Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for April 01, 2024

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    diazch408  8 months ago

    That is a tough question.

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    rmremail  8 months ago

    It’s vacuum packed.

    So if you really suck at it, it will be just like new.

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    sirbadger  8 months ago

    I suspect that people in YouTube videos are using a super-thin material that folds down thinner.

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    Cactus-Pete  8 months ago

    What are those signs for?

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    Superfrog  8 months ago

    I’m sure there are people who can do it but they’re not telling for fear of being burnt as a witch.

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    Uncle Kenny  8 months ago

    I was expecting something about understanding women.

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    AllishaDawn  8 months ago

    My mom can do it with her eyes closed. I have watched her do it many times, and I still just roll mine into a ball!

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    Firebat  8 months ago

    My better half seems to have mastered that one. I was amazed first time I saw her ‘pull it off’.

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    Concretionist  8 months ago

    They use hydraulic presses.

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    Mediatech  8 months ago

    Who folds them? Laundry basket. Washer. Dryer. Back on the bed.

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    Harumph  8 months ago

    My mom taught me to fold fitted sheets. Not difficult.

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    PraiseofFolly  8 months ago

    Something like “What is the sound of one hand clamping?” Is easy-peasy, I guess.

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    Richard Howland-Bolton Premium Member 8 months ago

    Yay Entropy!!!!

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    stillfickled Premium Member 8 months ago

    A girl I had worked with started to explain to me how to fold a fitted sheet. I ended up tuning her out. I still don’t know how and don’t care.

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    billyc9501  8 months ago

    Google How to fold a fitted sheet video

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    edbeat  8 months ago

    Nice to see that Amazon delivers to mountaintop locations.

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    njchris  8 months ago

    There is a Youtube video that shows how to do it. I still cannot do it

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    erik.vanthienen  8 months ago

    He just had to underline the word “great” on his sign!

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    Pat S Premium Member 8 months ago

    google ‘consumer reports how to fold a fitted sheet’ the video frrom -6/24/2014 is better.

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    GreenT267  8 months ago

    Unfortunately, they don’t seem to make “fitted” sheets any more. At least I don’t think “fits from 8” to 20" constitutes a fitted sheet. Unless you have a mattress 20" thick. Anything less means having to retuck the corners every day.

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    david_42  8 months ago

    Folding a fitted sheet like it was in the package is simple, one corner at a time.

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    tpcox928  8 months ago

    Amen on the fitted sheet! Impossible.

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    Redd Panda  8 months ago

    Years ago… it might have been “How to fold a roadmap, back the way it came.”

    “Gorsh Olive, willya folds me roadmap fors me?”

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    TMMILLER Premium Member 8 months ago

    It’s very easy to do. Grab all the corners, bring together, lay flat. Fold in half, roll in a ball, carry upstairs and make bed.

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    SusieB  8 months ago

    It used to be doable on the older sheets that had only the corners elasticized. The newer ones have elastic on all sides and they can’t be folded. I just try to shape it best I can into a small rectangle

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    sandpiper  8 months ago

    It that’s the guy’s biggest problem, he obviously hasn’t read the news lately.

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    akachman Premium Member 8 months ago

    Detroit local TV late 1950s, The Lady of Charm. She could do it and my mom watched. My mom could fold a fitted sheet just like it came out of the package. Sadly, none of her children learned the trick.

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    Timothy Madigan Premium Member 8 months ago

    you fold fitted sheets like a regular sheet. You just use the top of the corner as the actual corner with the rest hanging inside.

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    tenebraesum  8 months ago

    Folding fitted sheets … that’s dark, dark unmentionable magic.

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    Solomon J. Behala Premium Member 8 months ago

    Isn’t it folded around a piece of cardboard?

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    timclancy Premium Member 8 months ago

    I’ll buy that!

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    ladykat  8 months ago

    He’s right. It can’t be done.

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    Maester Brow Premium Member 8 months ago

    It can be done, but the only hint I’ll give is that at one point you should have a skinny triangle! ;-)

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    oish  8 months ago

    I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit, and on the slitted sheet I sit.

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    chaosed2  8 months ago

    I can fold a fitted sheet, but it simply isn’t worth the effort v reward.

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    andersjg Premium Member 8 months ago

    The answer isn’t 42…

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    phileaux  8 months ago

    Martha Stewart showed how. You figure out to fold into long strips then roll up together like a beach blanket. Easier to pick and choose if you have multiple.

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    oakie817  8 months ago

    fold? sheets?

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    mousefumanchu Premium Member 8 months ago

    Just roll it up and stuff it in closet.

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    Raging Moderate  8 months ago

    For that, there’s YouTube.

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    Redd Panda  8 months ago

    Yah jes’ take your bottom sheet and rolls it up in a ball, like a big pair o’ Granny Panties.

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    Cozmik Cowboy  8 months ago

    As young man between band gigs I sometimes worked for my landlady, who owned a commercial laundry (which she was quite capable of operating alone, but would give us poor starving hippies work whenever we needed it). Her main account was the bed linens for a local hotel, and she taught me how to fold a fitted sheet perfectly.

    I forgot how decades ago, and am back to rolling them…….

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    Can't Sleep  8 months ago

    I know how to fold one, but I was sworn to secrecy.

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    Silence Dogood Premium Member 8 months ago

    Oh, this strip gives me the sheets!

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    ComicsBinger Premium Member 8 months ago

    I talked to a woman who said it was easy. Then she said putting a cover on a duvet was simple. I could have slapped her.

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    djudkins  8 months ago

    Never bother to fold them, I just wash, dry and put them back on the bed.

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    aphasia219  8 months ago

    OK, kids, listen up: You take the fitted sheet and spread it on something — a bed or, if you have one, a big table — upside down. Then you make sure the corners are squared flat. Then you fold the thing. It isn’t as flat as when you buy it, but it’s flat. Why fold it? Because the linen closet is a lot easier to navigate when the stuff in it is flat. And no, I don’t have an engineering degree or experience in the clothing-folding industry. I just figured it out after many years of frustration. One advantage of getting very, very old.

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    mistercatworks  8 months ago

    It’s because they are packed in low-Earth orbit in a high-vacuum facility. :)

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    Bilan  8 months ago

    I found an article on how to fold them. Couldn’t understand it. Suspect it was just gibberish intended to pull our leg.

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    Richard S Russell Premium Member 8 months ago

    Any significance to the concept of a “correct” way to fold a fitted sheet being published on April Fools’ Day?

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    Sherlock007 Premium Member 8 months ago

    My question would be, if the Universe has an end, what’s on the other side?

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    willie_mctell  8 months ago

    You need a sheet board.

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    Stan McSerr  8 months ago

    Ok, here is how you fold fitted sheets. I will only explain this once. First you take the sheets out of the dryer. Second you pull out all the clother that gets twisted into the corners. Third, now listen carfully, you ball it up and throw it into the linen closet. Easy-peasy.

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    Redd Panda  8 months ago

    Ya takes a piller case and stuffs yer sheets and the other piller case into the first one. Neats as ya might want her.

    My Honey played a good one on me this Morn. I came into the kitchen. She was there with a suitcase and her coat on. “I’m leavin’ and I ain’t a comin back”. I was just sayin’ how I was gonna miss her, when she started to laugh, “Gotcha! April Fools!” Well, was good for a few seconds.

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    andrew.scharnhorst  8 months ago

    Coincidentally, I was wondering that very same thing just yesterday as I folded some laundry.

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    keenanthelibrarian  8 months ago

    That’s a little mystery. A great mystery is like explaining why no battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy .. or why people keep voting for them, ’cause it only encourages them – something like that.

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    eboosler Premium Member 8 months ago

    Amen to that!!! Martha Stewart once demonstrated on tv and I still couldn’t do it.

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    awgiedawgie Premium Member 8 months ago

    My ex-girlfriend once told me I was the only person she had ever met who could fold a fitted sheet neater than when it came out of the package. Even her mother was amazed.

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    tee929  8 months ago

    My wife makes it look really easy, but I found that if I pull them out of the dryer and put them on the bed, I DON’T HAVE TO FOLD THE DARN THINGS!

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    eddi-TBH  8 months ago

    Just keep tucking it into it self until the bundle disappears into a black hole.

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    Surly Squirrel Premium Member 8 months ago

    Folding sheets? Why? I buy my sheet sets one at a time and wash them once a week. Into the washer, then the dryer, then back onto the bed.

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    paullp Premium Member 8 months ago

    I can fold one up into a flat shape that will fit reasonably well into my linen closet. Is it perfect, like it just came out of the package? Of course not. Do I want to waste time and effort on such a project? Of course not.

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    JH&Cats  8 months ago

    Who’s gonna know or care what the inside of your linen closet looks like? The County Closet Inspector is required to keep all records confidential, and the photos are encrypted.

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    aussie399 Premium Member 5 months ago

    So WHY fold, or try to, a fitted sheet?You see it so often in comics but nowhere else.JUST BUNDLE THEM UP. After you’ve ironed your socks, underwear and towels of course

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    aussie399 Premium Member 5 months ago

    Yes, it is that pointless and unfunny

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