Herman by Jim Unger for September 13, 2023

OMG is she for real?

if that’s your wife, Sir, then my condolences.

Scary

What the hell is that standing next to the guy? It looks like something that merged with a fly in the transporter beam.

In his case, insomnia would be a blessing. Imagine waking from a deep sleep and facing that.

“On the Vanity of Earthly Greatness”

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“The tusks which clashed in mighty brawls

Of mastodons, are billiard balls.

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The sword of Charlemagne the Just

Is Ferric Oxide, known as rust.

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The grizzly bear, whose potent hug,

Was feared by all, is now a rug.

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Great Caesar’s bust is on the shelf,

And I don’t feel so well myself.”

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— Arthur Guiterman

No, he’s standing at a urinal!

This statue is a bust.

Here, I thought it was Caesar stuck in concrete. The Roman Mafia killed him.

The wax museum in Victoria, BC has Cleopatra in her bath instead.

The public bath water should have been deeper. This is the real reason Caesar was killed.

He must be using lye soap. It sure took off a lot.

her hair looks like a piece of roadkill

She has her hair in curlers because she has plans later and wants to look her best then.

They stabbed Julius Caesar in the atrium, which is a very painful place to get stabbed.

Big Julie got it in the rotunda.

He’s taking his bath toga.

Whatever he’s on I don’t want any. Plus, obviously has a really bad vision issue.

Classic Victor Borge joke: Mozart was a bust, meaning he only went down to the shoulders. This distressed his wife, who went all the way down to the floor.

Brutus used to help him in the tub, too. Leading to one of Caesar’s most famous quotes, “That Brutus, he’s always got my back!”

The women in this strip come in one size. Ethel Mertz.