The Born Loser by Art and Chip Sansom for June 13, 2024

Is there even any meat in the salad? Like chicken or little bits of bacon?

Obviously

Either Gladys didn’t feel like cooking or, suddenly, she became vegan.

Involuntary diet.

In other words he wants you to feed him a four course meal because he’s hungry.

Does it at least have little cubes of meat?

It is Gladys’ version of rabbit food that she is trying her best to sell, but Brutus isn’t buying it at all.

To be, or not to be. That was the question!

got you

I made salad last night and tried something new. To accompany the salad I put some slices of ham on a cracker, added cheese and melted it in the microwave, and topped each one off with a small slice of watermelon. Turned out to be pretty good stuff.

“You go out, you order a steak, what do they do? They bring you a salad. They don’t even charge you for it, cause it ain’t worth anything, cause it ain’t food. Salad is a promissory note that food will soon arrive.”

- John Pinette – Around the world in 80 buffets.

Cover mine up so you can have it for lunch tomorrow. I’ll be back in a bit.

throw a bag of croutons on that salad…

Poor Brutus. All he wants is a hamburger, fries and a milkshake.

Come on Brutus. Open a can of Spam and enjoy. Mother Gargle could be sitting beside you. Gooble-gobble, gooble-gobble. One of us – Freaks.

This is not food. This is what food eats.

I actually enjoy a good salad sometimes.

From the profiles of these two, small salads for dinner is just about right.

Salad? SALAD???? Salad isn’t food. Salad isn’t a meal. Salad’s the stuff that comes with the food. Salad is a promisary note that something good is going to happen… and I should just wait right here. You go out, you order a steak. What do they do? They bring you a salad. They don’t even charge you anything for it, cause it ain’t worth anything, cause it ain’t food!

Disappointing huh Brutus ?

Brutus is put on diet. The old battle axe got to her daughter.

she must not be too hungry… :j

I keep pepperoni and sausage and hot dogs and such in the fridge… in case this prank gets pulled.

I would feel the same, Brutus.

I’d order a pizza if I were Brutus

As the late comedian John Pinette said, “A salad is a promissory note that food is coming.”

I bet Brutus is dreaming of that Cheeseburger in Paradise right about now

Relax, that’s just your appetizer. You’re free to go to the restaurant of your choice after you’ve finished the salad.

Brutus should be glad that Gladys served something she couldn’t burn. But this is not a problem. Brutus will just go get all the toppings he used on his ice cream in Saturday’s strip and turn it into a real meal!

That’s the difference. To a woman, salads and soups qualify as entrees. To a man, they’re great appetizers, but need to be served along with an actual full-sized meal.

You don’t want Gladys to overtax herself do you?

Consider yourself lucky, it’s hard to mess up salad.

That’s the only thing she can make without burning it.

Just add some dressing to it, Brutus. That’ll improve the taste.

When one makes a small dinner salad, it is the first course.

Today’s Andy Capp has good advice for Brutus

Maybe he can have some Jello for dessert. With fruit. If Gladys is eating a small salad too, there must be health reasons. She likes her food, too. They are both belly-up to the table.

A little healthier eating won’t hurt you, Brutus.