Breaking Cat News by Georgia Dunn for August 22, 2024

Our brightest minds are ON THE CASE!

I’m sure Elvis is already investigating the butter.

Also, I love her little yellow legal pad. Iconic.

She’ll boast the most about ghosting the toast roasting in the toaster…

Alright Talkie Toaster…. Where were you on the night of June 3rd?Who’s on first? Why DID the chicken cross the road?

Hasn’t The Woman noticed the fate of the other pieces of toast?

I thought these cats were smart enough to have figured that out already. Guess the toaster startled them so much they lost their little kitty minds!

I love Goldie’s suspicious eyes in that last panel.

Well, at least the toaster actually makes toast. There was a weird little story book called That Pesky Toaster by Ben Hillman, where the titular appliance ran around on four furry legs. When its owner put bread into its slot, it didn’t make toast, it popped up a black hole instead. Yeah, I know, NONE of the story made any sense, it was an insane string of visual non sequiturs — including a barefoot baba granny, a houseful of white geese, and a dining room hutch laden with hubcaps — but it was quirky and charming. And it’s out of print.

Bah, I’m sure there’s nothing to it.

Goldie gets a clue.

Oh, and one more thing. . .

2/16/17. Elvis’ early encounter with toast and BUTTER.

INTERESTING…

Is the “Here you go” directed at an off-camera kid?

Like the curse, “May you live in interesting times”?

It like hunting prey, cat. When toast is jumps outta it’s hiding, then that is when you is has to pounces upon it and eats it, cat.

Take care, Goldie. If that toaster is cursed (as so many of The Woman’s things are) then the toast will also be cursed. Stay away from it lest you be doomed.

Cats ain’t too smart is they. We bears is already knows what then little boxes is for.

Is the toaster’s name, Weasel? Because it always goes, POP! (Runs to hide behind, protective glass…)

When Thing 2 was around 13, I think, I’d gone out somewhere and Thing 1 wasn’t home. Thing 2 was hungry and decided she wanted a grilled cheese, but was not one to pay much attention to kitchen things so…she assembled those things to make it, buttered her bread, put the cheese on the bread, slapped everything together…and stuck it in the toaster! Once she figured out that the GFI plug had been tripped due to the minor fire in the toaster and the cheese was all over the counter underneath it, and the sparks had stopped, she decided she wasn’t hungry anymore and stayed in her room until I got home and saw the mess. That was the best toaster I’d ever had…

The bread is in the toaster, it must be time for breakfast X

I’m glad Goldie is on the case.

Maybe Puck can have a talk with Not-Talkie Toaster. Maybe ask it for a gentle, keyword, warning of incoming toast. Which will inevitably go wrong with the toaster announcing……INCOMING!!!!!!!

OH MY CAT! GENT BEAR is over on Frank and Ernest! LOL Bring pic-a-nik baskets!

Meanwhile, Back on the Nile

On Board the Good Ship Serendipity

Iggy: We have a treasure trove of s’more ingredients. Thank you, Captain Comstock.

Ta-Natash: I’ll have some of Thomios’ staff come and pick everything up. Remember the Procurers’ motto.

All: Never take more than you can lift.

Sometime Later

Iggy: We’re almost done here, Tash. Just have a load of chocolate and spread to take with us.

Apprentice Chef Narmer: We’ve had a bit of a mishap, Iggy. My colleague Menes dropped chocolate in the peanut butter.

Menes: No! Narmer got peanut butter all over the chocolate!

Tash: Don’t worry. I’m sure chef Thomios can sort it all out.

OT:

Well, it’s not necessarily much of a clue! Would you expect a moth in a mother? A sum in a summer?

I knew this would require some investigative reporting. Now that we know where the toast is coming from, where is it going?

Well, you know what they say…

ALL TOASTERS TOAST TOAST.

hummm…the toast…thickens

These days journalism just isn’t what it used to be. It’s not like they just got this toaster, and yet it has taken this long for the BCN crew to jump on this “breaking story?”

They should do a biography on the toaster, where was it made, does it like being a toaster, how does it feel after it pops up the toast? Does it enjoy the feeling of popping the toast out or does it brood on the deed after it is done? These are things that the readers would want to know.

It’s not toast yet, just bread. Yeah, I know, picky, picky, picky…

For facts in the morning, she

Stared at your coil glow and she

Searched for some answers today

Your poppin’s a bore and she wants to know more

Goldie can’t stand your loud way

Now, she knows more than she

Knew before and wow!

Such discomfort, Cat knows

The Woman is there just ’cause she needed some toast

That’s when cats hate bread the most

Oh yeah, loud flings do scare just when she needed some toast

/Randy Van Warmer /Just When I Needed You Most

The toast is toast.

In keeping with my comment yesterday that the toaster has a face—the Woman is putting bread in its eyes, no wonder it keeps popping it out! (Yes, I’m one of those people who tend to find “faces” in strange places.)

Is she putting the toast back in the toaster? Or is she putting bread in the toaster to make toast? So, Goldie, toast doesn’t go in the toaster, it comes out of it. Bread goes in the toaster and toast comes out. I can’t tell what is being done in panel 3, bread going in or toast coming out.

Looks like it’s going in. Maybe whole wheat?

Is Goldie about to learn that The Woman is responsible for all the toaster shenanigans? Has The Woman forgotten she has cats. AGAIN.

That would explain the surprise attacks. Every piece of toast must be desolated.

Cat detection or cat science? You decide.

OT: Late-Breaking Broken H00min News, & what fresh H-E-double-hockey-sticks is this…

What a Brave Little Toaster!

The bigger question is, “Why does every toaster have a setting on it that can produce nothing but the completely charred remains of whatever was placed inside?”

Giving the toaster the third degree…

Sam Sam and Jennifer Ravenel. I happen to know I can’t link to where I read it because it’ll just ask you to subscribe.

Awww. One meat never to feed your cat. The cutest photo … well, it was on the screen twice.

TOAST IN A TOASTER?!!!