Crankshaft by Tom Batiuk and Dan Davis for July 19, 2024

  1. Mromalley
    J.J. O'Malley  4 months ago

    TOMORROW: Eugene puts the canoe out in the water to see if it floats. Don’t you dare miss a single action-packed panel.

     •  Reply
  2. Missing large
    wooleys2001  4 months ago

    Great deal. Well done, young man.

     •  Reply
  3. Josette   13 march 2016   c
    Bill Thompson  4 months ago

    “But first, sign this waiver that protects us from the consequences of your self-destructive behavior!”

     •  Reply
  4. Missing large
    billsplut  4 months ago

    “Heck, if you drown, we can bury you in it!”

     •  Reply
  5. Josette   13 march 2016   c
    Bill Thompson  4 months ago

    “But we charge double for oars!”

     •  Reply
  6. Gentbear3b1a
    Gent  4 months ago

    What? Who says anytheeng like that to a customer? It a crime to let customer use it if you theenks “if it floats…”. Because if it no float then customer can drowns an dies. And you theenks this a funny joke? This not funny. This outright outrageous. Using it for free me bear foot.

     •  Reply
  7. Missing large
    wfhite  4 months ago

    Why am I getting a feeling of tragedy by the end of the week?

     •  Reply
  8. 20190221 060717
    Brian Perler Premium Member 4 months ago

    “Of course, if it DOESN’T float, we’ll have to charge you. Leave your wallet here, just in case. Good luck out there, Fredo.”

     •  Reply
  9. Missing large
    billsplut  4 months ago

    CRANKERBEAN: Man tries to rent a canoe. PHANTOM: Giant Musk-Bot destroys the jungle! CRANK: Man tries again to rent canoe. JUDGE PARKER: Main character is DEAD—okay, I guess not? CRANK: Canoe rental continues. MARY WORTH: Dead fish gets burial at sea! CRANK: Canoe rental. BLONDIE: Apparently—her cupcakes are good! CRANK: Oh for Cry Eye, MORE CANOE?

     •  Reply
  10. Unnamed  1
    Doctor Toon  4 months ago

    Free is my favorite fee

     •  Reply
  11. Monty python french1
    French Persons Premium Member 4 months ago

    Panel 1: Pre-WWII ? So this means that…. Panel 2: He’s around 110 years old now?

     •  Reply
  12. Missing large
    goboboyd  4 months ago

    Your dapper bowtie, the pretty bow in her hair, the charming view over the boat’s bow.

     •  Reply
  13. Missing large
    MichiganMitten  4 months ago

    Not really an endorsement. Not approved by the rental agency’s insurance company.

     •  Reply
  14. Missing large
    jahays1  4 months ago

    I am guessing he did not pay a few strips back.

     •  Reply
  15. Dr who weeping angel  1
    Blaidd Drwg Premium Member 4 months ago

    The canoe is now a rowboat??

     •  Reply
  16. Missing large
    Crandlemire  4 months ago

    Rose and Tom paddled gently across the lake, the rhythmic dip of their oars breaking the serene surface of the water. The air was filled with the scent of pine and the distant calls of birds, creating a perfect backdrop for their journey back in time.

    As they glided further from the shore, Tom couldn’t help but chuckle. “Remember how we used to race to that little island in the middle of the lake?” he asked, his voice filled with fondness.

    Rose smiled, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “And how you always let me win,” she replied, her laughter mingling with the soft sounds of the lake.

    They reached the center of the lake and paused, letting the canoe drift lazily. Tom leaned back, his hand trailing in the cool water. “It’s amazing how some things change so much, while others stay exactly the same,” he said, his gaze fixed on the distant horizon.

    Rose reached out and touched his hand, her fingers warm and reassuring. “What’s important is that we’re here together,” she said softly.

    Tom nodded, his heart full. “Here’s to old canoes and even older memories,” he said, lifting an imaginary glass.

    They sat in companionable silence, the past and present intertwining seamlessly. As the sun dipped lower, casting a golden glow over the lake, Rose and Tom felt a profound sense of peace. They had weathered the storms of life together, and now, in this quiet moment, they were reminded of the enduring power of love and the simple joys that time can never take away.

    With a contented sigh, Tom dipped his oar back into the water, and together, they paddled slowly back to shore, their hearts light and their spirits rejuvenated.

     •  Reply
  17. Img 5203
    rockyridge1977  4 months ago

    He knows the ole guy knows what he is doing!!!!!!

     •  Reply
  18. Img 3606
    FassEddie  4 months ago

    Ooh’ he’s a punter, is he? A canoodler?

     •  Reply
  19. 250
    ladykat  4 months ago

    I hope it floats.

     •  Reply
  20. Missing large
    lemonbaskt  4 months ago

    surprise ending jasons mother comes out of the water and snuffs out the old codger too bad no alligators in ohio

     •  Reply
  21. Luhm 2 27 10
    Mopman  4 months ago

    How generous of him. An old rowboat that has been sitting there for 50 years that the company doesn’t own, and he’s not going to charge the guy.

     •  Reply
  22. Monty python french1
    French Persons Premium Member 4 months ago

    Cue up Jason Vorhees and “Friday the 13th” sound effects..

     •  Reply
  23. Red skelton
    Daltongang Premium Member 4 months ago

    Well after all these years, if the boat is a rocking, the police will come knocking, cause Eugene is going to be all alone in that boat.

     •  Reply
  24. Missing large
    jconnors3954  4 months ago

    Sentimental. I, for one, like it.

     •  Reply
  25. 38096534 2543 4864 8509 d06fceeba3fb
    Brent Rosenthal Premium Member 4 months ago

    If this were a movie he’d take it out and purposely scuttle it to end his life.

     •  Reply
  26. Download 1
    Strawberry King  4 months ago

    Got Oars?

     •  Reply
  27. Missing large
    rbrt6956  4 months ago

    Yes , because they are going to risk a huge lawsuit by allowing someone to use old rotten canoes.

     •  Reply
  28. Missing large
    puddleglum1066  4 months ago

    I know that rowboat. It belonged to my friend Dave some years ago. Now Dave owned this dilapidated rowboat, and his identical twin brother Don was married, and it happened that around the same time Don’s wife died and Dave’s boat sank. A couple weeks after the funeral, a little old lady at Sunday’s church mistook Dave for Don (did I mention they were identical twins?) and offered her sympathy on his loss. Dave replied, “Yeah, well, it had to happen. She was an old thing, really, with a bad crack and a big hole up front, and she stank of dead fish. Every time I got in her, she made water like you wouldn’t believe. In the end, three of my friends from the city came out and asked if they could use her. I told them she wasn’t good for much, but they insisted. Silly fools, all three of them tried to get in her at once, and when they did she split right up the middle and…”

    At that point the little old lady fainted.

    Hey, after a week of completely humor-free Crankshaft strips, somebody had to tell a joke!

     •  Reply
  29. Missing large
    puddleglum1066  4 months ago

    “Heck, if it floats…”

    Dood, it’s made of wood. Wood floats. You’re going to have to be a little more specific than that.

     •  Reply
  30. Download
    Irish53  4 months ago

    The old-timey pics look like that they are from 1935 at the latest. How old is this guy? 110 or so?

     •  Reply
  31. Missing large
    raybarb44  4 months ago

    May not be the exact one he used before but it looks like a kissing cousin to it…….

     •  Reply
  32. Missing large
    jkn1027  4 months ago

    The rental company’s insurer no doubt loves this.

     •  Reply
  33. Poster 504x498 f8f8f8 pad 600x600 f8f8f8
    Surly Squirrel Premium Member 4 months ago

    Something seems to be missing. Come back tomorrow when Eugene magically pulls two row boat oars out of his rear end.

     •  Reply
  34. Avatar92
    David Rickard Premium Member 4 months ago

    Old dude knows it won’t float. As he sinks below the surface, his las thoughts will be “Free at last! Free at last!”

     •  Reply
  35. Missing large
    Argythree  4 months ago

    Um, where’s, uh, what’s-his-name? Oh, yeah…Cranky? Under water?

     •  Reply
Sign in to comment