Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for February 03, 2024

  1. Ding a ling
    BasilBruce  10 months ago

    Throw in “No lies” and “No acts of treason” and you’ve got my vote.

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    BE THIS GUY  10 months ago

    I have 6 places with great pizza in a 15 minute radius and I don’t want to be hugged by strangers.

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    Asharah  10 months ago

    Does the Constitution say the President has to be human?

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    David_the_CAD  10 months ago

    My fear with Pig running would be that the smart people would vote for Pig, and we all know how many idiots there are in the world (USA) to vote for the dictator want to be.

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    Renatus Profuturus Frigeridus Premium Member 10 months ago

    At least Pig have a clean record and is younger than the two real candidates.

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    Nobody_Important  10 months ago

    I would vote for Pig!

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    ronaldspence  10 months ago

    you got my vote!

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    Concretionist  10 months ago

    I could happily live the rest of my life without pizza. Unless I started to think about missing one. Of course, I never even heard of pizza until I was in my 20s. Hugs not so much.

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    notmoving Premium Member 10 months ago

    Pig 2024!!

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    TampaFanatic1  10 months ago

    Seems more like an ad for Papa Johns.

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    GreasyOldTam  10 months ago

    I’m voting for Pig. I’m not sure he’s smart enough to lie, and treason is too much work.

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    Hello Everyone  10 months ago

    What about Rat? He ran for President in 96, so he has more experience than Pig! And there shouldn’t be such big rivalries in the same house!

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    Alyssa the Great  10 months ago

    Better than any of the current options!

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    blunebottle  10 months ago

    Nailed it!

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    Gent  10 months ago

    So it going to be Pig vs Rat this year eh.

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    donlackie  10 months ago

    That’s the most ridiculous thing I ever heard.Pizza is just fine

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    Purple People Eater  10 months ago

    If you have pineapple on the pizza, then Rat won’t vote for you (and neither will I).

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    viewer1 Premium Member 10 months ago

    Looks like Pig’s definition of basic needs is better pizza, more hugs. I think we can all agree on those two points. :)

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    iggyman  10 months ago

    I had pizza last night, and hugs are great! I’m with you Pig!

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    vacman  10 months ago

    Great prank!

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    some idiot from R'lyeh Premium Member 10 months ago

    Better pizza and health care!

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    markkahler52  10 months ago

    Read “Poorcraft”: Get a head start….

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    oakie817  10 months ago

    Taylor Swift 2024

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    Znox11  10 months ago

    If you really want the votes, change that to More Ammo, Higher Capacity MAGAzines…too subtle?

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    rgulyash  10 months ago

    As long as it’s thin crust

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    Keno21  10 months ago

    Mandatory Taco Tuesdays!

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    mrwiskers  10 months ago

    I like the idea that the purpose of our government should be to serve and protect its citizens.

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    Count Olaf Premium Member 10 months ago

    More hugs (and kisses) was/is a huge part of Dopey Joe’s agenda but The Ministry of Truth has worked hard to redact all existing footage of it.

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    Willywise52 Premium Member 10 months ago

    The Pig is already running in 2024.

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    Ellis97  10 months ago

    I’ll never run for office. It’s too boring and political.

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    Simon Seamount  10 months ago

    Pig will only win if he is descended from a Plantagenet because only Plantagenets have ever won the US president elections.

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    timinwsac Premium Member 10 months ago

    Stephan Pasties for president 2024.

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    Squoop  10 months ago

    Ironically, one of our 2024 candidates wants better pizza (& hamburders) and the other one wants more hugs.

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    Moore 1  10 months ago

    I vote for that

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    ladykat  10 months ago

    I like Pig’s election promises.

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    jel354  10 months ago

    At least one thing has cheese.

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    Goat from PBS  10 months ago

    I would vote for Pig. He’s better than… other presidents.

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    PoodleGroomer  10 months ago

    Pig will have to work on alternate sources of pizza ham, Canadian bacon, pepperoni, and sausage. Everyone expects the president to sacrifice too much.

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    smoore47  10 months ago

    Man, some of you are just cold hearted. Those b****ing and moaning about government “welfare” and handouts might consider the following:

    Supplemental Security Income (SSI) – Provides cash payments to disabled, repeat, disabled children, disabled adults, and persons over 65 who are citizens or nationals of the United States.

    Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) – provides food benefits to low-income families to supplement their grocery budget so they can afford the nutritious food essential, repeat, essential to health .

    The Special Supplemental Nutrition Program for Women, Infants, and Children (WIC) provides federal grants to states for supplemental foods, health care referrals, and nutrition education for low-income pregnant, breastfeeding, and non-breastfeeding postpartum women, and to infants and children up to age 5 who are found to be at nutritional risk.

    The Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF) program provides states and territories with flexibility in operating programs designed to help low-income families with children achieve economic self-sufficiency. States use TANF to fund monthly cash assistance payments to low-income families with children, as well as a wide range of services.

    It seems to me that these programs are providing help to the disabled, those in need of food assistance, and low income families with children who are hurting. I have no problem with using my tax dollars for these purposes and, to me, this is exactly what government should be doing instead of giving tax breaks to billionares and corporations who do not need that type of government “welfare”.

    Boomer, liberal, and proud of it.

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    KEA  10 months ago

    most popular candidate since Pat Paulson

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    [Unnamed Reader - bddb15]  10 months ago

    Let’s have pig start a new party!!!

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    jearnold15  10 months ago

    Good for you, Pig! This world would be a better place if more humans could focus on what’s really important.

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    del_grande Premium Member 10 months ago

    I can see it now: “What caused the end of the Pig Party: somebody asked him what he meant by ‘better pizza’.”

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    dgaietto22  10 months ago

    I’d vote for him.

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    OBBWG  10 months ago

    Where does Pig stand on pork barrel spending?

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    HOTLOTUS1  10 months ago

    I VOTE FOR PIG!

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    mindjob  10 months ago

    That won’t work because this generation is more concerned with global warming caused by pizza ovens.

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    Algolei I  10 months ago

    But will he hug the flag?

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    Hoosier Guy  10 months ago

    Is Alfred E. Newman running for President this year?

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    Joe Cooker Premium Member 10 months ago

    I think I’d prefer more pizza and better hugs.

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    Thomas R. Williams  10 months ago

    Pig joins a whole string of cartoon characters who ran, including Pogo [“I Go Pogo”] and even “Krazy Kat” who once threw their “Het” in the “Ring”.

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    Brilliant_Birdie   10 months ago

    Depends, what pizza place will provide?

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    Kle1  10 months ago

    Always good to turn a venue for short-form amusement into a demented and futile political rant arena. Well done, everyone.

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    marilynnbyerly  10 months ago

    Two things that make life worth living. The basics just keep you alive.

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    zeexenon  10 months ago

    I’m in! I’ll vote dozens of times.

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    luluputu  10 months ago

    I’d vote for pig any day. He is so sweet!

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    DonCoyote®  10 months ago

    Every individual is personally responsible for their own basic needs.

    Only Socialists and Communists RELY on the Government for basic needs.

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    Otis Rufus Driftwood  10 months ago

    We could use more hugs.

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    unfair.de  10 months ago

    Pig as President and Goat as his Chief of Staff. That would improve the world.

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    AMBER1  10 months ago

    Pig got my vote! :)

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    artjohn42  10 months ago

    Change “more hugs” to “free beer” and you might have a viable platform!

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    thedogesl Premium Member 10 months ago

    Good luck with that. Likely GOP responses:“Better pizza would mean a Big Government takeover of your pizza. Do you want some bureaucrat telling you what kind of pizza you can eat? They’ll have to take my greasy thin crust pizza from my cold dead fingers! It’s a psyop by the liberal woke pizza mob to make you eat fancy overpriced pizza with arugula on it!!” Ted Cruz will push an image on social media of a pizza with a gun on top of it and the slogan “come and take it!” Faux News will warn that it’s an attempt to get illegal alien pizza through our borders and poison our blood with communist cheese.

    As for “more hugs”: “woke transsexual groomers want to touch our children!!!!!!”

    Also Taylor Swift Hunter Biden’s laptop George Soros Rothschild Space Lasers.

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    elgrecousa Premium Member 10 months ago

    What’s interesting here is that even Pig has his priorities. I wonder who doesn’t.

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    Viktor Sirin  10 months ago

    Amazing how so many likes are showing up from account’s that haven’t been active for months.

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    pamela welch Premium Member 10 months ago

    Pig, I like the way you think ♥

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    Swirls Before Pine  10 months ago

    Well, Pig has zero experience as a public servant, so he’s right up MAGA’s alley

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    JPuzzleWhiz  10 months ago

    Uh, Pig?

    Are you aware that they put bacon, ham and sausage on pizzas?

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    Preziosilla  10 months ago

    Who are you, Patrick McDonnell?

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    eddi-TBH  10 months ago

    I may have to vote for a third party this year, we could all use more hugs.

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    Ukko wilko  10 months ago

    B.S.

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    rgcviper  10 months ago

    How and where do I cast my vote for you, Pig?

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    LrdSlvrhnd  10 months ago

    You had me at pizza, you lost me at hugs. Eww, stay away from me, random people.

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