed, Yours in Good Government, Boudreau"

    And he put at the bottom,

    “Mais, P.S. If I don’t sleep betta tonite, I’m gonna send you da rest.”

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  14. 7a3d35b05103496eecec311170ba260d
    Pickled Pete  almost 2 years ago

    from eromlig

    `

    about 7 hours ago on Ripley’s Believe It or Not

    `

    Good evening, comics fans! I’ve decided to invent a new character to talk about; an entirely fictitious personage named Surly. Now, Surly is a crotchety old dude who doesn’t play well with others, so he stays home and plays with himself.

    He recently called his local highway department to complain about the “Deer Crossing” sign near his house. “Too many deer are crossing there and getting hit by cars,” he explained. “Please have them cross somewhere else.”

    He plugged his power strip into itself and couldn’t understand why he wasn’t getting any electricity.

    He worked at an auto dealership at one time as a technician. Once, when I took my car in for repair, I discovered it had gotten locked with the keys inside. When I arrived, he was working on the driver’s side door. I instinctively tried the passenger side door; it was unlocked. I pointed it out to him, and he said, “Yeah, I know – I got that side already.”

    Does anyone else know Surly? I’m sure there must be a lot more stories about him…

     •  Reply
  15. 7a3d35b05103496eecec311170ba260d
    Pickled Pete  almost 2 years ago

    I’ve posted showing a petition going on over here on a couple other sites. Maybe some of you would like to do likewise!

    `

    Example – the one over at —>

    https://www.gocomics.com/pearlsbeforeswine/2023/01/18

    ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

    PETITION happening over at:

    https://www.gocomics.com/ripleysbelieveitornot/2023/01/18?ct=v&cti=2456384

    Check it out and spread the word. First comment.

     •  Reply
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    Charlie Fogwhistle  almost 2 years ago

    I’m in Houston today. Don’t know if I will have more to contribute.

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  17. Download
    artegal  almost 2 years ago

    And thus, LeBron’s Chinese sweat shop empire was born.

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    198.23.5.11  almost 2 years ago

    Well,I was going to pay my taxes in lump sum for the next 50 years,but I guess that’s out

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    WCraft Premium Member almost 2 years ago

    I wouldn’t buy anything endorses by Lebron. There are plenty of other athletes with class and who don’t try to foist their political and social views on us.

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  20. Bearfront
    paranormal  almost 2 years ago

    That ATM could be an invasion of privacy…

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  21. Bearfront
    paranormal  almost 2 years ago

    The IRS probably takes the money directly from the owers bank accounts…

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    markhughw  almost 2 years ago

    And when Magic Johnson was 19 he also turned down an offer from the new sneaker maker Nike for and endorsement in exchange for stock that would have been worth somewhere between a $billion and five $billion today.

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    Pickled Pete  almost 2 years ago

    Yesterday I received a reply from AMU Support Lead (Moderator) <moderator@gocomics.com> which simply gave me the Comment Policy.

    I have just replied to them:

    ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

    To Moderators:

    Thank-you for your reply.

    Yes, the Comment Policy, I have read it many times and believe I understand it quite well. However, sending it to me again does nothing to help me from repeating my previous violation as I have no idea what my infraction was.

    That being said, would you please explain the reason for my suspension. Thank-you.

    Respectfully – - – Peter – (https://www.gocomics.com/profile/3203203)
     •  Reply
  24. Missing large
    Buckeye67  almost 2 years ago

    If the IRS won’t take a check, will they except a credit card, I mean who walks around with more than a hundred million on them.

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    Scott S  almost 2 years ago

    As the saying goes, don’t let your mouth write checks your a** can’t cash!

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    stamps  almost 2 years ago

    OK, if your check for more than $100 million did not get accepted, send it to me. I’ll happily accept it.

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    alscoonz2  almost 2 years ago

    Those MSCHF people must be breaking some privacy laws, don’t you think?

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    alscoonz2  almost 2 years ago

    Here’s another golf joke. This is for Pykiff who liked the last golf joke. FORE: After a particularly poor round a golfer spotted a lake as he walked despondently up the 18th. He looked at his caddie – who might’ve been the caddie from my previous golf joke – and said, “I’ve played so badly all day, I think I’m going to drown myself in that lake.” The caddie, quick as a flash and dry as a bone, replied, “I’m not sure you could keep your head down that long, Sir.”

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    Gweedo -it's legal here- Murray  almost 2 years ago

    JanBic Premium Member had misconstrued 1 day ago

    @Pickled Pete

    Might want to consider becoming a paying PREMIUM MEMBER. Only $20 per year and well worth it for the benefits. I do not know if it gives you any more clout, but it should.

    You have no more sway with the company as a paid member than you do as a “freeloader”. I would occasionally write them about something or other but didn’t feel any preferential treatment cast my way. And you still get TIMED OUT when they don’t like your content. As a currently Free user I don’t see fit to complain as I did, when paying.

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  30. 7a3d35b05103496eecec311170ba260d
    Pickled Pete  almost 2 years ago

    from Tuco

    `

    about 4 hours ago on Ripley’s Believe It or Not

    `

    I’ve not posted dirty jokes. Someone has a vendetta

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  31. Birdman2
    Birdman47  almost 2 years ago

    A golf one for today……The golf course was haunted by a malicious, evil leprechaun who exploited the ambitions of the poorer players. He popped up beside one unfortunate man who was participating in a club competition.

    “Look,” he said, “if you agree never to court a woman, flirt with a girl or marry, I’ll help you win.”

    “Done,” agreed the young golfer. The leprechaun was very pleased with conniving ways, and chuckled merrily.

    When the golfer was in the clubhouse being praised by the other members, the leprechaun popped up on the shelf of the locker. “Hey,” said the little elf, “I have to have your name for my records. What is it?”

    “Father Murphy,” grinned the golfer as he adjusted his Roman collar.

    Birdman out.

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