Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for May 26, 2024

My wife.

It is all of them legs and eyes, they can be way too creepy.

I don’t kill the daddy long legs. They eat the less desirable spiders.

I catch and release….

My thoughts exactly. I like spiders.

One morning I thought I saw a brown mouse scurrying across my bedroom floor. It was a very big brown spider. I made it two dimensional. Sadly, no way to ID it. I don’t mind the outdoor guys. They keep the mosquitoes in check a bit.

I had a wolf spider that insisted on getting into my house . I had to kill it. Had no choice. You weren’t there!

Hoomans is so dumb.

Actually Blanche, spiders (like snakes) are not poisonous – they’re venomous. Very few species represent a threat to us via their bite. And yes, without our favourite web-builders, we wouldn’t be able to move for the millions of insects out there… Plus, they work cheap! Please don’t squish…

I always make sure to let any bugs I find live, unless they’re either poisonous or invasive. Even if it is a giant scary looking spider.

Yeah – Nope. you stay out there, i’ll stay in here. and we’ll all be happy

Wiz, just send the spider to France. There it might meet it’s soulmate and get married and become newlywebs. And there they can have all the French Flies that they want. Also, they wont need to worry about any Frogs eating them. For the French do love to eat frog legs.

Yeah, humans.

I guess my cat is human.

Although, in one thing I do agree with the authors, but not for the same reasons: Humans can be very, very dumb.

I could use it to scare my sister.

One of the standard husband duties: (1) Open jars, (2) Take out the trash, (3) Kill the spiders.

I never kill spiders. I actually save them from drowning in my pool. lol

Animal abuser are not human.

If you don’t like spiders, you better like what spiders eat!

The problem is Wiz, it’s probably a house spider. You’ve just condemned it to death. Slowly.

Unless you ingest, it’s not poisonous; it’s venomous.

Either you hate them or you love them!!!!!

Burn the house down! Just get rid of it!

All creatures great and small.

I could always tell the size of the spider by how loud my wife screamed.

Strip of the day.

I read that there are many species of spiders that are venomous, and could kill humans, but their fangs are not able to penetrate our skin!

In South America they use Tarantulas kill roaches.

I kill ticks….have never figured out what they are good for yet….

Sad thing is that house spiders are different that outside spiders and you are just going to kill them by doing that too…..

I usually leave them alone if they’re not bothering me.

I’ve managed to convince my wife to allow garden spiders to live in our yard. They are beautiful and make make one of the most amazing webs! I just hope they aren’t picked off by birds.

Kinda sounds like, “Oh NO!! A Jew! Kill it, Kill it!” doesn’t it? Doesn’t matter what their politics, their lives, their accomplishments, if they live here or there, some people are just taught to hate, no matter what.

I have an agreement with the spiders in my garage. They kill all of the pests they encounter, don’t crawl over my bike and spin webs on her, stay out the main living area (or don’t be so obvious about it) and they live in peace.

Irrational prejudice.

Say her last two words of dialogue fast enough…!

Spiders is steenky cannibalistic creatures creatures from the infernal depths. Better SPLAAATS em eevil critters when ya sees em.

If that little spider were only half the size of wizards, it would eat him instantly

One comic I saw was a guy who spared a spider when his wife wanted him to kill it. Next evening they got robbed at gunpoint til a sniper bullet hit the robber. The husband looked and saw the spider he saved with a rifle give a thumbs up

I used to like Blanche over spiders until I researched more about them. Now I’m fine with them (as long as they don’t walk on me).

Well, Blanche, there’s bound to be something out there that feels the same way about you. But you don’t mind being squished for no reason, do you?

I’m with the Wiz. Spiders don’t generally bother humans, and they eat the bugs that do bother us. I generally catch them and take them outside. And don’t even get me started on bees, who pollinate our food crops and never sting unless you try to pet them.

I love spiders